114
I Won’t Let This Go!
I heard birds chirping.
It would have been nice if it was a pretty sound like “chirp chirp chirp,” but it sounded almost like a boiling train furnace. I jumped up startled and saw several birds sitting on the balcony, all collaboratively screaming. Wow, how can such tiny things make such loud noises? Are you secretly carrying speakers? Or did you swallow cicadas?
We had quite passionate sex yesterday too. And unlike me who was reduced to a rag, Sebastian was reading a newspaper beside me, elegant like a nobleman from a movie. Every time I see him, I’m surprised that there are people who read paper newspapers at home rather than on airplanes.
“Did you have a bad dream?”
Sebastian put down his newspaper, came over and asked me. A gentle hand landed on my forehead.
“Yeah.”
Yes, it can only be described as a bad dream. Sebastian climbed onto the bed and gave me his arm as a pillow. I clung to him tightly and placed my lips on his neck, sucking. I was about to leave a hickey but restrained myself. Sebastian has had quite a lot of people to meet lately.
“What kind of dream was it?”
How should I describe it? A nightmare?
Sebastian’s body smelled like a forest. He uses various perfumes, but when I ask him about them and try spraying them on myself, the same scent doesn’t come from my body. Perhaps it’s because our body scents are different.
I just woke up, but he’s already in perfect attire, even with perfume on. I don’t understand why this wealthy heir is so diligent. Can’t you relax a bit? Because he’s like this, I feel pressured to get up every morning, dress neatly, and have a full day, even though I’ve just retired and should be enjoying an unemployed life. Despite Sebastian never telling me to do anything.
“I was dying.”
“Why such a dream…”
Sebastian grumbled. But he held my body more firmly.
“You appeared. Although there was nothing similar to you… thinking about it now, it somehow seemed like you. It was an Asian person with long black hair. Somehow… they looked like someone from a very long time ago. They were sitting wearing those flowing clothes you used to wear in the past.”
Maybe they looked more sorrowful because it was a moonlit night. I fumbled to gather the remaining images in my mind. But the dream was already flying away as soon as I woke up. Amid the fading memories, one thing came to mind.
“When I said I was disloyal, you…”
Did you cry? Were you upset? Did you scream? I can’t remember exactly. What did you do? The dream images disappeared instantly—
“AAAAARGH!”
Sebastian screamed irritably. Startled, I raised my head from his embrace, and he was getting up.
“AARGH! I feel like I’m having PTSD!”
Sebastian suffered in pain, saying, “Shit, disloyalty! That damn disloyalty! I remembered it!” Suddenly abandoned, I blinked dumbly while he screamed, shaking his entire body as if on fire.
I don’t understand why he’s screaming. But he left the room, shuddering with disgust. As a bonus, he screamed “Aaaaargh!” once more as he left.
Though it’s not my place to say, these words escaped my mouth unconsciously.
“Have I been a bad influence?”
This elegant guy seems to be becoming more like me, or is that just my imagination?
Nakaban stared at me.
“Mr. Riegel has gone to lie down, saying ‘past trauma has resurfaced.’ Do you know anything about that?”
Papers were scattered in front of Nakaban. It seemed like all those documents were at a standstill because Sebastian was gone. I immediately realized this was a moment when I needed to speak carefully. Everyone thinks I’m insensitive! And to some extent that’s true! But I’ve navigated the civil service world. I have at least this much awareness.
“I don’t know anything.”
“Really? He said he was going to wake up Schnieke, then immediately said his trauma had resurfaced. Are you sure you don’t know anything?”
“I really don’t know, not at all.”
I don’t know and I shouldn’t know. Otherwise, Nakaban’s anger would be directed at me, and I don’t think I have the ability to handle the anger of such a smart person. Ha, I can fight with butcher-like bastards as much as you want. But such elegant people are too intimidating. I completely denied any knowledge.
Nakaban looked at me intently, then shook his head.
“What were the Security Bureau people thinking when they took Schnieke? They should have given him to the military instead.”
“That’s not possible. The Security Bureau and the military have a bad relationship, so how could they watch a talent like Schnieke increase the military’s value?”
Kouri, who was standing far away, said with a smile. He too had mountains of paperwork, but it was quite reasonable compared to Nakaban. Not that the amount of paperwork was reasonable, but that he maintained neatness while piling them up. The amount of paperwork looked similar.
“You have a lot of paperwork too, Mr. Kouri.”
“Well, the reason I could leave SARD in the first place was because of that damn Canaris. To safely part with SARD, the report has to be approved.”
“And we don’t know how many attempts it will take to get approved. Who knows what those old geezers are thinking?”
The second team member grumbled.
Ah, we’re all in the same boat. I had a heap of paperwork to process too. I had submitted my resignation, but the Security Bureau isn’t that easy. With so much work, you think you can just fly away alone? Who says so?! —For this reason, I also had to hand over my duties. I don’t know about other places, but the handover at Rotman Security Bureau roughly means “in all cases related to you, if we need you, you’ll absolutely show up.” Yes, yes. You ask how this happens in the 21st century? Well, it’s possible in Rotman. The UN doesn’t bash our country about human rights sensitivity for no reason.
