#073
“This is it. Get lost.”
Jiwoon finally spat out the end. Yechan’s mind went blank for an instant as he desperately grabbed Jiwoon’s wrist, but he was soon bounced off as if struck by Jiwoon’s hand.
Yechan hurriedly hugged Jiwoon’s waist from behind.
“Hyung, I’ll explain. It’s not like that. Don’t go.”
Jiwoon let out a long sigh and seemed to turn around while putting his hand under Yechan’s arm, then Yechan’s vision spun around. When he came to his senses, he was sprawled on the floor.
Jiwoon, who had used a technique to remove Yechan, immediately stepped away. Yechan first grabbed Jiwoon’s calf tightly as he could see it.
As soon as his leg was caught, Jiwoon kicked Yechan hard without hesitation. Even as his body bent from the pain of being hit in the back, Yechan quickly continued speaking.
“Cha Yewon is preparing to be a celebrity! An agency made an offer and told her to come to a hotel. She asked me to go with her because she asked!”
Thud, thud. Jiwoon kept his mouth shut and continued kicking to remove Yechan who was holding his leg. Yechan, who was hit hard in the shoulder, held his breath with a gasp and then exhaled.
“Among the men she knows, I’m the only trustworthy person, her parents died early and she lives with her grandmother…! She can’t afford to go with her father either. So I went with her!”
Finally, Jiwoon’s movement stopped abruptly. Yechan, who was watching Jiwoon breathing roughly, buried his forehead against his white ankle. Light brown hair scattered over Jiwoon’s foot.
“I’ve never had sex with her. I’ve never had sexual skinship, not even once. I’ve never done anything I couldn’t tell hyung about… Please believe me.”
Yechan, who had been constantly rubbing his forehead, suddenly straightened his upper body. Yechan, who had his knees on the floor and stretched his body to hug Jiwoon tightly, buried his face in Jiwoon’s stomach.
“Please, hyung… It’s a misunderstanding. I just went with her so I didn’t think I needed to mention it. Don’t be angry. When hyung is angry, it’s too scary. I don’t know what to do.”
Only then did the strength drain from Jiwoon’s body. His rough breathing remained the same, but Jiwoon, whose momentum had been broken, ran his hand through his hair in a tired voice.
“Yechan.”
“Yes, hyung.”
At Jiwoon finally opening his mouth, Yechan looked up at Jiwoon. Jiwoon’s gaze lingered for a moment on his swollen red cheeks and split bleeding lips.
“How can I believe that?”
“I’ll call Cha Yewon. Right now.”
“What?”
Yechan, fearing that Jiwoon might go somewhere, hurriedly took out his phone from his pants pocket while hugging him.
Yechan, who really pressed the call button and put it on speakerphone, avoided Jiwoon’s hand trying to stop him and threw the phone far away.
Then he hugged Jiwoon tightly. Jiwoon tried to strike down Yechan’s arms that were hugging him so he couldn’t move.
Then a clear voice was heard.
—Hello!
“Cha Yewon. I’m with my lover right now.”
Jiwoon’s expression crumpled at Yechan’s words. However, his heart pounded madly.
—What? You got a lover? You? Amazing! Why didn’t you tell me?
“Never mind that, I need to explain about going to the hotel with you.”
—…Huh?
“Explain with your own mouth. Starting with what you asked me.”
—What? No, wait. What’s… Ah, ah! I get it roughly. Is your lover next to you right now?
“Yeah.”
Cha Yewon explained the situation in a slightly excited voice. Except for the fact that Yechan received 100,000 won as payment for going with her, it was the same content as what Yechan had said earlier.
Yechan finished the call after hearing Cha Yewon say she was sorry to his lover and that they should definitely eat together sometime.
“That’s enough. Hang up.”
—You brat. Anyway, yes, good luck with your relationship! Do well so you don’t get dumped!
Even after the call ended, Jiwoon stood there silently for a long time. Yechan also caught his breath while still hugging Jiwoon.
Jiwoon let out a small sigh in the quiet silence and quietly cursed under his breath.
“Fucking hell.”
Only then did the strength drain from Yechan’s arms. Jiwoon, who had violently messed up his hair and even washed his face dry, helped Yechan up.
It was hard to look at those clear eyes staring at him. Just die. His head was dizzy with shame.
“There’s no one but hyung. Please believe me.”
At Yechan’s words that sounded almost desperate, Jiwoon’s heart dropped again.
Yechan took Jiwoon’s hands and slowly caressed them. His eyes looking at the reddened hands were deeply lowered.
“Haah.” Jiwoon let out a long sigh and grabbed Yechan’s shirt, who was still exposing his bare body, and finished taking it off.
“Go wash up and change clothes. We’re going to the hospital.”
“I’m fine.”
“You have to go. We’re going.”
If he didn’t take Yechan to the hospital, he felt like he’d go crazy with self-loathing. Jiwoon pushed Yechan’s back and shoved him into the bathroom.
After washing and tidying up the living room, Jiwoon immediately put Yechan in the car and headed to the hospital.
While Yechan was being examined, Jiwoon called his parents to inform them he’d be staying out overnight. His parents were disappointed that he couldn’t say goodbye before their departure tomorrow, but they sent their concerns when they heard that his close junior was injured.
