Chapter 118
Of the five auditions, I failed the two most recent ones at lightning speed. The first was due to a lack of preparation, auditioning after only one day without even memorizing the script. The second was immediately rejected on the spot because they hadn’t considered an Asian for the role.
From the third audition onwards, I had more time and prepared various things.
First, I created a brief document of my profile. My agency had already made a demo reel compiling scenes from movies I’d filmed. I took that and saved it on both a USB drive and my phone, and also uploaded it privately to a video platform.
I memorized scripts while walking and practiced acting sitting in parks. I was often mistaken for a strange person while lurking around audition venues.
I thought I had prepared quite diligently. That is, until I failed all five auditions.
I was told my acting was stiff, and there were also evaluations that my visual didn’t match the given role at all.
The worst critique came from a director named Hugo.
“Looking at your profile, it seems you were quite successful in Korea, but this is Hollywood. Even actors who are well-known in France, England, Japan, etc., aren’t guaranteed success here. This means your career in Korea isn’t significant here.”
I swear, I never boasted about my career in Korea. Rather, I was feeling discouraged after receiving poor evaluations in 4 auditions. Yet, Director Hugo said such things after checking my profile and demo reel.
I know they’re careful in selecting even supporting roles for blockbuster movies. The role I auditioned for was a significant supporting role.
Was that the reason I received such harsh words?
I was dumbfounded to be scolded before even showing my acting.
Normally, I wouldn’t tolerate such treatment. I’d either pour out a barrage of curses or storm out.
To be honest, I have a nasty temperament.
But Mitchell doesn’t know.
It’s a secret from Mitchell.
However, given my current situation, I tried incredibly hard to endure it. Unable to get angry, I forced a smile and tried to lighten the mood. I endured to the end and smiled even bigger. As if such adversity was nothing.
Then I was told not to be arrogant.
Just as I was thinking about pulling that bastard’s lips, Director Hugo dismissed me.
Shockingly, he didn’t even give me a chance to show my acting.
Leaving the audition with a blank face, I searched for Director Hugo and found evaluations saying he was a white supremacist with a severe sense of chosen people. But apparently, his rough speech and behavior could be overlooked because he was a genius director and a rising star or something.
“Isn’t he just good at cursing with no manners?”
Even foul-mouthed grandmothers running popular restaurants give extra service, but this was just cursing and telling me to get lost. There was no way I could feel good about it.
And so, I became an ordinary idiot.
What was the problem?
While there were unfair situations like with Director Hugo, I also failed other auditions that were conducted properly.
In the end, it was my fault for not appealing to them.
While I was running around alone, Mitchell’s film shooting was heading towards its end. I spent nights with Mitchell and moved for myself during the day.
“I came for a walk.”
I talked with Mitchell while looking at my messy script.
I went out for a walk again today. With a bag containing sandwiches and drinks, I wandered around feeling like I was on a daily picnic.
Reading scripts outdoors was effective. It was more refreshing than being at home, and because I was conscious of passersby, I had to act in a tense state. I practiced acting by refining and pushing this.
Since I hadn’t told Mitchell that I was practicing acting outside, he probably thinks I’m crazy about walking.
“When do you finish?”
– I think I’ll be done before 7, let’s have dinner together.
“Great!”
– What should I bring? Or do you want to eat out?
“Let’s eat out after a long time. How about beef lasagna, cream pasta, green onion pancake, and beer?”
Mitchell snorted at the strange combination of food. But it meant he was okay with it.
– Okay. Let’s do that.
“Oh! Then, I’m at the park near the El Capitan Theatre. Do you want to come this way later?”
– I’ll call you when I leave.
“Okay. Got it.”
After hanging up, I checked the time and it was 5:10 PM. It would be perfect to sit in the park reading the script for two hours and then have dinner with Mitchell.
Mitchell didn’t seem to mind much that I’ve been going out lately. After asking if I would continue walking, he didn’t seem to care whether I wandered outside all day or not. While I thought it was good, I also felt a bit disappointed deep down.
