#083
Eventually, afterglow as long as the prolonged act washed over them. Yechan and Jiwoon were entangled naked on the bed.
Jiwoon’s touch was gentle as he caressed the hair of Yechan, who was lying with his head on Jiwoon’s arm. Yechan, feeling even more languid from the sensation of thick knuckles ruffling through his hair, asked.
“Now that exams are over, is there anything you want to do?”
“I don’t know. Just staying like this is good too.”
“That’s fortunate.” Yechan, who had been recalling Jiwoon trembling and reaching climax several times above and below him just moments ago, relaxed his body.
After their storm-like relationship ended, whenever he lay touching Jiwoon like this, both fulfillment and deficiency would simultaneously flood into Yechan’s heart. Yechan carefully licked Jiwoon’s bare chest in front of him, then sucked hard for a moment.
Jiwoon only gently stroked the back of Yechan’s head as he left marks on his body.
“Want to go out for a bit tomorrow night? There’s something I want to do.”
“Sure. What is it?”
“You’ll know when we go.”
Yechan looked up at Jiwoon and smiled prettily. The dimples on both cheeks caught his eye.
Jiwoon, who had been gazing at him quietly, soon kissed Yechan’s straight forehead. Yechan gathered his melting heart to keep it from flowing and rubbed his face against Jiwoon’s embrace.
Recently Jiwoon was terribly affectionate like this. The actions that seemed to gradually give him space, to share his heart, were indescribably joyful.
However, the more excited and happy he became, the more anxiety gradually grew in size. What if he disappeared again after getting even better like this?
Yechan familiarly swallowed his anxiety and hugged Jiwoon. Even at the embrace that squeezed so tightly it seemed like it would burst his body, Jiwoon still only stroked Yechan’s head.
However, at the same time, Jiwoon’s heart touching Yechan’s face was beating fiercely.
* * *
The next night, the two got into Yechan’s car. Even to Jiwoon’s question about where they were going, Yechan only smiled without answering.
The car traveled familiar roads. Jiwoon’s expression became puzzled as Yechan headed back to school after coming home for dinner.
Yechan’s car passed the dormitory following the road that turned from the main gate. Jiwoon dissolved the candy in his mouth and swallowed his curiosity.
Going up a bit more, Yechan parked in the parking lines drawn on the roadside and said.
“Wait just a moment.”
Yechan opened the trunk and got out of the car. Jiwoon ran his tongue over the inside of his mouth that still tasted of candy and cast his gaze outside.
The empty lot with no buildings around was bright only with the orange streetlight illuminating the pitch-black darkness. It was a place that had been bustling with people during cherry blossom season.
But now only trees with lush leaves remained alone, and the entire lawn was quiet.
“Let’s go.”
Yechan, who had returned at some point, opened the passenger door and said. As soon as Jiwoon got out of the car and saw Yechan’s hands, he burst into laughter.
“Wait, a sled?”
“Ahahaha!” Jiwoon laughed out loud and asked loudly in a rarely raised tone. Yechan grinned broadly and gestured toward the lawn.
“See that sloped area over there? It’ll be fun.”
“Wow, I’m so excited! Really!”
Jiwoon started running across the lawn, laughing heartily. His solid calves revealed below his shorts moved elastically.
Eventually reaching the top of the lawn, Jiwoon gestured to Yechan.
“Look down. This is crazy.”
“Try riding it first, hyung.”
Yechan set down the sled next to Jiwoon. It was a plastic sled that neighborhood children would carry around in winter.
The sled even had proper handle ropes attached. Jiwoon, who was giggling, got on the sled without hesitation.
When he lowered his center of gravity and moved his legs, the sled began to move forward.
“Kyaooo!”
When he kicked off the ground with his feet, the sled slid forward refreshingly. Jiwoon’s hair flew in the increasingly fast speed.
“Ahahaha!” The cheerful laughter echoed in Yechan’s ears, riding on the streetlight. The slope of the wide lawn continued quite long.
“Yechan! This is really fucking fun!”
Soon Jiwoon, who had run back dragging the sled, held out the handle to Yechan. Jiwoon’s face, with wide eyes and constantly smiling like a mischievous child, was full of joy.
“Is it fun?”
“Hurry up and try it.”
At Jiwoon’s urging, Yechan, who had been laughing, also sat on the sled. When he grabbed the rope and lowered his posture, Jiwoon pushed Yechan’s back forcefully from behind.
“Uh, hyung! Wait a moment!”
Yechan, gripping the rope tightly, began sliding down the slope. Through the wind brushing his ears, he could hear Jiwoon’s laughter.