“What did they say?”
“They said it’s fine. The bones are fine too. Just told me not to overdo it. I got medicine too.”
“Hah… sorry.”
Jiwoon said with his head deeply bowed, unlike himself. Fuck. Curses kept bursting from inside.
He really couldn’t face Yechan. Yechan grabbed and pulled Jiwoon’s wrist.
“It’s okay. I’m having a hard time. Let’s go home now.”
As Jiwoon slowly drove to Yechan’s house, he kept sighing and said in a small voice.
“I’m going to take care of you today and sleep over.”
At those words, Yechan brightened up. His lips kept curling up without him knowing. Yechan quickly pressed down his lips and asked.
“Didn’t your parents come? Shouldn’t you be with them?”
“They’re busy anyway since they’re leaving tomorrow. I told them.”
“I like it so much. I could get hit a few more times.” Yechan, who had dangerous thoughts inside, continued speaking.
“What kind of care will you give me?”
“What do you need?”
“Everything.”
“What?”
“First, when we get there, I need to wash, so please wash me. Putting on clothes and… let’s order porridge for food. Brush my teeth too.”
“Yechan, are you a newborn?”
“Ah… Suddenly my whole body hurts so much.”
At Jiwoon speaking as if it was absurd, Yechan curled up his body and spoke. Jiwoon frowned and answered.
“I’ll do it. So don’t have strange thoughts about jealousy or whatever.”
“Yes!”
“Hyung is an idiot.” Yechan, who had briefly pouted his lips as if to show off, curled up his lips while hunched over.
Thinking about it again, it was just good. Yechan had already seen the possibility. Yechan fell into thought about how to unravel this clue going forward, delighted.
On the other hand, Jiwoon couldn’t relax his expression due to the overwhelming sense of defeat. It was true that he had felt betrayal toward Yechan and jealousy toward Cha Yewon.
But he couldn’t let Yechan think that way. To Yechan, who had someone he liked, his jealousy would be burdensome.
Furthermore, Yechan’s twisted emotions might be giggling while seeing the jealous Jiwoon and calculating the possibility of subjugation.
Jiwoon hated both of these assumptions to death. It was terrible. As expected, he shouldn’t reveal even the slightest possibility of his feelings being discovered.
“I can’t be found out. I have to take good care of him and send him away.” Jiwoon bit his tongue as he reminded himself once again.
Jiwoon was a tunnel for Yechan’s destination. A dark, deep tunnel where he could throw away damp things.
And tunnels were meant to end someday. Yechan’s destination should be bright and warm. Not something dim like himself.
Leaving behind the surging regret and greed, Jiwoon tried hard to imagine Yechan laughing with a pretty girlfriend under the sunlight.
“…Still, it’s fortunate that he wasn’t ruined.” Relief belatedly bloomed in a corner of Jiwoon’s heart that wished for Yechan’s happiness.
When they arrived home, Jiwoon really washed, dressed, and fed Yechan. He was so exhausted that he was grateful when Yechan said he would brush his teeth himself after eating.
Jiwoon, who had squeezed toothpaste on the toothbrush and handed it over before closing the bathroom door, slumped down in his seat. His face as he shook his head was completely exhausted.
He had even sucked Yechan’s erect member while washing him, so even his jaw was throbbing. “Is this what it feels like to raise a child?” As Jiwoon was thinking such thoughts, his phone suddenly rang and he searched his pants pocket.
Yoon Jukyung: Jiwoon Jiwoon, how are you?
Yoon Jukyung: I came to my parents’ house, want to meet briefly?
Yoon Jukyung: Mom gave me a painting to give you ㅎㅎ
Me: What painting all of a sudden
Yoon Jukyung: She said she thought of you as soon as she saw this
Yoon Jukyung: Me too, just meet me ㅎㅎ
Me: Tomorrow evening 8 PM at my house
Yoon Jukyung: Okay see you tomorrow ㅋㅋㅎ
Jiwoon took his phone and went to the sofa to lie down. Fatigue washed over him. When he closed his eyes like that, sleep came easily.
Yechan, who came out of the bathroom, carried the sleeping Jiwoon to the bed. Jiwoon, who briefly opened his eyes to glance at Yechan lifting him and then closed them again, looked tired.
Yechan turned off the lights in the room and lay down next to Jiwoon. When he covered him with a blanket, Jiwoon soon made deep breathing sounds.
Yechan, who had been looking at the white face sleeping without moving for a long time, clearly felt his heart pounding and closed his eyes.
Yechan woke up and opened his eyes. When he turned to his side, Jiwoon’s face, still asleep, filled his vision.
“Ah, good.” Yechan slowly blinked and looked at Jiwoon’s sleeping face. Below his closed eyes, black eyelashes came down long.
Yechan, who had traced his prominent nose and bridge, and slightly parted lips in order, swallowed dry saliva. Next to his slightly sunken cheek from losing weight compared to before was the firm jawbone he liked.
Eventually, Yechan, who had been staring at the black hair flowing down next to his white forehead, let out a small breath. It was when he reached out and tried to embrace Jiwoon’s body.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