The person who used to dislike me going out and tried to confine me suddenly changed. It’s not like there’s a phone location tracking app or anything.
I messed up my hair to reflect my complicated feelings. Putting Mitchell aside for a moment, I turned my attention back to the script. After taking a deep breath, I read one line of dialogue.
“How can you talk to me when you hide your expression and don’t reveal your heart?”
Maybe because my mind was elsewhere, it didn’t sound as natural as reading a book. As I was reading the awkwardly delivered line again, someone stood in front of me.
“Tsk tsk, to act like that…”
A middle-aged man with sunglasses on his head looked down at me with a pitying expression. He shook his head and cursed right to my face.
It wasn’t a mumble. He was saying it for me to hear. He evaluated me while making direct eye contact.
I couldn’t help but look at the man with unfriendly eyes. Slightly lifting my black cap, I glared at the man and spat out the next line.
“If you want something, just say it honestly. Don’t act so ambiguously.”
I recited the line to fit my current situation. A bit of anger furrowed my brow, and an uncomfortable rage overlaid my eyes.
It wasn’t an emotion that matched the character. The tone that matched the dialogue should have been sly and sarcastic, but now I had completely changed the interpretation with an angry performance. It was because of the rude man.
“……”
Then the man’s eyebrows twitched as he looked at me, and he plopped down beside me. He observed my face from various angles with drowsy eyes.
He explored the color of my eyes and touched my skin with his gaze.
Moving his upper body, he looked at me from right, left, up, down, 45-degree angles, and so on. Like a dancing balloon figure, he shook his body and scrutinized every inch of me. Finally, he met my gaze as if determined to count every single one of my eyelashes. I was truly being observed.
“What are you doing?”
I lowered my cap further to hide my face. Since I still needed to see the strange man, I slightly turned my head to the side and lifted my chin.
Every time our eyes met, the man showed a grotesque smile.
“Your acting needs work, but your face is quite usable.”
While I could ignore the comment about my face, the remark about my acting needing work stuck with me. I wondered if he was in the same industry, but then I started to feel slightly annoyed about why I had to be evaluated by a stranger.
“By the way, where did you get that script?”
“…I bought it from a script website.”
“Hmm. Why did you buy it?”
“Because it’s interesting.”
“What’s interesting about a script that’s not even half complete? And one that’s been rejected everywhere as trash.”
“I didn’t know it was rejected. I just find that half interesting… But who are you?”
“Me? The person who wrote that script.”
Lifting my cap in surprise, I stared at the man in front of me.
“…Writer?”
“No. Director.”
The man seemed to find his own words amusing and chuckled to himself. I responded with a somewhat blank expression.
“Ah, I see. You’re the director…”
The man claiming to be the director didn’t look ordinary. The encounter itself was strange. To accidentally meet the writer and director of the script I was reading in a park. But could he be a scammer? No, he hasn’t mentioned money, so he’s probably not a scammer. There’s no reason for the director of this script to try to scam me anyway.
Recently, after failing auditions, I had been obtaining scripts for acting practice and studying them daily. I had prepared several scripts, and “Mirror Match” was one of my favorites to practice.
Although it was only half a script, I enjoyed it and had been practicing it consistently. It was quite fun to imagine and act out the missing latter half.
To think I’d meet the director who wrote the “Mirror Match” scenario here.
“Good atmosphere, good face, good voice.”
The director who had been observing me shared his impressions.
“You’re perfect for the role of Nathan in ‘Mirror Match’. Want to try it with me? I’m saying I’ll cast you. I’ll cast you!”
The director suddenly shouted and then burst into laughter. Before I could answer, he continued.
“But I don’t have money. I can’t make the movie.”
He laughed loudly, looking at the sky like a madman. As I watched him laugh like a lunatic, a thought suddenly struck me.
I know someone with a lot of money, don’t I? Not just a lot, but overflowing with money.
