Seiyad stared intently at the lips that always spoke such beautiful words. As he recalled the moment—speaking with Ressas deep in this forest, and not with just anyone—he couldn’t help but reflect.
How did it come to this?
So much had diverged from his original intentions. He had never planned to let Ressas get this close to his life.
Because the more important Ressas became…
…the more meaning he began to assign to the conflicts from his previous life.
Back when he saw himself as nothing more than a loathsome, hateful man who deserved death, his heart had been at peace. So long as he thought Ressas had merely killed someone who needed to die, he felt no resentment.
But as Ressas continued whispering of love, as Seiyad became acutely aware of how deep that love ran, he couldn’t help but wonder—why now? Why like this?
The way Ressas touched him was so desperate, so scorching, it felt like it would steal the breath from his lungs. His unconscious kept reaching out for that warmth. And yet, the more accustomed he grew to Ressas’s presence, the more Seiyad found himself wrestling with conflicting urges—to hold him close, and to push him away.
Especially now.
As he saw Ressas grasp things he could never have guessed at himself, Seiyad was forced to admit—Ressas in that past life must not have been any different from the Ressas standing before him now.
If, back then, he had known that Aster possessed such power… if he had known that the Purification would be a problem… if he had known what Aster was plotting…
Even if you had needed to kill me, there was no need to call me the most monstrous being in the world.
“I don’t understand what kind of love Your Highness speaks of.”
That’s why—it was easier to dismiss Ressas’s feelings now as nothing more than desire. The more sincere those feelings seemed, the more shallow and fickle they felt to Seiyad, as though they’d shift with circumstance.
And Seiyad wasn’t idle enough to be swayed by such fleeting emotions. Just accepting the ever-revealing truths that surfaced day after day already left his heart in turmoil.
“If I had continued to stand at the Crown Prince’s side, acting cold and inhuman as before, would Your Highness still say the same? That was barely six months ago. Even if you acted harshly just to keep your distance, the discomfort you felt toward me hasn’t disappeared. And yet, you say you love someone like me?”
That alone should’ve been enough. But the pain buried beneath his lips slipped out.
“If things had continued like that… Your Highness would have surely called me the most monstrous being in the world.”
That black, suffocating ache rising inside him—Seiyad hated it. Pretending not to feel it, swallowing it down and playing the part—that would have been more like him. But for Ressas of all people to be the one who’d said those words…
No. This wasn’t the time. He was playing with emotions for no good reason.
Regret surged over exposing himself like that, and Seiyad turned his head. It had only been a few minutes since they eliminated the nearby Nir’a, and already others were creeping in to fill the void. There was no time for idle chatter. Reminding himself of that, Seiyad decided to cooperate with Ressas for now. He had no idea how Ressas had foreseen this, but if this battle would last a full day, there was no time to rest.
“…No, Duke.”
Ressas’s voice came soft. He sounded like someone deeply wounded, every breath strangled by pain. The sound alone made Seiyad wince as he turned to look—yet the white uniform bore no sign of injury.
“If ever there comes a day when I say such a thing to you…”
Perhaps it was his imagination, but for a moment, Ressas’s gaze flickered to Seiyad’s chest before dropping again. He touched his lips gently. The veins stood out sharply on the back of his hand—the same hand Seiyad had seen when Ressas stabbed him with a sword.
Come to think of it, whenever Ressas was emotionally shaken…
“…it would only be because I had no other choice. You are my moon. I may sulk or feel hurt by the moon that always stayed with me, but I could never bring myself to hate you. Every moment of my life exists solely for you.”
As Ressas spoke, he gave a tearful smile. His lips stretched into several forced smiles before his face returned to its usual calm expression. Only the tense veins on the back of his hand betrayed his emotional turmoil.
A strange feeling welled up. His head resented Ressas, but his heart whispered that the words might be true. Throat dry, Seiyad forcefully averted his eyes and turned instead to Vine and Rigda, who had just arrived beside them. Refusing to meet Ressas’s gaze, Seiyad gave the order.
“From now on, the two of you will assist me in capturing the Nir’a. There are many of them, but they’re no more than mid-tier. With your skills, you should be more than capable of covering my back. Just make sure you don’t overexert yourselves and protect His Highness.”
“Yes, Duke.”
He twisted his body away so as not to face Ressas and addressed him as well.
“I’ll let you know if I need you to purify me.”
With that, Seiyad turned his back. He felt Ressas’s gaze pressing against it, but he knew—if he turned and saw Ressas looking sorrowful, he might falter. So he remained silent and raised his sword.
Just as Ressas had said, the battle dragged on. No matter how many Nir’a they killed, more kept appearing. It wasn’t just a feeling—Seiyad began to suspect that every Nir’a in the southern forest might have gathered here. The trees gave no hint of direction, so they used the position of the sun in the sky to guide their way forward.
“…Let’s rest a moment.”
Seiyad realized that vine and Rigda, following behind him, sounded noticeably more fatigued than before. Naturally so. No matter how skilled a knight was, fighting continuously for half a day would wear anyone down—especially when their foes were Nir’a, beings that stirred terror in the soul.
“No, we can’t rest while there are still this many enemies. The more we kill, the safer someone else becomes.”
