When she stepped outside, bright light had halfway pushed its way into the lobby. As if she had just crossed into another world, Seoyoung felt strange in her own skin at that moment. It almost seemed like a dream. That’s how unbelievable it still was to have seen Sa Kangjun face to face.
I’ve blown it.
Seoyoung let out a hollow laugh as she opened the paper bag she had received from the male secretary. The item handed to her as a visitor’s gift was a fountain pen from a famous brand. Despite its considerable price, she didn’t feel good about it, probably due to her instinctive certainty that she had failed. After being flustered throughout and even stuttering, I wouldn’t hire myself either.
“Haah.”
Seoyoung let out a long sigh and bit her lip tightly. She had prepared diligently for a long time and practiced interviewing hundreds of times, but she froze the moment she faced Sa Kangjun. Her fragmented reason couldn’t recover in front of that unpredictable man. Perhaps the fear from that day was still controlling her.
How pathetic, really.
Seoyoung chided herself as she picked up her phone.
“Seoyoung-ah, you don’t have to come home.”
It was her mother. As always, after Sena made a fuss, her mother would leave messages to soothe Seoyoung.
“Don’t worry about what Sena says.”
“You living well is how you help Mom.”
I wish she would just scold me for being cold and unfeeling. Then it would be easier to decide what to do—either fight it out or turn my back on family completely. But with Mom approaching me like this, I can never refuse. I can’t ignore a mother who shows more consideration to the adopted Seoyoung than to her biological daughter Sena.
“I’ll come.”
Seoyoung sent her reply and turned around.
***
“I’ve checked Yoo Seoyoung-ssi’s background. It’s clean.”
So Yujung, who had just sent Seoyoung away, reported to Kangjun.
“I see.”
He looked again at Seoyoung’s profile displayed on the computer screen.
For someone just starting her career, she had some impressive experience and credentials listed. She had completed security training at the Ministry of Defense and had been on an overseas defense industry exhibition trip. Seeing that she had participated in military-corporate collaboration meetings, she seemed to have been recognized for her abilities by her previous boss. And why did she get so many certifications? In many ways, she appeared better than Shin Jihoon, who worked under So Yujung.
“She would do the job well if hired. However.”
“However?”
“She’s too pretty. As she gains seniority, she’ll frequently attend external schedules, and it’s not good if a secretary stands out too much.”
“Is that the problem, or are you worried I might hit on her?”
“Did that question bother you?”
“Would you have liked it if I had? Making me look like a potential pervert in front of people.”
“I misspoke out of boredom. Forget it.”
Though her tone was apologetic, her expression showed no sign of remorse. Does her face get thicker with years of service? Well, she was always like this, so what could I expect? Kangjun indifferently tapped on the desk.
“It’s a real mystery. Director So has a difficult personality too, so I don’t know how you managed to stay with my mother for so long without fighting.”
“We’re comrades-in-arms.”
So Yujung answered matter-of-factly, lifting her chin. Her answer carried many meanings. Comrades who rolled together in the harsh weapons market, comrades who raised the incredibly demanding him together. That’s why she sometimes tried to act motherly like now. If it were anyone else, he would have pushed them away long ago, but since there was nothing wrong with So Yujung’s words, he had to acknowledge it.
“Since a civilian like me should stay out of it, Director So, please handle this hiring matter as you see fit.”
“If that’s what you—”
Just as So Yujung was about to answer, her phone vibrated. After looking at the screen, she turned away to take the call.
“Yes, this is So Yujung.”
The fact that she was taking a call in front of the CEO suggested it was important. She would surely report appropriately. He looked at Seoyoung’s resume again. As So Yujung said, her appearance was indeed eye-catching. Just seeing the male interviewers’ eyes spinning when she entered the interview room made that clear.
Kangjun recalled Seoyoung who had been before him just moments ago. It was amusing to see her pretending to be calm while obviously tense, so he pushed her a bit. The image of her face and neck turning red, trembling as she bit her lip, came to his mind. The fine hair on her nape still looked soft and fluffy. What would it feel like to stick his cock into that natural opening that no man had ever entered, given that she’d never had a boyfriend? It wasn’t that he hadn’t thought about it. But it’s not like I’d actually pester her in the office like a dog in heat.
