Chapter 103
I checked for missed call notifications, wondering if Joo Kwon-oh might have called while I was talking to my mom. But it was in vain. The call log was clean.
I pushed back my messy hair and checked the time. As the boss had asked, I had to go to work today to help with packaging and shipping.
It was originally my day off, and I had promised to go in two hours earlier than usual, so getting ready to leave was more painful than usual.
I got out of bed, unable to shake off my low spirits.
As soon as I arrived at work just in time, I saw the chaotic interior of the store.
The store, which hadn’t opened today to meet the shipping deadline, was filled with wrapping paper, boxes, paper from purchases, and trash.
It made sense, as gift wrapping required different paper for each type of product, so we had to check each order individually, making it a particularly cumbersome task for large orders.
“Hello, boss.”
“Oh, you came.”
The boss, buried in a pile of boxes in the corner, greeted me with delight for coming in on my day off as promised.
“What should I start with?”
“You can start packaging based on these order forms. You’re okay with that, right? It’s what you usually do.”
“Yes.”
“Ask if there’s anything you don’t understand.”
“Okay.”
With that, we quietly focused on our respective tasks.
The boss had already stayed up all night and packaged about half by himself. We just needed to wrap the rest well by the afternoon, attach product names, and put them in shipping boxes.
Although the volume was large, it was work we were used to, so the boss and I moved in mechanical synchronization.
As we worked, time passed quite well. Maybe it was fortunate to be able to kill time like this. Otherwise, I would have spent all day wallowing in self-loathing, recalling yesterday’s events.
As we moved busily, distracting thoughts quickly disappeared. We finished packaging aggressively until evening. We safely completed the final address verification and handed the items over to the courier company.
However, the work didn’t end there. Afterwards, we had to clean up the messy store, process other pending orders, and manage inventory.
As closing time approached, I habitually glanced outside.
Although my memory was hazy, I’m pretty sure I told Kwon-oh yesterday that I had to work on Wednesday too… Would he remember?
Until now, when it was time to leave work, Kwon-oh would always come to pick me up near the store, or if he couldn’t make it, he would at least leave a short KakaoTalk message.
I wondered if he would come to pick me up at closing time today too.
Although we parted on bad terms yesterday… Even if he doesn’t come because he’s upset, wouldn’t he at least send a KakaoTalk message?
As closing time drew nearer, I found myself expecting more without realizing it.
“You worked hard today. You can go home first.”
The boss, who had been rustling around in the warehouse, came out to the store five minutes before closing time and said.
“There’s still work left…”
“Leave it. It’s just cleaning up now, so there’s nothing difficult left.”
“Ah, okay.”
“You must be tired, go on. Oh, and let’s subtract the two hours you came in early today from your next work day.”
“Okay. Good work today.”
The boss nodded, dealing with the remaining work with dark circles under his eyes.
I quickly finished tidying up around me and left work with my things. Having come in early today and worked non-stop, I was exhausted.
Trying to suppress my nervousness, I looked around the alley. Most of the nearby shops were closed, so the street was dark. Kwon-oh usually waited for me at the end of the right alley, so I habitually stepped in that direction.
But the figure that always greeted me in the same spot wasn’t there. I lingered for a moment under the streetlight where Kwon-oh always stood, then went to the opposite side of the alley.
There were a few restaurants open late on this side, so on days when we planned to have dinner together, Kwon-oh would sometimes wait here.
“…He’s not here.”
As I had somewhat expected, Kwon-oh wasn’t on the opposite side either. He didn’t come to pick me up today. No KakaoTalk, no call.
Is this how it ends? Really?
I clearly said I would be working on Wednesday. Although the details were blurry due to the shock and confusion yesterday, I distinctly remembered mentioning the part-time job.
Given the situation, maybe Kwon-oh didn’t remember at all that I said I was working today.
But that was shocking in its own way. Until now, he had never carelessly listened to or forgotten anything I said, no matter how trivial, so the empty alley before me was even more shocking.
Unable to let go of my lingering hope, I stubbornly looked around the alley a few more times.
