I remembered what Chartine said. When you move or have a baby, you have to report it to the palace’s family registry, but since I belong to the temple, it might be okay to skip it. Besides, to report it, I would have to go all the way to Kellabird, which was not easy.
I couldn’t speak up right away, so Cedric looked at me and said with a sneer,
“When I think about that, I get angry, but at least you came to me safely. You didn’t touch anything else.”
His gaze never left me, like it was trapping me. My hands were already held and I couldn’t move. I saw his bare chest under his robe. His breathing seemed a little rougher, and his chest, hidden under the robe, rose and fell noticeably. When I avoided his eyes, Cedric gently lifted my chin.
“I don’t believe you don’t love me.”
When I looked at him with wide eyes, Cedric chuckled.
“If you hated me, wouldn’t you say something to me, something that would make me sick of you?”
His face was quite arrogant. I stepped back hesitantly and pulled my hand away from his.
“Don’t be mistaken.”
“Then say that to me.”
Cedric’s words stuck in my mind. Monster. That was the word Simo kept saying in my ear. She said he was already a crazy monster. Maybe I was swept away by her and misunderstood, so I said that to Cedric before. He told me not to say that to him.
That was what I felt most sorry for Cedric. After all, I didn’t trust him and said that. Because of that guilt, when we met again later, I was still controlled by him. Cedric ignored me, thinking the love I gave him was natural.
Still, I couldn’t call Cedric a monster now. I didn’t want to hurt him more, and I didn’t want to feel sorry.
Cedric raised the corner of his mouth.
“You can’t say I’m a monster right now.”
His dry voice rang sharply in my ears. I wanted to tell him clearly,
“I don’t want to be tied to you anymore. If I said something like that, I would feel sorry and get more tangled up with you.”
“Revril.”
His voice was low and deep. He looked at me with a soft smile. When I stayed silent, he spoke slowly,
“That is love.”
“……”
“I already admitted it.”
Cedric smiled and looked at me.
“You are late.”
“No, I…”
“Say it now.”
“……”
“Then I will let you go right now.”
While saying that, Cedric pressed his thigh against mine. I could feel his firm skin through my thin dress. I shivered and moved my leg. Cedric bowed his head slightly and whispered quietly in my ear,
“If you really hate me, you can say such words easily.”
“……”
“Just like you said back then.”
His breath brushed against me like soft fur. I breathed unevenly without thinking. Cedric slightly raised his head and looked at me.
His eyes looked like they would cry at any moment. Every action I took felt like it was holding me back. Cedric smiled gently and wiped the tears running down my cheek.
“Revril.”
His voice was soft, but I lowered my head without facing him. I felt his gaze, but tears kept falling. I didn’t understand why Cedric wanted me to say that on purpose. Then, my held-back feelings burst out and words came without me knowing.
“Do you have to do this much?”
I couldn’t stop crying. Cedric touched my cheek and gently lifted my face. When our eyes met, he didn’t care about my tear marks and kissed my cheek. Then, as if blowing breath, he kissed me.
I turned my face away, feeling suffocated, but he held my cheek with both hands and softly slid his tongue between my closed lips. When his soft tongue touched me, I stepped back. Cedric came closer, licking me as if to swallow me whole.
I pushed his chest in frustration, but Cedric lifted me instead. Then, he greedily explored my lips. His hot breath spread over me, and I let out a moan without meaning to.
Before I knew it, Cedric laid me on the bed and looked down at me. His bright blue eyes were unusually deep.
“When will you understand my true feelings?”
His voice was gentle, but his eyes looked like they would soon take my lips. He kept his gaze on me and said,
“You know I only have you.”
When I didn’t answer and just stared, Cedric smiled slightly.
“You only have me too.”
“I can live without you…”
“Oh?”
His eyes flashed arrogantly. If I said someone else’s name, it looked like he would act immediately. I couldn’t look at his face anymore, so I turned my head.
“Revril.”
His voice was very low. I didn’t dare to look at him, so Cedric grabbed my chin and made me look at him.
“I told you not to turn your head away.”
Before his voice reached my ear, his lips touched mine. Today, more than usual, he didn’t leave my skin.
When I came to, it was morning. Everything felt awkward when I opened my eyes. Looking around, I saw my dress hanging on a chair. Then I heard a soft voice.
“You’re awake now.”
When I lifted my head, Cedric, dressed in uniform, kissed my forehead. His clean and calm scent filled my nose and faded a little when he pulled away. I pulled the blanket up to my neck without thinking. Cedric chuckled and looked at me calmly.
“Make sure you eat breakfast. You probably didn’t sleep all night.”
Unlike me, Cedric looked very fine. His kind tone was almost scary now. My whole body still felt stiff from yesterday.
“I’ll come in before you eat dinner.”
Cedric smiled and left the room. As I stared blankly at the closed door, I soon heard a knock. Too tired to speak, I stayed still, and the door opened a little.
“Lady?”
The maid peeked in carefully through the door. When our eyes met, she hurried inside.
“I brought your breakfast.”
I spoke weakly,
“Put it on the table and go.”
But the maid looked troubled and stared at me.
“The master specially ordered.”
I was surprised but curious,
“About what?”
“She said you need a hearty breakfast this time and told me to watch you until you finish eating.”
I was speechless for a moment. The food in front of me was more than I usually ate. When I just looked at it with a blank face, the maid came to my side.
“Please eat a little, Lady.”
She looked quite worried. Maybe Cedric ordered the maid to stay by me. I had no choice but to take the fork.
There was so much food I couldn’t finish it all. When I didn’t eat more, the maid asked carefully,
“Aren’t you going to eat more?”
I put down the fork.
“I’m full.”
The maid looked at me for a moment and nodded. She must have seen the leftover food. Before, I only envied those who could buy meat. Now I was full and left food behind.
“Tell Cedric not to prepare this much from now on.”
“Yes.”
“And what do you do with the leftovers?”
“We share the leftovers.”
I was surprised when I heard that. The maid said calmly,
“Some food is thrown away, but the untouched food is shared among us.”
I looked at the table immediately. Luckily, there was much food untouched. But that didn’t mean preparing so much food was not wasteful.
“Please don’t prepare this much food from now on.”
I said again, and the maid nodded brightly.
I got up right away and went to see Vincent. Vincent was with Sahel, and today they were walking around to learn about plants.
“Lady, do you want to come too?”
Sahel asked very kindly. I wanted to go too, but today the temple people were coming, so I thought I should check the mansion once more.
“When will they come?”
“Before lunchtime, I think.”
I nodded because the temple people were likely to arrive around then.
