Chapter 7
“Ahem, hmm. That’s right. That’s true, but… I always feel bad about making the National Security Bureau people do such difficult work. Still, having someone like Information Team Leader Seong makes me feel so reassured and at ease… You know how grateful I am in my heart, right?”
I don’t know. I’m not particularly curious either.
“Ah, yes.”
“Information Team Leader Seong is truly a hero. A national hero! Who else would come to the National Security Bureau so willingly? Right?”
It’s nice that he’s praising me, but I never went there willingly.
I wasn’t originally affiliated with the National Security Bureau. The fact that I ended up handling interrogations and spy detection in the Information Security Division was just how things turned out, not my original role.
I was originally affiliated with the Medical Bureau. To be precise, it was a research institute under the Medical Bureau, but I also worked part-time in the medical wing.
Setting aside what I experienced there, to put it simply, I didn’t integrate well with that team. Of course, it wasn’t my choice. They disliked me first.
Then one day, I received a request for assistance from Director Shin from the National Security Bureau, and I helped with that work. Then Director Shin must have thought “this is it” because she grabbed onto my pant legs and wouldn’t let go. To put it bluntly, it was a love call.
Director Shin’s earnest and pitiful sales pitch continued for over a month, and I pretended to be unable to resist and ended up planting my stake in the National Security Bureau.
…I shouldn’t have done that.
But at that time, I judged that rather than working with people who disliked me, it would be better to work with people who needed me. Besides, the National Security Bureau and Medical Bureau buildings were at opposite ends, so I thought I wouldn’t have to encounter those unpleasant people.
Director Shin was apparently quite grateful that I joined the team back then, so she even established the Information Team for me and bragged about me so much to the Center Director.
So the Center Director also goes around chanting “Information Team Leader Seong is the best!” like someone who’s been brainwashed, but I actually know. The Center Director finds me quite troublesome.
When will he realize that I have no intention of reading his mind?
“This gathering was also arranged for that reason.”
I just drank water while listening to the Center Director’s empty words. Even trying to take it positively, I thought it wasn’t something to say when they’d stuck us in a corner. Anyone could see that the main table was where Kang Juha was sitting.
Recently, the Alpha Team led by Kang Juha had been selected as the advance team for a large-scale gate. That alone was an amazing achievement, but they succeeded in subjugating it in the shortest time among gates of similar scale, causing an uproar both domestically and internationally.
So anyone with sense couldn’t help but know that this gathering was for him. Even someone like me who lives disconnected from worldly affairs knew that much.
Director Shin asked if I knew how great the work the National Security Bureau was doing and told me to take pride in it… Well. I knew without being told that heroes weren’t people like us gloomily digging through people’s memories in basements, but people who confidently go out to battle, win, and return.
To make a harsh comparison, Kang Juha is light, and I’m about a garbage dump. To even be a contrast, I’d need to be darkness at least, but at best I’m a garbage dump. The difference is so great that there’s no comparison.
I too once thought I could become an angel in white. Looking back now, it’s just a delusion that makes me laugh bitterly.
* * *
“Ugh…”
The groan that came at that moment snapped me back to reality. I turned my head to look at Kang Juha.
His furrowed brow twitched and moved. Soon his closed eyelids slowly opened, and his black pupils wandered for a moment before stopping on me. They weren’t the mad eyes I’d seen before, nor the eyes full of murderous intent, nor the wary eyes.
His gaze stayed on me for quite a while, as if trying to grasp the current situation, and I thought he might curse like he had recently. And I thought that would be a positive result in its own way.
“…Who are you?”
This I hadn’t expected.
“…Me? No, you mean me?”
“Yeah.”
“Ah, I’m Seong Ihyeon, Information Team Leader of the Information Security Division, National Security Bureau, Center.”
But I think Kang Juha just spoke informally to me with “yeah.” Am I imagining things?
“Ihyeon? Seong Ihyeon?”
No, I’m not. He’s speaking informally now, this bastard.
“It’s not Ihyeon or Seong Ihyeon, but Information Team Leader Seong Ihyeon. You can call me Team Leader Seong.”
“Information Team Leader Seong Ihyeon?”
