Chapter 56
His rut would come soon. As early as this evening, or tomorrow. He’d fall into a deep sleep the moment he injected the suppressant, so he needed to inform Park Hae-jung in advance.
In truth, there was no need to prepare injections. He could simply ask Kwon Si-yul’s permission and find another omega. It’s not like he hadn’t been with betas before, and most understood the nature of ruts. If some couldn’t accept it, he’d just end those relationships.
At first, he considered explaining to Si-yul. But he didn’t feel like it. Meeting someone else, mixing bodies with them – it all seemed bothersome.
Why?
He couldn’t tell if it was simply because he’d grown older and realized the futility, or if there was another reason.
His body felt languid. As he closed his eyes, feeling like he was sinking underwater, his phone rang, chasing away his drowsiness. Wondering if Si-yul had changed his mind and called, he picked up the phone. As soon as he answered, he heard a cheerful “Oppa!” It was his youngest sister, Woo Ji-hye.
“Oh. What’s up?”
Hiding his disappointment that it wasn’t who he’d hoped for, Woo Hyun-se answered as kindly as he could. In contrast, Ji-hye’s voice on the other end was full of excitement.
“I heard you met Seo-hee unni!”
“Where did you hear that?”
“Tae-joo told me, and unni too. That’s great. Are you having an engagement party soon?”
How did she always pick up news he hadn’t breathed a word about? At this rate, she’d hear about his child being born from others before him.
“We decided to skip that.”
“That’s a shame. It would be nice though. Exchanging rings, taking photos. And it would keep others from eyeing you.”
Despite growing up in this world, Ji-hye still retained a fairy-tale sensibility. Well, having been raised preciously in a gilded cage by the elders, she might not know about their dirty affairs. For some reason, Si-yul came to mind as a comparison, leaving a bitter taste in his mouth.
Si-yul, who fell alone into the world without any protectors, growing up alone, like a weed with a thin stem.
“Actually, I have a recital this month. I thought it would be nice if you and Seo-hee unni came together. I’ll send an invitation.”
“Do I have to go with… Seo-hee-ssi?”
“Of course! You must come that day. Tae-joo said he’s coming too.”
“Alright. I’ll clear my schedule.”
Going wasn’t difficult. Si-yul came to mind first. He wanted to go together, but Woo Gi-bbeum, that hyena, would be there too. He didn’t want to expose Si-yul to that drooling muzzle.
Though the conversation seemed over, Ji-hye hesitated. Only after he prodded her side with a “What is it?” did she spill it out.
“…Actually, I already told Seo-hee unni. I asked her to come with you. I sent her an invitation in advance.”
“Is this a notification?”
“I’m sorry. I ran into Seo-hee unni by chance before and it came up. I had the invitation with me, so I gave it to her early.”
Ji-hye apologized, laughing sheepishly as if there was no malice. Meanwhile, Hyun-se’s head throbbed. Why does everyone… He almost cursed. He reminded himself that the delicate princess on the other end might be sick for days if she heard a curse. Unlike Gi-bbeum, who would return curses tenfold, Ji-hye was like a thin glass plate that would shatter if touched.
“Okay.”
“Thank you, oppa.”
He ended the call early, using work as an excuse. His eyes throbbed, so he pressed them shut and tilted his head back. The smile he’d forced disappeared the moment the voice on the other end could no longer be heard.
He was tired.
He missed Si-yul. He wanted to hear Si-yul’s voice. He wanted to fall asleep holding Si-yul without thinking about anything. Binding those wriggling limbs and burying his face in that hollow neck. He wanted to lie there, making a nest of that gentle voice and sweet scent. Pressing those chattering lips to his cheek and tangling his fingers in that soft hair.
But the cold-hearted Si-yul ignored him and said he’d return to that cramped hostel. There was no Si-yul at home. He didn’t want to enter that empty house alone. Should he kidnap Si-yul on the way? How could he tie Si-yul to the house? He wanted to shackle those ankles or put him in a large birdcage.
He wished Si-yul would swim around the house like a goldfish in a tank. Whether intentionally or by chance, wearing clothes far too big for his frame like a sack, fluttering thin hems like fins, treading lightly on the floor with fair soles that showed no signs of hardship.
Had he ever felt like this before?