Although Canaris has been caught, the aftermath still remains. In fact, all the tasks that were pushed back because Canaris hadn’t been caught have now been pushed right to our doorstep. With the omnipotent excuse “Canaris” gone, the government now has to solve everything.
There are things our side considers urgent. Issues like smuggling, the list of high-ranking officials connected to Canaris (and an enormous amount of work including what they did and the effects of their actions), the sources of money and information they had, and so on. These are urgent from the Security Bureau’s perspective.
But from the political world’s perspective, it’s different. The list of high-ranking officials is urgent for them too. If they’re implicated, they need to create excuses to escape. However, what’s most urgent for them is, surprisingly, maintaining the laws they pushed excessively while mentioning “Canaris” (for example, there’s the issue of the Security Bureau’s authority. We have post-warrants. Obviously not democratic. The UN and numerous civil organizations have always harassed us, but the shield we’ve used all along was Canaris), or aspects like providing minimal welfare while maintaining strong surveillance on citizens. Oh, and until now they’ve conducted fraudulent elections using Canaris as an excuse, but that’s no longer possible. In other words, the political landscape is about to change. So they’re also in chaos.
The obligation to inform the families of the deceased and the victims (narrowly speaking, those directly harmed by Canaris, but broadly speaking, the entire nation. Living in a country with random bomb terrorism for 20 years is painful) about the full story, and the work on the compensation they should have received will probably be pushed back. Will it all be processed within ten years? Presidential candidates will promise swift support for compensation work, but anyone who’s worked as a civil servant in Rotman for just one year would know that’s just talk.
Canaris must have had a lot of money, and it will all be recovered, but… money that’s not recorded in ledgers and can’t be traced just going into the national treasury? Our country’s people? That won’t happen. It will be torn apart and swallowed by various people, and then naturally, we’ll be left with the situation of having to help victims from the national budget without extra income. Where will that budget come from? Which institution will execute that budget? Now it’s a dirty mud fight. Everyone doesn’t want to execute the budget, so they’ll insult victims and try to clean up their act by building buildings or something elsewhere.
It’s a sad situation.
But I’m just a petty civil servant. No, now I’m not even a civil servant, just a petty citizen. There’s nothing I can do.
Just as I was thinking that, the phone rang. Phones ringing at times like this always give an ominous feeling. This must be because people view the world through their own perspective. In reality, phone rings probably always sound the same.
“Ah, Schnieke, phone.”
Nakaban sounded irritated, and I realized it was my phone.
“Sorry, sorry.”
I apologized in a not-so-sorry tone and as soon as I answered the phone, Dill’s voice boomed.
Where’s your boyfriend?!
The sound was just so loud.
Director Dill’s anger was palpable. Wow, I thought my eardrums would fall off. Instinctively, I held the phone away and shuddered. Meanwhile, Dill continued to shout.
Shit, is he challenging us now?! Does he think money can do everything? Did you think you’d be fine after turning the government into your enemy? With the entire government in an uproar, if numerous people lose their positions here, Riegel will go bankrupt too! Does this country look that easy to you?!
I thought Dill didn’t get angry easily, but it seems she has quite a temper. Anyway, it’s hard to respond when I’m being scolded without knowing what happened. Judging by “Riegel will go bankrupt,” something has happened that makes them want to bankrupt Riegel, and it seems she’s calling to declare war, saying she won’t let this go. But what happened? As I was blinking my eyes, Nakaban, who had approached without me noticing, held out the tablet he always carries.
On that tablet, quite unexpectedly, my father was holding a USB while dressed in his priest’s clothing.
“Here is a list of assets belonging to Matthias Yudorov, the leader of Canaris. After his exile, he ran a drug business in Urnan and Irika. He manufactured and supplied. His drugs spread to Europe and formed his personal assets and Canaris’s funds. After learning Matthias Yudorov’s identity, I tracked him.”
“Did you come to Irika to track him?”
A female reporter asked. I thought the face looked familiar—this reporter tried to interview me in Maderke. There was a caption at the bottom of the screen.
‘RBS Reporter Auer’
“That’s right. Sebastian Riegel, who had been kidnapped by Canaris, protected me and my sons. As you can see, there are many security guards. We traveled around Irika tracking Yudorov’s traces. I am confident that by tracking the flow of his business, most of Canaris’s funds can be recovered.”
“Has this data been provided to the police?”
“Ah, since the Rotman police are currently suffering from tremendous workload, we are organizing the information on our side. Various civil organizations are participating to ensure objective organization. If possible…”
My father’s interview continued. It was too obvious whose handiwork this was. I burst into laughter. As I laughed loudly, Dill hung up the phone in anger.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