What’s this? Why does his voice sound cheerful?
I blinked rapidly. Was it because my eyes were playing tricks on me that Kang Juha’s eyes looked innocent?
“But why am I here?”
“…This is a special treatment room in the Center’s basement. Esper Kang Juha went on a mission and was reported missing six months ago, and returned to the Center a few weeks ago with the help of allied forces.”
No matter how I thought about it, the current Kang Juha didn’t seem to be in his right mind, but I diligently explained the current situation. Then, as if his position was uncomfortable, Kang Juha shifted his body, and at the same time, chains on his left wrist made a clanking sound. Kang Juha’s gaze stayed on his own hand for quite a while.
“What’s this? It’s uncomfortable…”
A tone like he was whining. Even being generous, it was about the tone of an elementary school student. So right now, Kang Juha was acting spoiled.
“…Esper Kang Juha’s mental state is unstable, so restraints have been put on in preparation for any emergency situation. Even if it’s uncomfortable, I can’t remove them for you.”
“But you keep saying Kang Juha, Kang Juha from earlier – is Kang Juha me?”
Wow, please tell me you’re lying.
It was a moment that made me seek God even though I have no religion.
What? He’s asking if Kang Juha is him? Did I hear that right? Did Kang Juha just ask with his own mouth if he’s Kang Juha? No, if Kang Juha doesn’t know that he’s Kang Juha, then what the hell…! Hah, at this rate we’re going to have a Kang Juha personality collapse.
I tried to maintain my composure as much as possible.
“Mmm, it’s understandable that you’d be confused. I haven’t been able to find out the exact circumstances yet, but based on what Esper Kang Juha has shown so far, I had predicted that his ego would be severely damaged.”
That’s a lie. I’m incredibly flustered. I don’t know yet whether it was the anti-allied forces or not who did this, but anyway, some crazy bastard really fucked this kid up.
To apply brainwashing to the point of ego collapse. I couldn’t even fathom how much ability they poured into it, and how long Kang Juha resisted it.
“What do you mean? I don’t understand…”
“I’m telling you that you are indeed Kang Juha.”
“I see.”
Kang Juha seemed to think for a moment, staring blankly at the blanket covering him, then scanned the interior of the special treatment room.
During that time, I frantically racked my brain thinking about how to report this situation to the Center Director, and whether Kang Juha becoming an idiot was connected to me stimulating his unconscious last night.
It would be great if I could reach a clear conclusion of yes or no, but the human brain doesn’t work that simply… I couldn’t claim with certainty that it wasn’t my fault.
The Center Director’s words about restoring Kang Juha’s brain with minimal damage and Director Shin’s words about absolutely not letting Kang Juha die rang simultaneously in my head.
…Should I kill him?
Perhaps handing over Kang Juha’s corpse with a tragic death would be better than presenting them with an idiotic Kang Juha.
While I was seriously contemplating this, I felt Kang Juha tapping my shoulder.
“Are you a doctor? Am I hospitalized because I’m sick?”
He apparently sold off my earlier introduction somewhere because now he’s asking if I’m a doctor. So I was about to tell him again that I’m Information Team Leader Seong Ihyeon from the Information Security Division of the National Security Bureau.
“If I’m sick… Mom gets angry.”
What? Mom gets angry? The clearly heard dejected voice in my ear left me completely speechless.
Is it right for him to speak like that with that face? The difference between what I was seeing and hearing was so great that it caused cognitive dissonance in my brain, stopping all thought processes.
“Do you have… a mom?”
So I ended up making an unintentional dig about parents. No, of course he’d have a mom since he was born. What the hell am I saying? I couldn’t understand what I was thinking when I blurted out those words.
Moreover, I was essentially spouting nonsense to someone whose mental state wasn’t sound, so I felt intense guilt.
“Yes. Don’t you have a mom, teacher?”
Kang Juha was strong.
“…No, I don’t.”
And I lost. I didn’t just lack a mom – I didn’t have a dad either.
“Is it good not having one?”
“…I’ve never had one so I don’t know. But I suppose it would be better to have one? Generally speaking…”
He’s too good at poking exactly where it hurts – isn’t he doing this on purpose?
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
