#069
Jiwoon gazed for a long time at Yechan’s white face as he slept. Yechan, who slept with an angelic face, was completely twisted and obsessed with him.
There was definitely an option to enjoy Yechan’s obsession and possessiveness and play along like this. It would surely be a thrilling, exciting relationship full of tension and thrills.
However, he had to be extremely careful. The moment his feelings for Yechan were discovered, Yechan’s burst of madness would try to subjugate him.
Jiwoon let out a hollow laugh. Wasn’t this a horribly distorted relationship?
It wasn’t that the option of playing along wasn’t appealing. From the beginning, Jiwoon knew he was closer to a devil than a saint.
But that relationship would surely wear away both their bodies and minds. Jiwoon didn’t want to destroy Yechan.
Moreover, such pain was something he had already experienced once before. Letting out a small sigh and recalling the sex they’d just had, Jiwoon easily predicted the devastating end that a relationship born from obsession and possessiveness would bring.
Jiwoon’s eyes deepened as he stared at Yechan’s straight forehead.
Seo Yechan was sad. He was sad that Yechan, not content with just unrequited love, was trying to tear apart a black doll with dark emotions stemming from him.
He felt pity. Jiwoon wanted Yechan to be happy.
And for that to happen, simple comfort wasn’t enough. A different method was needed. This was his karma.
“Haah…”
Eventually, Jiwoon decided to scrub away the dark emotions clinging to the doll. It wasn’t because he wanted to become clean. For Yechan’s good love that would come someday, he needed to somehow fade the doll’s presence.
Yechan had to be happy. Jiwoon decided to embrace, coax, and soothe Yechan’s twisted emotions.
He planned to reduce hatred and make betrayal fade. He would calm anger and release the desire for revenge.
So what was needed in the end was love. And Jiwoon already overflowed with love.
* * *
“Goodbye.” Yechan stood up from his seat after finishing the group project.
These days, every day was excessively enjoyable. Jiwoon was right in front of his eyes, and when he turned his gaze, he could see Jiwoon.
Sometimes thirst surged up from the bottom of his chest, but he could endure that much. Compared to before, these were incredibly fulfilling days.
He spotted Jiwoon in a corner of the cafe with his knees up, earphones in, taking notes. He looked cute as he puffed out one cheek and brought a straw to his mouth, as if something wasn’t going well.
Jiwoon, curled up in his seat, looked like a baby tiger again today. Yechan looked at Jiwoon’s broad shoulders and firmly stretched legs and imagined stroking him from the crown of his head to his tailbone.
“Finished?”
“Yes. Did you solve everything?”
“Not yet. But there aren’t many left.”
Jiwoon lowered his head again and moved his hand. Watching Jiwoon’s handwriting as he solved the quiz, Yechan suddenly spoke.
“I used the notebook and watch you gave me well. Thank you.”
Jiwoon looked up and met Yechan’s eyes. After blinking several times, Jiwoon made an “ah” sound.
“I got a perfect score on the Suneung.”
At those words, Jiwoon’s eyes slowly widened, then he smiled broadly, showing his white teeth. At the expression full of joy, Yechan’s heart pounded.
Jiwoon raised his hand and ruffled Yechan’s hair.
“Yechan did well.”
“That’s all?”
Yechan asked, smiling along with Jiwoon. Every time he smiled at him like that, expectation filled his chest. He felt like acting spoiled.
“What should I do for you?”
Jiwoon asked as he fixed Yechan’s bangs that he had messed up.
“Um… want to drink? Since last time we were already a bit drunk, let’s not count that and drink properly again. The promise we made before.”
Yechan asked, looking at the wine bottles lined up decoratively beyond Jiwoon. This cafe changed its menu to operate as a wine bar at night.
Jiwoon recalled distant memories for a moment, even thinking of Yechan in his school uniform, then shook his head.
“Today?”
“Sounds good.”
It happened to be Friday. Jiwoon answered, looking back on the hectic week that had passed.
“Alright. Do you have more to do? I just need to finish this.”
“Then I’ll just organize my assignment for a bit.”
Jiwoon nodded. The ivory sweatshirt looked particularly good on him. Yechan turned his head, opened his laptop, and organized the content that had come up during the group project.
The way home was blocked. Yechan’s car moved slowly in the rush hour traffic jam.
Perhaps because it took quite a long time to travel such a short distance, Jiwoon’s eyes kept closing.
“Spring fatigue?” Yechan naturally pushed the muttering Jiwoon into the bathroom and opened the storage cabinet.
With the sound of water from the bathroom as background music, Yechan selected several bottles of wine. It was worth collecting vintages from wineries recommended by instructors after he started getting interested in cooking.
After neatly arranging the selected wine bottles, Yechan quickly headed to the bathroom. Yechan finished his shower while thinking about dishes that would go well with wine.
