I don’t know much else, but I’m certain of one thing—Bae Jung-yoon bears no ill will toward me. Hasn’t that always been clear from the way he’s acted?
Even when I got hurt because of him, not once did Bae Jung-yoon get annoyed. He only ever treated me with tenderness and care.
The truth is, the only time he’s ever acted strangely was in front of Choi Joo-won. And when I retrace the moment he snapped, it’s not like I can’t understand it at all.
“I told you, didn’t I? I don’t care about much, but I hate it when people mess with what’s mine.”
If Choi Joo-won hadn’t provoked him that day, none of it would’ve happened. When you really think about it, it was Choi Joo-won who started the whole mess.
So maybe I should be grateful to Bae Jung-yoon instead. After all, he protected me from Choi Joo-won. Sure, he may have overreacted a bit, but still.
Depending on what angle you look at it from, your perspective can shift. That’s why I keep wavering like this. The line between right and wrong is just so damn vague.
Maybe I’m trying to spin this in a way that benefits me, to justify the kind of person Bae Jung-yoon is. It’s easier to carry the emotional weight if I believe what he did was right. That way, I can keep living with him in peace.
Even if this is just rationalizing—it doesn’t matter. I’m doing the best I can to make a logical judgment. In my current condition, with my body like this, I need his help. It’s not like there’s any reason to distance myself from him anyway.
I’ve realized that there’s a side to Bae Jung-yoon I hadn’t seen before, but he hasn’t actually harmed me. All he did was stop Choi Joo-won, who was trying to hurt me—and in doing so, his hidden side came out.
After a lot of thought, Go Hoon made a decision. He had to accept that Bae Jung-yoon wasn’t someone to be taken lightly, and that it was best not to get on his bad side. As long as he kept that in mind, they should be able to live together peacefully, just as they had been so far.
Besides, Bae Jung-yoon had always been incredibly gentle toward “Kkongddeok-i.” That fact alone gave him some peace of mind. So, with a slightly different mindset than before, Go Hoon continued their cohabitation.
He maintained just the right amount of distance—not too casual, not too withdrawn. As long as he didn’t cross any lines, things continued to go smoothly.
And just as expected, the longer he spent under the same roof with Bae Jung-yoon, the more the memory of that brutal scene began to blur in his mind.
Forgetfulness dulls your sense of caution over time. Slowly, Go Hoon’s guard toward Bae Jung-yoon faded. But that didn’t mean the memory had been completely buried.
Go Hoon still had dreams sometimes. And the people in them were always the same. First, Choi Joo-won would appear. Then, inevitably, Bae Jung-yoon.
The same scene would repeat over and over again—those vicious kicks flying at him, and then Bae Jung-yoon’s one-sided beating of Choi Joo-won.
“…Bae Jung-yoon.”
And as he watched that scene unfold, his own mouth would suddenly speak the name—not in a cat’s voice, but in the voice of a human.
Jung-yoon, who had been silently looking down at the bleeding Choi Joo-won, would slowly turn his head, his face expressionless. That chilling gaze would land squarely on him.
Everything would go white in his mind, and his body would freeze. As if his lungs had seized up, he’d part his lips slightly and breathe out slowly.
The dark red blood pooling on Bae Jung-yoon’s fingertips would drip to the floor. Drip, drip. The sound of blood splattering would fill the living room. After standing still for what felt like forever, he would start striding toward him.
He would stop right in front of Go Hoon and blink those pitch-black eyes, then reach out with a bloodstained hand. And Go Hoon would open his eyes wide in terror, breath caught, his throat constricted by that massive hand.
Jung-yoon’s calm, symmetrical face would move in close.
“Who are you?”
That low whisper would slip into his ears. Those gleaming eyes would stare right into his, and then he’d flash a lazy, twisted smile.
“You’re not the Kkongddeok-i I know.”
And just as those muttered words reached him, the overwhelming loss of air would jolt Go Hoon awake, his eyes flying open.
Pale light seeped through the blackout curtains, stretching all the way to the bed. Birds chirped outside. Morning had already come.
He’d lost count of how many times he’d had that dream.
Ugh, fuck. Why the hell do I keep having this kind of dream?
Go Hoon let out a long, heavy sigh and stirred in bed.
“…Did Kkongddeok-i have a nightmare?”
Maybe it was the movement, but a sleepy, groggy voice came from above his head.
“Waaahhh—”
I’m having nightmares because of you. This is your fault, you bastard.
A wave of frustration welled up inside him. He let out a disgruntled noise and tried to pull away from Bae Jung-yoon. But the moment he started to sit up, thick arms wrapped around him and pulled him back in.
“I’m right here next to you, so it’s okay… Just sleep a little more with me.”
Jung-yoon whispered low, then raised a large hand to cradle the back of Go Hoon’s head.
Thump. Thump. He could hear the heavy beat of Jung-yoon’s heart. Go Hoon’s own frantic heartbeat gradually slowed to match that calm rhythm.
Fear and comfort. Two conflicting emotions swirled inside him as he stared at Bae Jung-yoon, whose face was clearly visible even in the dark.
Still half-asleep, Jung-yoon closed his eyes gently and continued to stroke him. His hand moved slowly down Go Hoon’s back, and eventually even gave his butt a light pat.
The irony wasn’t lost on him. How could he be comforted by the very person who haunted his nightmares? And yet, here he was, wrapped in his warmth, feeling strangely at ease.