“I understand.”
So Yujung, who had ended the call, turned around. Her previously calm expression had darkened.
“CEO-nim, Jung Yongjin has confessed.”
“That’s good.”
“And then he died.”
At So Yujung’s words that followed, Kangjun looked up.
“Oh dear.”
He sighed and put the tablet down on the desk.
“Well, that’s fucking great.”
***
Her mother’s name was Park Inhye. Her father died in an accident as soon as Seoyoung was born, so she had no memory of him. Her mother raised Seoyoung while working at what seemed like a decent job. Even without a support network or inherited wealth, the mother and daughter’s life wasn’t particularly impoverished. Although her mother sometimes paid more attention to her occasionally changing boyfriends, she didn’t neglect Seoyoung. Until the day her mother woke the sleeping Seoyoung and fled with her in the night to a seaside village, the relationship between mother and daughter was lukewarm but not bad. Even just for that, Seoyoung couldn’t pretend not to know about her mother Inhye’s death.
The cause of her mother’s death was a gunshot wound to the chest. They said the head of the fishing village cooperative had accidentally found her, pushed back and forth by the waves until she caught on the breakwater. Concerned that young Seoyoung might be traumatized, the police didn’t let her see her mother. While giving her statement about that day’s circumstances, Seoyoung precisely mentioned Kangjun’s name.
“That day, someone came looking for Mom.”
“Who was it?”
“Sa Kangjun. Sa, Kang, Jun.”
Seoyoung enunciated the name that had been embroidered on his school uniform.
“Please. Please find him.”
She doesn’t know why she felt so desperate. The dominant thought was that he had killed her mother, but the possibility that he hadn’t never disappeared either. Kangjun was just a high school student then, wasn’t he? Of course, recalling the strange and chilling atmosphere she felt from him that day, it wasn’t impossible that he had held the gun himself.
Even if one of his subordinates had killed her, it would make no difference if it had been his order. Yet strangely, Seoyoung didn’t think he had killed her mother. This thought had remained within her throughout her life. Floundering in that tiny gap between suspicion and hatred, Seoyoung thought of Sa Kangjun. She wanted to confirm if he had really killed her mother.
In the end, the perpetrator was never caught. The waves had carried everything that happened that day far out to sea. After that, two years at her maternal grandmother’s house, then several years in an orphanage after her grandmother passed away. Living like that, she was fortunately adopted by the Jung-Sook couple who ran a childcare center. And she changed from Kim Seoyoung to Yoo Seoyoung.
“Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you… to our dear mother.”
The word “love” still feels awkward. Even though she’s been Park Jungsook’s daughter for seven years. Thankfully, thanks to Sena’s loud voice, Seoyoung’s silence went unnoticed.
Jungsook’s face brightened at her daughters’ song. After she blew out the candles, Seoyoung, who had finished the habitual applause, handed over the prepared envelope of money.
“Happy birthday, Mom.”
“You didn’t have to give me this. You should save the money you worked hard to earn.”
Jungsook accepted the envelope Seoyoung gave with an apologetic look. Seeing this, Sena cut in with a sullen expression.
“You never know how to buy gifts, always just handing over money envelopes? So thoughtless.”
“Why are you being spiteful again? To your sister.”
“We’re the same age, so what’s with ‘sister’? If she’s my sister, shouldn’t she come early to cook seaweed soup and stuff?”
“Then you should do it. Why are you only picking on Seoyoung?”
“Mom, why do you only talk to me like this? Honestly, the things she does are annoying. Has she ever willingly joined family gatherings since childhood? Does she ever do anything on her own initiative? This time too, if I hadn’t called, she would have forgotten and not come, right?”
Although she always found Seoyoung disagreeable, today she seemed particularly sharp-edged. On top of her bone-deep victim mentality that Seoyoung had uprooted this family’s foundation, seeing Seoyoung’s thick money envelope compared to her own bouquet of flowers must have finally made her horns sprout.
Seoyoung didn’t bother to respond. She was tired, and there was nothing to be gained anyway. Besides, she partly acknowledged the indifferent side of herself that Sena had mentioned.
After all, since 17 years ago, there had been no room for leisure in Seoyoung’s heart.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
