# Chapter 8
“What? Why did you laugh?”
Haeseung felt an absurd emotion as if Mugyeong’s smile was directly linked to his disadvantage. This feeling intensified because Mugyeong had erased his smile the moment their eyes met, as if destroying evidence.
“When did I? I wasn’t laughing.”
“You were.”
“You must have seen wrong.”
Mugyeong, who had already approached to within inches, replied with a smile. It was an ironic smile, as if only smiling could instill trust in his claim that he hadn’t been smiling. Mugyeong brushed off the snow that had settled on Haeseung’s bangs and walked ahead.
After returning to the guesthouse, changing out of their wet clothes, and resting briefly, the sky had already darkened to a navy blue. The two went to a sashimi restaurant where they asked the owner to prepare slices from plump red sea bream and rockfish they’d selected. Various seafood side dishes generously covered the table as service. Only after they had mindlessly filled their stomachs did they begin to hear the sound of waves. The fresh fishy smell also rushed into their nostrils. The shabby interior of the sashimi restaurant, the plastic plates filling the worn metal table, the warm heat emanating from the stained electric heater, and Mugyeong sitting across from Haeseung – Haeseung had a vague premonition that each of these would remain as precious memories difficult to forget for a lifetime.
Haeseung peeled a boiled quail egg and handed it to Mugyeong. Mugyeong looked alternately at the egg and Haeseung’s face with a questioning expression.
“Open your mouth.”
“Hey, there’s still so much shell stuck all over…”
Haeseung popped the quail egg into Mugyeong’s mouth. Mugyeong chewed and swallowed it thoroughly while keeping his eyes on Haeseung. The suspicious gaze, wondering about the motive behind this sudden service, was impressive.
“Kang Mugyeong. You were really scary earlier. During the snowball fight.”
“Were you scared?”
“My legs were trembling.”
Though it was frightening, he had laughed until his stomach hurt thanks to it. Their thick outer clothing meant getting hit with snow had little impact. Of course, it hurt when hit in the face, but unlike Haeseung who viciously aimed only for the face, Mugyeong rarely targeted the face.
Mugyeong asked the owner for spicy fish stew and smacked his lips slightly with a regretful expression.
“I’d like a drink of soju.”
“Should we go back to our room? If we borrow a burner, we can eat the stew in our room too.”
“I’ll ask.”
Mugyeong made Haeseung, who was about to stand up, sit back down.
As if this was a common request, the owner gladly lent them a burner and offered to bring the spicy stew to their room. The two warmed themselves under the warm blankets until the owner arrived with the stew.
“Do you think the owner noticed we’re minors?”
“He must have figured it out ages ago.”
Knock, knock. There was a knock at the door. Mugyeong quickly jumped out from under the blanket and opened the door. The cramped window opposite the door rattled. Mugyeong received the spicy stew and placed it in the middle of the room. The smell of the stew instantly filled the small room.
“Drink moderately, you two.”
The owner left after dropping that comment. Mugyeong looked at Haeseung and shrugged.
“See? I told you.”
The two emptied their glasses while chatting warmly. The heated floor quickly brought on the effects of alcohol. They had no choice but to open the window, which helped considerably. Haeseung stood right by the window, deeply inhaling the outside air, but feeling a chill, he repeatedly complained of the cold and sat back down on the floor.
“Hey, Kang Mugyeong.”
“Yeah?”
“The two of us have been hanging out this boringly for, well, a full 15 years now.”
Haeseung was surprised by the indifferent pace of time even as he said it himself. In the year Haeseung turned five, Mugyeong had moved in next door. They ended up attending the same kindergarten and became as close as real brothers. When they first met, Haeseung, born in June, was taller than Mugyeong. That was the only period in Haeseung’s life when he was significantly taller than Mugyeong. Back then, Haeseung used to call Mugyeong “squirt,” and he clung to that nickname even after Mugyeong caught up to his height.
“You’re right. 15 years…”
“When did the squirt grow up like this? My goodness, drinking straight liquor.”
“Who are you calling squirt?”
Mugyeong scoffed as if Haeseung’s words were ridiculous. Haeseung continued without caring about Mugyeong’s reaction.
“Our squirt will go to college, get a girlfriend, and eventually get married someday. Right?”
“I think you’re drunk.”
“I’m not.”
“Being drunk isn’t wrong, but insisting you’re not drunk is a big mistake.”
Haeseung thought that maybe, as Mugyeong suggested, he really was drunk. Mugyeong, who had become famous overnight, recognized by everyone in the world. Mugyeong was also making an enormous amount of money. Just a few days ago, he filmed yet another TV commercial. He drives, which Haeseung can’t do, and he drives an imported car worth several domestic mid-size cars, which Haeseung couldn’t even dream of. But regardless of his visible achievements, Mugyeong’s inner self hadn’t changed at all. The problem was Haeseung himself. A small fear of gradually losing the familiar Mugyeong had changed Haeseung. Haeseung found his own unfamiliarity with Mugyeong strange.