A scream of “Aaaaah” burst from Yechan’s open mouth. The sled was really fun. The speed was faster than expected, enough to feel thrilling.
Yechan, who had reached the flat ground, forcefully stopped the sled with his heel and stood up.
“Fun, right? Hurry up, let’s ride once more!”
Yechan fixed his disheveled hair, picked up the sled, and ran to Jiwoon. The two really rode the sled enthusiastically. The operation of the lawn sled course continued until the sled cracked when it hit a rock somewhere.
“Wow, let’s ride again next time.”
“Yes. Ah, that was really fun.”
The two, who had thrown the cracked sled aside, plopped down on the lawn. They were still breathing hard from running around laughing for so long.
Jiwoon’s arms revealed under his t-shirt were hugging his knees. Yechan, who had been calmly catching his breath, dropped his head onto Jiwoon’s broad shoulder.
The warm night air tickled their hair. It was when the breathing of the two, silently leaning on each other’s body heat, was slowly finding its own pace.
Yechan dropped another water drop toward Jiwoon.
“This is a sled.”
Jiwoon’s breath suddenly stopped at the memory that flashed by. Could it be…
The large cherry tree visible in front was shaking wildly in the wind. The rustling branches were like Jiwoon’s heart.
“You…”
“Damaging cultural properties is a crime.”
There had been a photo Yechan sent in response to his own words about wanting to ride a sled at the royal tomb. “Not a sled.” It was a post he had uploaded on SNS like a whim because he had no way to control his heart that felt like it would burst.
After a moment of silence, Jiwoon soon tilted his head back. The black night sky filled his blurred vision.
Jiwoon tried somehow to focus on the distant stars, but his thoroughly wet eyes couldn’t function properly at all.
Yechan, without lifting his head from Jiwoon’s shoulder, took in the fluttering cherry tree with his eyes. Several leaves flew away in the wind.
“Let’s come ride again.”
“…Yeah.”
His momentarily anxious heart found stability in the promise of next time. Yechan tried to focus on the leaves safely hanging on the tree branches and closed his eyes.
Jiwoon slowly raised his hand and rubbed around his eyes. Light brown hair was tickling his white nape.
That night, Jiwoon couldn’t fall asleep easily. Over the face of sleeping Yechan, the young face of high school student Seo Yechan flickered.
Probably Yechan had lived upright and dignified, straight and proper as always, even when he wasn’t there.
But even thinking that way, his heart kept pounding restlessly. It was like the sensation of dropping down with a thud, and at the same time like the sensation of floating up endlessly to the sky.
* * *
Finally, Jiwoon began to imagine Yechan’s times that he had simply concluded would have been fine.
Seo Yechan at the end of eighteen. Nineteen-year-old Seo Yechan. Twenty-year-old Seo Yechan. Seo Yechan at the beginning of twenty-one. And now, the Seo Yechan he met again.
What had he been doing and what thoughts had he been living with all this time?
What he was most curious about was still the person Yechan liked. Only then did Jiwoon begin to dig into assumptions he had never considered.
This was a question that had never existed in Jiwoon’s world until now. Now Jiwoon stood before something completely unfamiliar.
Jiwoon carefully reviewed the past. The words he had said to Yechan since their reunion passed through his mind.
He had to hide it somehow, so he tried to hide it. It was only a few weeks ago that he, who had been like that, decided to reveal the heart he had tried so hard to conceal.
Then what about Seo Yechan during that time? What the hell was he thinking?
Jiwoon, who had been tracing past times from Yechan’s perspective, suddenly widened his eyes. It was because he had thought of something.
It was an impossible premise, but his heart was beating so much from that sentence that it almost hurt. While denying it wouldn’t be true, bolts and nuts tightened in his head. Gears turned and connected chains moved.
Eventually, something enormous began rotating in his head. Thunder and lightning struck his head with bangs.
“Fuck, wait.” Jiwoon couldn’t stand it and sat up. His lips were tightly bitten so that no sound would accidentally leak out.
First, he had to get out of here. As he was now, he had no confidence to see Yechan in front of him or hear his breathing.
Jiwoon carefully got up. After quietly closing the door and coming out to the living room, Jiwoon soon collapsed onto the living room sofa and gripped his chin tightly. It was because he felt like he would scream if he didn’t cover his mouth.
Jiwoon searched through the wreckage of things he had burned without even looking. He lifted up the pieces that were ruined in the ashes, damaged by fire, and calmly washed them.
And slowly, very slowly, he carefully fitted the pieces together one by one.
Puzzles that had been scattered too far for too long were being assembled.
The person Seo Yechan liked.
A puzzle with only one piece missing was drawing Lee Jiwoon.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
