# Chapter 4
“Kang Mugyeong.”
“…What?”
“Since we’re friends, I’ll be honest.”
“About what?”
“I can’t do it lately.”
“Do what?”
“…Self-comfort, you know.”
Mugyeong looked at Haeseung with a bewildered expression, then his face showed understanding as he carefully studied Haeseung’s crotch area. Haeseung let out a deep sigh.
“…Since when?”
“Since that standee of yours came into my room. Before the college entrance exam, I thought it was just exam stress, but I tried after the exam ended and still failed.”
“That’s serious.”
“Do I need to see a doctor?”
“Is it because you feel like I’m watching you and it makes you embarrassed?”
“Less embarrassment and more like your face is right there…”
Haeseung’s voice trailed off. He had told Mugyeong that the standee was just a standee and Mugyeong was Mugyeong, but upon reflection, he belatedly realized he was the one who had been identifying the standee with Mugyeong more than anyone else.
“Were you thinking of me?”
There was an excited tone and a strange urgency in Mugyeong’s voice that made Haeseung suspicious. While he struggled to form a response, Mugyeong, who had been staring intensely at Haeseung, began to lean forward until his face was almost touching Haeseung’s.
“Hey, what are you doing?”
“Nothing, they say good things should be seen up close.”
“What?”
When Haeseung sharply questioned him, Mugyeong slowly backed away. Haeseung pretended not to notice Mugyeong’s flushed face and the predatory look in his eyes. He wasn’t sure how to handle Mugyeong’s intense teasing. Haeseung cleared his throat.
“Anyway, if you understand, let it go.”
But Mugyeong didn’t seem ready to let it go, as he continued to stare at Haeseung with a hardened expression. Or perhaps he was lost in completely different thoughts that Haeseung could hardly guess. Mugyeong’s expression seemed that foreign to him. Haeseung wanted to prevent Mugyeong’s thoughts from deepening further, an instinct he wasn’t consciously aware of. Haeseung carefully tapped Mugyeong’s thigh with his fingertips.
“Kang Mugyeong.”
“Yeah.”
“I’m sorry.”
“…”
“…Should we go watch the sunrise?”
“Just the two of us?”
The strange expression had already disappeared from Mugyeong’s face as he asked.
“Yes. Just the two of us.”
Without replying, Mugyeong picked up his wooden chopsticks again. Perhaps to hide his upturned lips, he began earnestly transferring sweet and sour pork into his mouth. Haeseung also started eating with a faint smile.
***
Awakened by his alarm, Mugyeong did some light stretching before hiding a palm-sized frame that lay neatly beside his pillow in the closet. Inside the frame was Haeseung’s photo, making it something that absolutely shouldn’t be discovered by anyone, especially Haeseung himself. Though Haeseung would never suddenly barge into his room, Mugyeong diligently hid the frame every day, preparing for even the slightest possibility.
After showering and putting on his school uniform, Mugyeong sent Haeseung a text message to come downstairs and left the house. Although the college entrance exam had ended two weeks ago, they still had to attend school regularly to fulfill attendance requirements. For Mugyeong, most days involved merely checking in for attendance and then leaving early due to training schedules. But except for special cases like Mugyeong, everyone else had to stay until the end of seventh period, with the excuse that they shouldn’t disrupt the study atmosphere for their juniors. Of course, behind this lay the school’s true purpose of preventing post-exam delinquency.
After waiting about three minutes in front of the house, Haeseung walked out looking half-awake. Particularly sensitive to the cold, Haeseung had put on a thick padded jacket over his uniform and zipped it up to his chin. Inside Haeseung’s bag, there were probably two or three wuxia novels he planned to read at school today.
“Sleepy?”
Haeseung shook his head at Mugyeong’s question.
“The cold woke me up completely. Aren’t you cold? Why do you always expose your neck like that? What if you catch a cold?”
“I’m fine.”
“What time do you have to go to training?”
“I can go after lunch. Let’s play some Go-Stop with the guys this morning.”
“I was going to read.”
“I brought plenty of betting money today.”
“Then I’ll play Go-Stop. I can read in the afternoon.”
Mugyeong was what gamblers would call an easy mark, while Haeseung was a card shark. But there was one fact Haeseung hadn’t noticed: Mugyeong only ever lost money to him. If by chance Haeseung lost the money he had won from Mugyeong to other guys, Mugyeong would doggedly win it back only to lose it to Haeseung again, creating an unnatural flow of self-serving stakes.
As they approached the subway station, Mugyeong took out a mask and put it on. Since more people had started recognizing him and asking for autographs or photos, masks had become essential items when going out. Seeing this, Haeseung mocked him, asking if he had caught the celebrity disease, but that was only because he didn’t know the full story. In Mugyeong’s judgment, not wearing a mask would actually be closer to celebrity disease symptoms. At least then he could fully flaunt his popularity to Haeseung.
“Didn’t your fame fizzle out?”
As if on cue, Haeseung sneered at Mugyeong, who now had only his eyes exposed.
“Should we test if it has?”
Mugyeong made a gesture as if to remove his mask.
“Don’t. You’ll just get hurt. I like seeing you confident. It’s occasionally excessive, but not to the point where it bothers me.”