It was ridiculous to be swept up in such emotions when he wasn’t even in his tumultuous adolescence anymore. Hyun-se chuckled at himself. Perhaps his fever was too high, causing his rational thinking to fade and be replaced by madness.
* * *
Even before the last customer lifted their bottom from the chair, Si-yul hurried to start closing up. He felt urgent. He wanted to rush to Hyun-se right away, tell him about his manifestation, and get rid of those damn syringes from sight. He wanted to pound his chest and say there was no need to worry about ruts anymore, that he could handle it now.
But just as red lights seem to catch you more often when you’re in a hurry, today’s last customer seemed possessed by a snail spirit, dawdling with no sign of leaving.
He had deliberately told Hyun-se he’d stay at the hostel tonight. He’d even refused Hyun-se’s offer to pick him up, saying he was afraid Yuwon might see. The plan was to surprise Hyun-se, who wouldn’t be expecting him.
With his heart pounding, he was so focused on watching the customer’s back, wondering when they’d leave, that he didn’t notice Woo Tae-joo staring at him. When Tae-joo called “Hyung,” Si-yul jumped as if startled into the air.
“Do you have plans tonight?”
The restaurant closed at 2 AM. Normally, it would be unlikely to have plans at such an hour. Especially for Si-yul, whose social circle was narrower than a needle’s eye.
“No, it’s dawn when we finish. What plans could I have?”
Shaking his head, he wondered if his impatience had been that obvious. Just then, the customer started to leave, and Si-yul grabbed a rag. He ignored Tae-joo, who was narrowing his eyes suspiciously behind him.
Usually, he left with the other staff after locking up, but today he just wanted to hurry. Si-yul quickly finished his tasks and ducked into the changing room to change clothes.
“I’ll be heading out first.”
It was 20 minutes earlier than usual. Faster than Alice’s rabbit, Si-yul left the restaurant with his hood flapping. As he bounded down the stairs two or three at a time, Tae-joo, twice Alice’s size, chased after him like a shot. As soon as they exited the building, he grabbed Si-yul’s shoulder.
“Hyung, why are you in such a rush today?”
“Ah, I’m tired so I want to get home quickly.”
“That doesn’t seem like the real reason. Are you really not meeting someone?”
If he’d known Tae-joo would be this annoying, he would have lied about meeting a friend. Si-yul twisted his shoulder uncomfortably, slipping out of Tae-joo’s grasp. Truthfully, Tae-joo wasn’t even on his mind. He was already calling a taxi on his app.
“If you don’t have plans, can’t you stay with me for a bit? I won’t keep you long.”
“It’s difficult today. I need to get home early.”
“Just for a little while.”
Si-yul’s brow furrowed, wondering why Tae-joo was being so clingy. Still, not wanting to sour relations with a frequent coworker, he forced a smile.
“Next time.”
Fortunately, the taxi arrived, and Si-yul escaped into it. He was aware of Tae-joo looking at him bitterly through the window, like an abandoned puppy, but he didn’t look back.
The taxi quickly reached Hyun-se’s house through the quiet pre-dawn streets. Si-yul took the elevator up and entered the familiar passcode. As soon as the door opened and he stepped in, he took a deep breath, his chest swelling.
It was Hyun-se’s scent.
Though he called it a scent, it was more like moisture seeping into his skin. It slid over his skin like lotion and entered his nose, filling his lungs. Si-yul closed his eyes gently. Then he breathed deeply, like someone entering a lush green forest on a clear day without a speck of dust.
This was Hyun-se’s scent. He finally understood Yuwon’s description of it being like a snow-covered birch forest. It was the scent of fresh dawn air filling the spaces between white-barked trees reaching for the sky, of untrodden white snow layered so thickly the earth’s color couldn’t be seen – the inherent scent of a winter forest. Though he’d never been to such a place, he knew it. The scent touched not his nose, but his skin, his senses.
Si-yul removed his shoes and moved slowly, savoring the scent. Every corner of the house was filled with Hyun-se’s scent. It was frustrating that he hadn’t noticed until now.
Si-yul lay on the sofa for a moment, hugging a cushion. As he had done before, he buried his nose in it. A scent different from fabric softener permeated first. It welled up from his toes to the top of his head like rising water. Like dust dancing in the air when a blanket is shaken, Si-yul’s unique scent flowed out from his entire body without him realizing it.