Unlike his usual playful self, Vine had remained serious and grim throughout the battle with the Nir’a. Hearing his words, Seiyad considered how the other Tither scattered across the forest were faring. He was especially worried about Cecilia. Although they had all willingly split up knowing that low-tier Nir’a posed little actual threat, Cecilia—having the least experience facing fear—might be struggling.
Given that he still couldn’t sense her presence, it seemed the distance between them must be significant…
“It’s better to rest briefly and fight more efficiently afterward. You must’ve noticed that our attacks have grown sloppier compared to earlier.”
At Seiyad’s remark, Vine let out a sigh and collapsed onto the ground, running his sweat-soaked hands through his hair. Rigda, who had been silently guarding his side, planted her greatsword into the ground and leaned against it, preparing to rest.
“I don’t know how you two aren’t tired. I get it with you, Duke, but even His Highness is a monster. Ever since you became a Guide, I don’t think I’ve seen you tired even once.”
Vine had probably meant it as a compliment, but Seiyad glanced at Ressas upon hearing the word “monster.” When Ressas was young, the Queen—his own mother—would often call him a “black-haired monster.” Seiyad had heard that ever since he started giving Ressas attention, those cruel remarks had lessened, but Queen Leana had always regarded her child with a deep-seated loathing.
In that light, it was no wonder Ressas didn’t think of her as a mother.
Seiyad recalled something Ressas had once said to him. With time, certain things came to make sense—Ressas’s words were among them. While thinking about it, their eyes met. True to Vine’s comment, Ressas didn’t seem particularly fatigued. Back in the forest before his awakening, he had visibly struggled.
Now, Ressas smiled gently—a clear, unaffected smile that dismissed everything previously said. The lightness of it made Seiyad’s heart feel heavy. He wanted to step away. He couldn’t sleep, but at the very least, he needed to refill his water.
“Stay here for a while.”
“What? We’ve rested enough. Let’s keep going. We don’t have time for this. If the Nir’a make it down to the village, it’ll be a disaster.”
Vine was almost obsessively desperate. He had been highly proactive about joining the subjugation effort from the start. It was rare for someone to be this invested in battling the Nir’a unless there was a personal reason, so Seiyad studied him closely. Then he remembered something Vine had said just before the mission.
“This is your hometown, isn’t it?”
“…How did you know?”
“You said it loudly enough for everyone to hear. I just remembered.”
“Yes. I’m from the south. Both Rigda and I are from Takhan. That’s why… I can’t bear the thought of our village being in danger.”
“Takhan is quite far. Even if the Nir’a break out of the forest, they’re unlikely to make it that far.”
From Seiyad’s experience, even accounting for hypothetical futures that hadn’t yet occurred, there had been almost no cases of the Nir’a spreading as far as a half-day’s journey from the forest. The only place he had seen such a thing was in the dreams that came after death.
“No, it’s happened before. Ah, maybe the Duke wasn’t born yet at the time?”
“…When was this?”
“The year we were born. That makes it… twenty-eight years ago now. I heard the Duke is twenty-five this year, right?”
Hearing “twenty-five” made Seiyad frown. He felt far older inside—already thirty in mind—but his body had yet to catch up. He had assumed Vine was younger, but it turned out he was three years older. That made him the same age as Aster, didn’t it?
That realization brought something else to mind—something that hadn’t seemed significant back when he couldn’t even fathom Aster’s connection to the Devil. But now, it held considerable weight.
“Wasn’t the former Queen residing in Takhan at the time? The royal knights would’ve been stationed at her estate. And the village still suffered major damage? What happened to the knights?”
“Oh, that’s right. I was just a newborn, so I don’t remember, but I heard the knights were completely tied up. Something huge happened at the estate.”
“What kind of incident?”
“I just heard it was… something big. Rigda, do you remember anything?”
“The adults kept it hushed. I never heard the details. No one dares to speak lightly about the former Queen after her death.”
The fact that the former Queen died giving birth to Aster had long been a source of shame for both the King and the Crown Prince, which made her a near-taboo subject. But for all that to have happened in the South—during a time when the Nir’a were rampant, and on the very night Aster was born—the pieces were starting to come together.
And the one who confirmed it was Ressas.
“That night, the former Queen passed away while giving birth to my brother. That’s why. I heard the estate was thrown into complete chaos.”
All eyes turned to Ressas. He accepted their stares quietly, letting them slide past as he gazed up at the now-risen moon. The white moonlight spilled across his face.
“It was a tragedy, but perhaps… the Queen finally found peace in death. After all, she brought the kingdom’s heir into the world—someone she had wished for so desperately, even if it meant pleading with the Devil. For years, she suffered under the King’s daily scorn because she couldn’t conceive. Her resentment must’ve run deep.”
A bitter expression crossed Ressas’s face as he spoke.
“The power of the Guide was never meant to be a tool for power, but a promise from the Sun to the Moon, born of love. But it seems everyone’s forgotten that. The royal family changed long ago. It wouldn’t be strange if someone now longed for the end of the world.”
With every word, it became clearer—Ressas was subtly revealing something. Though bound by some unknown constraint, he couldn’t speak plainly. Yet he was laying the path in such a way that Seiyad could see it.
As if he had been waiting for the moment Seiyad would finally begin to suspect.