“Kang Mugyeong. What I want to say is… don’t change too quickly. I’d like you to give me time to adapt slowly.”
“You’re going to cry at this rate. If you not only get drunk but also cry, I’ll never drink with you again.”
Haeseung was about to protest that he wasn’t drunk, but fearing he might appear even more intoxicated, he stopped and checked the time instead.
“Do you know we’ll be twenty years old in just an hour?”
“I didn’t know. That feels awesome.”
“Don’t be sarcastic.”
“I’m not being sarcastic. I’m genuinely happy.”
“Then tell me. What makes you so happy?”
Mugyeong seemed to be choosing his words, falling into thought for a moment before slowly speaking.
“I was thinking about what the last day of being twenty would be like. I don’t think turning twenty-one will be as joyful as today. What I’m saying is that getting older won’t always be a good thing. That’s why this moment is more special. Being able to turn twenty with you…”
“…”
“I like it.”
The sound of waves lingering in his ears, the cooled spicy fishy smell, the warm floor heating his buttocks, the cold wind coming through the open window touching his nape, the fluorescent light scattering as it hit floating dust, and Mugyeong’s utterly serious face. Haeseung could be certain. That today, this very moment, would be difficult to forget for a lifetime. It was a peaceful moment that someone anticipating change, vaguely sensing it, desperately wanted to engrave in memory.
***
After taking turns washing up, Haeseung and Mugyeong lay down on the bedding. The floor remained tirelessly warm. Perhaps because his body was hot, Haeseung couldn’t easily fall asleep. But opening the window would make his nose cold, and worrying about catching a cold would make it even harder to sleep. Haeseung blankly stared at the dark ceiling without glow-in-the-dark stars with unfamiliar eyes, then tossed and turned.
“Go to sleep already.”
Mugyeong’s splendid voice, seemingly about to melt, resonated deeply. Mugyeong’s voice change had come during his first year of high school, later than Haeseung’s. Haeseung’s voice had broken in the third year of middle school, almost a full year earlier than Mugyeong’s. Whenever Haeseung, going through his voice change, had his voice crack every third sentence and made an embarrassed expression, Mugyeong would laugh so hard his uvula showed. As these incidents continued, Haeseung gradually spoke less and eventually started deliberately avoiding Mugyeong. He couldn’t stand Mugyeong making fun of his strange voice.
“I can’t sleep.”
“Try to make an effort.”
It was probably around that time. When Mugyeong suddenly ran away from home. Although he returned after just two days, Mugyeong’s escape was a bizarre event that would remain long in memory, as he had never caused any trouble before. The shock Haeseung experienced at that time was tremendous. Though Mugyeong probably had no idea, Haeseung had cried while waiting for Mugyeong to return. It was his first terror of possibly losing Mugyeong.
“Kang Mugyeong.”
“What?”
“I’ve been wondering something for a long time.”
“…What is it?”
“When we were in our third year of middle school, you ran away from home for two days. Where did you go?”
Mugyeong was silent for a long time. Just as Haeseung was about to give up on getting an answer, Mugyeong’s voice flowed out.
“You know you’ve asked that question more than ten times, right?”
“Because you haven’t answered it more than ten times.”
“If you had asked why I ran away instead of where I went, I would have answered.”
“Bullshit.”
“…”
“So why did you run away?”
“I can’t remember.”
Haeseung was dumbfounded. What kind of grand secret was it that he kept baiting people like this? He vowed never to ask again, if only out of disgust and pettiness. Haeseung deliberately let out a big sigh and rustled as he turned his back, intending to show his hurt feelings. There was no need for lengthy explanations like “I didn’t expect that” or “I’m disappointed.” The effect came quickly. Mugyeong tapped Haeseung’s back.
“Don’t touch me. I’m going to sleep.”
“I just remembered.”
On one hand, Haeseung was reluctant to turn around after taking the bait, but fearing that this hard-won opportunity might slip away, he demonstrated just how devious a person could be by grinning like a fool. Twisting his waist to adjust his position to the opposite side, he vaguely caught sight of Mugyeong’s profile.
“I hope you remember in detail. Without missing anything.”
“Wait. It’s confusing.”
“What’s confusing about it? You’re only going to tell the truth, right?”
“Are you doubting me now?”
“You misunderstood me. I was saying that I trust you. I’ll speak clearly from now on so you won’t misunderstand.”
“Be careful in the future.”
Haeseung felt annoyed but kept his mouth shut. Regardless of what anyone might say, Mugyeong was the one holding the card that could solve Haeseung’s long-standing curiosity. After clearing his throat and drawing out the suspense, Mugyeong slowly began to speak.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