But maybe that was only because Bae Jung-yoon still believed him to be “Kkongddeok-i,” the cat. If he were to become human again, would Jung-yoon still treat him the same way? He couldn’t be sure.
No. He was sure.
Bae Jung-yoon wouldn’t. That was something he just knew—instinctively.
Maybe it was the weight of that intense gaze—Bae Jung-yoon slowly opened his eyes. He stared into Go Hoon’s wide, dilated pupils in the dark, then let out a soft laugh and brushed his thumb across Go Hoon’s forehead.
“Why are you looking at me like that?”
The icy stare from the dream was nowhere to be found—only warmth poured from his eyes now.
“Meow~.”
Go Hoon let out a low mewl and nuzzled into that warm palm.
“You can’t just suddenly disappear on me, okay?”
Those words, ones Bae Jung-yoon had once said as if making a plea, echoed in his mind, and Go Hoon had a sudden thought.
What if… what if, when he eventually returned to his human form and vanished from Jung-yoon’s life, Jung-yoon went searching high and low for Kkongddeok-i? And what if, by some chance, Jung-yoon found out that the human Go Hoon had been his beloved Kkongddeok all along?
The very moment that scenario played out in his head, the image of Jung-yoon strangling him—clear as day—flashed before his eyes.
Go Hoon shuddered and shook his head. That kind of grotesque fantasy had to stop. There’s no way something so ridiculous could actually happen, right?
Yeah. No point in worrying over nonsense. Just sleep a bit more. After that nightmare, it doesn’t even feel like he got any rest. Cradled by Jung-yoon’s gentle touch, Go Hoon shut his eyes tightly.
***
It took about a month for the fracture in his hind leg to fully heal.
While the cast was on, Go Hoon had to minimize movement. That meant he was essentially confined to the bedroom, relying entirely on Bae Jung-yoon. Not that Jung-yoon minded—in fact, he doted on him with overwhelming care.
And finally, the long-awaited day came to remove the cast. The moment the bandages binding his hind leg were gone, he felt a wave of relief wash over him.
As Go Hoon moved around slightly to test his range, the veterinarian turned to Bae Jung-yoon and gave a series of warnings. The bone had mended well, but he stressed repeatedly that they still had to be careful—not to let the cat jump from high places or exert his leg too much, at least for the time being.
As soon as they returned home, Go Hoon was subjected to hand-washing by Bae Jung-yoon, who insisted his fur had gotten grimy. All the grooming he’d done in the car felt like a waste, but he had to admit—he did feel fresher afterward.
That night, Jung-yoon gave him a leg massage. He placed a warm towel on Go Hoon’s bare, hairless leg and gently pressed down to soothe the stiff muscles.
There was some pain, but it was tolerable—so Go Hoon stayed still and let it happen. Watching Jung-yoon concentrate, checking his reactions between each touch, stirred a strange feeling inside him.
The same hands that had once destroyed someone without hesitation were now touching him with infinite care. That contrast sometimes made his chest tighten—but he didn’t push Jung-yoon away.
Over the month spent in that cast, Go Hoon had become certain of something. When it came to him, Bae Jung-yoon was unfailingly kind.
The next morning—and again in the evening—Jung-yoon gave him another massage, just like before. And the day after that. And the day after that. Two weeks passed in that same rhythm.
“Bae Kkongddeok.”
At the sound of his name, Go Hoon turned to see Bae Jung-yoon beckoning him over.
“Come here. Let’s check your weight.”
“Meow.”
Go Hoon stretched luxuriously as he stood up from the cat wheel he’d been sprawled out on. That oversized treadmill in the corner of the living room had originally been bought for Kkongddeok’s rehabilitation—but these days, it was mostly used as a bed.
When Go Hoon approached, Jung-yoon scooped him up and stepped onto the scale with him. He wondered why they were suddenly checking his weight, but being held like this was no big deal, so he didn’t resist.
“Definitely over 2kg now… You’ve gained a bit.”
Hearing that muttered comment made Go Hoon flinch. Honestly, he had already noticed himself feeling heavier during the time in the cast.
Surely he wasn’t planning to put him on a diet, was he? That concern crept in, but Jung-yoon just hummed quietly, saying nothing more. Then he picked up his phone and disappeared into his room.
Must be making a personal call or something, Go Hoon figured, not paying it much mind. He climbed to the very top of the cat tower and leisurely admired the sky, now turning a deep crimson as the sun set.
A few minutes later, the sound of the door opening reached his ears.
Jung-yoon walked over to him, where he lay stretched out by the window. A large hand ran down from the top of his head to the small of his back. The lazy affection in that touch made Go Hoon purr before he realized it.
“Kkongddeok, we’ve got to go to the clinic tomorrow.”
Looking him straight in the eyes, Bae Jung-yoon continued in a calm, gentle voice.
Go Hoon blinked slowly and gazed back. The clinic? Was he going to check on the leg again? Or maybe it was time for vaccinations?
Taking care of a pet really was a lot of work. Every time they went to the vet, it seemed to cost at least a few hundred bucks. Honestly, this was probably the most anyone had ever spent on his behalf, hospital-wise, in his entire life.
That’s as far as his thoughts went—and he remained relaxed.
“Once we neuter you, this’ll be gone too, huh?”
…Right up until Bae Jung-yoon tapped him on his prominent, very male symbol.