When he came out after washing, Jiwoon was asleep on the sofa with wet hair. Even though Yechan lightly shook out the moisture from his hair, Jiwoon didn’t wake up.
Yechan quietly went to the kitchen and set up the wine and started cooking. Jiwoon, who hadn’t woken up even when his hair was being dried, slept for a long time despite the clattering sounds.
Yechan’s lips curved, wondering if his house had become that comfortable for him. His heart became incredibly peaceful. Satisfaction rose like waves.
Yechan placed pasta, salad, and chop steak on the table. Whether it was the sound of plates settling on the glass table or the smell stimulating his sense of smell, only then did Jiwoon open his eyes.
“Looks delicious.”
“You’re hungry.”
“Catch me.”
Jiwoon stretched both hands out. Yechan strode over to such Jiwoon, grabbed his upper arms, and pulled him up.
Jiwoon, who sat up leaning against Yechan’s firm arms, hugged a sofa cushion and blinked his not-quite-awake eyes. As he stared blankly at the coffee table that was completely set up, Yechan served pasta on a plate and handed it to Jiwoon.
Jiwoon took the fork, put a bite of pasta in his mouth, and chewed.
“It’s a taste that completely wakes you up.”
“Is it okay?”
“You really don’t want to go into business?”
“No.”
Yechan answered firmly and opened the wine. Watching Yechan skillfully twist and pull out the cork that came out cleanly, Jiwoon suddenly said.
“You’re good at it.”
“I learned from my mother.”
“You drink with your mother too?”
“I drank once.”
On the day Yechan turned twenty, his mother had spread various types of alcohol on the dining table, saying she would teach him proper drinking etiquette.
Yechan, who had sat down somewhat flustered, tried each type of alcohol one glass at a time and received various tips from his mother as diverse as the types of alcohol.
Thinking of his mother who had smiled saying that even without a father, she was capable enough to teach her son, Yechan smiled.
Watching him, Jiwoon quietly smiled. Somehow, the fact that Yechan was a beloved son at home made him inexplicably happy.
The wine Yechan chose was quite good. From the grape aroma that spread the moment it was poured into the glass, to the taste in his mouth and the feeling after swallowing, everything was to Jiwoon’s taste.
Having his wine preferences perfectly targeted, Jiwoon thought for a very brief moment that the fact he would have to send Yechan away later was painfully sad.
“…So that professor is really terrible.”
“I agree.”
The alcohol started on an empty stomach quickly circulated through his blood vessels. Jiwoon, who was genuinely hungry, quickly emptied the food, and accordingly kept emptying wine as well.
When they had emptied three bottles, Yechan cleared the empty plates and brought out a cheese plate and melon. Jiwoon chuckled at the melon topped with prosciutto.
“Get married, Yechan.”
“I told you before. I won’t.”
“You really should.”
“Hyung, you’re drunk.”
“I think so.”
Jiwoon said, shaking his head.
“What should I do if you’re already drunk when you said you’d drink with me?”
While Jiwoon desperately held out at department gatherings, there was no reason to do so in Yechan’s warm and cozy space. “I’m drunk on your face.” Recalling that rather embarrassing thought, Jiwoon laughed again.
“Aren’t you drunk?”
“I’m drunk. A little.”
“Wow… Yechan’s a heavy drinker.”
“Is that something you should say?”
Yechan picked up his glass and poured in the remaining wine. Jiwoon, who had been quietly watching Yechan open new wine, recalled him calling during the school trip.
It feels like yesterday when I cursed him for being cheeky. Yechan, who was pouring wine so skillfully, seemed strangely unfamiliar.
“I’m really drunk, damn, like an old man.” Just as Jiwoon was thinking that Hayeon, who constantly teased him about being an old man, might have rubbed off on him and shook his head several times.
“This one tastes the best.”
Yechan, who had swirled the wine poured in his glass and tasted a sip, blinked. Jiwoon held the wine Yechan had poured for him in his mouth and smiled with languid, shining eyes.
“Good.”
Wine was good alcohol to drink with a lover. Unlike soju that hit you quickly or whiskey with its impact, it slowly and unknowingly intoxicated you, which was like that.
The intoxication that was warm but suddenly rose hotly at some point was like helplessly falling into love without knowing your clothes were getting wet. Jiwoon felt his senses dulling and his face relaxing.
Of course, it didn’t matter at all. What was in front of him was Seo Yechan, whom he loved endlessly.
“Eat while you drink.”
A melon popped into the mouth of Jiwoon, who had been holding his wine glass with both hands and sipping. The salty prosciutto and melon went quite well together.
The salty-sweet taste spreading in his mouth cleared his intoxication a little. After swallowing the melon, Jiwoon took another sip of wine and put down his glass.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