While Haeseung was fussing over concerns that weren’t necessary, the subway arrived with a loud noise. As usual during rush hour, the subway was packed. The more crowded the subway was, the more Haeseung would press his body against Mugyeong’s, which was an absolute gain from Mugyeong’s perspective. Sure enough, today too Haeseung pressed close to him. Though it happened every time, Mugyeong always found it thrilling. Haeseung’s breath touched his neck. Mugyeong felt like he would go crazy with joy.
“Lee Haeseung, did you wash your hair?”
“I washed it this morning. Why? Does it smell?”
“No.”
“What’s with you? Why are you picking a fight so early in the morning?”
He had to pick a fight, or else he felt like he would lose his mind and bury his nose in the crown of Haeseung’s head. After graduating high school, he would no longer be able to smell the shampoo fragrance from Haeseung’s hair up close every day. That fact made Mugyeong sad. While he looked forward to the freedom of turning twenty soon, that freedom would also come to Haeseung equally, and the freedom Haeseung would gain was inevitably frightening.
Mugyeong had always found it difficult to deal with girls, and they found him intimidating as well. But Haeseung was different. Since kindergarten, Haeseung had been particularly popular with girls. Was it because of his slender, fair, and delicate appearance? Everyone easily let down their guard and wariness of the opposite sex in front of Haeseung.
The two got off at the subway station in front of their school and started walking toward it. As they walked, they spotted a man smoking ahead of them, so Mugyeong naturally guided Haeseung to the side without smoke. They quickened their pace slightly to pass the smoking man.
“Do you have something on your mind lately?”
Haeseung suddenly asked when their walking pace had returned to normal.
“Something on my mind? Why?”
“Just, your expression seems dark, and you’re talking less.”
“Was I?”
“Wait, your shoelace.”
Haeseung suddenly stopped and crouched down in front of Mugyeong’s feet. Mugyeong quietly looked down at the round back of Haeseung’s head as he tightly tied his sneaker laces.
“I like someone.”
Haeseung looked up at Mugyeong, still in the position of tying his shoelaces, just raising his head. His face showed surprise. If he knew who it was, he’d be even more surprised. Though Mugyeong wanted to see that more surprised face, he didn’t want to shock him yet.
“Who is it?”
Haeseung asked in a voice that couldn’t hide his curiosity and excitement as he stood up.
“I can’t say yet.”
“Why?”
“If I could say it, it wouldn’t be a worry.”
“What kind of answer is that?”
Haeseung burst into a small laugh as if finding it absurd.
The two arrived at school just barely avoiding being late. The third-year classroom was chaotic. Given the situation, it was only natural that teachers of first and second years were constantly issuing warnings. Even within that chaos, there were various groups: those absorbed in smartphone games all day, those sleeping, those chatting, those reading books, those watching movies, and those gambling. As far as Mugyeong knew, Haeseung seemed to spend his time at school doing almost everything except smartphone games.
As an analog game, Go-Stop wasn’t particularly popular, but they still quickly gathered enough players. Since the homeroom teacher could barge in at any moment, they used desks as a fortress and spread a blanket on the floor, with four players occupying each corner of the blanket, huddled together. They were busy dealing the cards.
“Let’s pick who goes first. Night low, day high!” (In card games, a method of deciding who goes first by each drawing a card; at night the person with the lowest card goes first, during the day the highest.)
“I go first.”
One guy said, showing the “crap light” card. The one who got to go first shuffled the cards, and Haeseung, sitting to the left of the first player, cut the shuffled deck. The cards were dealt around.
“Damn, I got terrible cards! I want to fold.”
Haeseung lamented, declaring his surrender. The first player sharply flashed his eyes and stopped him.
“Lee Haeseung. You’ve won twice in a row, so you can’t fold this time.”
Forced to join the game due to the mandatory defense rule, Haeseung made a face like he’d eaten something bitter. Since he was the one who cut the deck, he couldn’t blame anyone else. Perhaps he’d forgotten his personal ritual of blowing on the cards for luck before cutting them. Somehow, he had an ominous feeling that he would lose big this round, and it made him anxious.
When Mugyeong said he would play, the player in last place grinned broadly as he collected the light card value.
The player who went first quickly picked up the crap light card from the cards spread on the floor. Haeseung snorted.
“Hey, you should have eaten the double animal. Are you showing off being a newbie by eating the light card?”
“I like light cards. If you have three smart ones, it’s a sure win.”
The first player didn’t heed Haeseung’s advice. Mugyeong chimed in, waving the animal card in his hand.
“No retrieving discarded cards. I’ll enjoy eating this double animal card.”
“Kang Mugyeong. Don’t show your cards. It’s my turn, so you just sit there.”
But Haeseung had nothing to eat. No matter how much he stared at the cards in his hand and the cards on the floor, there was no perfect match. Well, there was exactly one. But his pride wouldn’t allow him to play a trash card to eat more trash (the rain light, unlike the rain double animal, doesn’t help score points). Eating those wouldn’t help at all, and he’d end up losing the rain light and rain double animal to the other players all at once. Haeseung had no choice but to discard the plain card. He even failed to pick up a card from the deck. At this rate, he might even lose to Mugyeong.
Lee Haeseung, you’re really getting crushed this round. Mugyeong thought to himself as he quietly observed Haeseung, whose distress was evident.
Go-Stop/Hwatu (Korean traditional card game)
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