However, the more I checked, the clearer it became that I was alone.
When I finally acknowledged that Kwon-oh really didn’t come to pick me up today, the disappointment that had been half-filled overflowed.
Tears that I had been holding back well until now welled up. My vision instantly became blurry.
If I could, I wanted to take back everything I said to Kwon-oh yesterday.
‘Okay. Even if it was unavoidable for you to say that to Sung-rok… about blind dates or whatever, you have no right to tell me to deny our relationship too.’
‘That’s my right.’
He must have been very angry and disappointed in me. Enough to turn around and leave just like that.
I know. I understand it intellectually, but I keep checking the dark alley in front of me and my silent phone.
If I had a brighter and more confident personality, I might have been able to contact Kwon-oh first, telling him I was hurt that he didn’t come to pick me up today.
If we had pretended like nothing was wrong, maybe the knot of tense emotions between us would have loosened bit by bit.
But even after fiddling with my phone for a long time, I couldn’t bring myself to call Kwon-oh in the end. Afraid that I might receive a firm rejection like yesterday.
In the end, I had to take the subway alone. Several times along the way, I swallowed my emotions, trying to suppress the tears that were welling up.
It painfully hit home that an irreparable, huge crack had formed between us.
I felt breathless from the frustration. The subway cutting through the city full of glittering lights felt especially cramped today. Every time the ground shook and swayed greatly, I felt nauseous as if seasick.
Unable to bear the choking pressure, I got off at the next station without thinking. Although there were still a few stops left to get home, I didn’t want to go back into the stuffy subway. So I decided to walk all the way home.
Not having walked alone for so long recently, I felt strange with every step I took.
I thought endlessly as I walked towards my apartment.
Whether to contact Kwon-oh again today or not.
Whether Kwon-oh would contact me or not.
Whether Kwon-oh’s anger had subsided or not.
No matter how many times I repeated the same questions like a broken record, there were no clear answers. I sighed.
“Ah, I don’t know.”
As I walked with dragging steps, I found myself entering a bustling area where shop signs shone brightly.
Although the sun had completely set, the sounds of people laughing and chattering mixed with the night air that still carried a faint mugginess.
The people out on the streets all looked happy. Their brightly smiling faces, flushed with joy, felt so distant, as if they were in a different world from me. I walked slowly, glancing at them from the corner of my eye.
“Ah, I’m feeling the alcohol today.”
Then I encountered a group gathered in front of a commercial building. The faces weren’t unfamiliar.
I stopped walking and carefully observed them, as if on guard.
“If it was going to be like this, I should have dressed up more. Let’s go to a used clothing store.”
“What’s with this confidence?”
Choi Kyung-won was among the people gathered in a circle, giggling.
I quickly hid behind a nearby signboard.
No wonder the faces looked familiar, they were business administration students.
It’s fortunate I spotted them early. If I had kept walking absentmindedly without really looking, I would have been inevitably caught by Kyung-won.
If we ran into each other in a place like this, I’d be stuck for at least ten minutes. It’s always troublesome, but on a day like today, I really wanted to avoid such a coincidence.
While contemplating which way to detour, I kept watching the group of business students.
“Is everyone out?”
“Joo Kwon-oh is still inside.”
I flinched involuntarily when Kwon-oh’s name was mentioned.
“Why is that bastard so slow?”
“He’ll come out on his own.”
I had a feeling when I saw Kyung-won… So he really was here.
I forgot that I was about to turn around and run away, and froze in an awkward position behind the signboard.
“Ah, there he comes. Hurry up, will you?”
“What? Is everyone out already?”
“Yeah. We’re going for round two.”
“Where are we going?”
“Wait, are we going with just this group? Let’s call more people. Bakjun said his academy just finished.”
“Bakjun? Oh oh. Good.”
“Should we call him?”
“Yeah.”
“Go ahead.”
Kwon-oh, standing among his friends, nodded as he gave the last reply. From my position, I could only see his back, so I couldn’t tell what expression he was making.
