Extra Chapter 2-7
I felt sorry and ashamed. Looking at Mitchell, I could understand why I had acted that way, which only made me feel more bitter. Also, the shocking news that I had liked men was becoming diluted as time passed. It became something that seemed natural, as if it could have happened to me.
“You’re not answering?”
“I’m still here, aren’t I? Didn’t you say you’d let me keep doing this? Are you going back on your word?”
I seemed somewhat servile. That’s why I acted even more shamelessly. From the moment I was caught being here, I was already ruined. No, everything was ruined from the moment my past self confessed to Mitchell.
“There are many eyes watching. If you keep coming to the filming location, people will think our relationship is strange.”
“You don’t want to be misunderstood as gay, do you? If so, you shouldn’t have let me into your house. Because of your ambiguous actions in the past, I, who lost my memory, habitually went to your house, and even came here now. So you should have strongly rejected me from the beginning. That’s what I think.”
I acted a bit ugly. I blamed everything on Mitchell.
“Maybe you’re right.”
While I was acting like a petty person, Mitchell was being incredibly magnanimous. He looked relaxed sitting on the single brown leather sofa. Today, his black suit suited him annoyingly well.
“For now, don’t come. I’ll contact you every hour on the hour. If there’s no contact, then at the next hour.”
I lowered my head at his words not to come, but then shuddered at the method he suggested afterwards. He said he would do what I used to do only to people I was interested in before.
Ah, now I see. It was really like that. Because Mitchell gave me such allowances like this, I couldn’t leave him either.
“Okay. Let’s do that.”
Although I was delighted, I put on an expression that said, “I’ll let it slide this time.”
My resolve, which had been firm for over a month, was completely wrapped up in the single word ‘love’ that Mitchell threw today. It felt like I had become Mitchell’s slave.
By the way, do I have to keep looking at that pleased face?
That expression of trying to hold back a smile is slightly irritating? He’s not hiding something else from me, is he…?
“Today’s filming is over. I’m going home now.”
“What about me coming to your house, Mitchell?”
“I’ll allow you to come to my house. I’m not that cold-hearted a person. My heart is this weak.”
“You’ve got to be kid-”
“What did you say?”
“Nothing. I didn’t say anything.”
I shook my head quickly. Why did I say such a thing? The shock must be quite significant.
“See you at home. I’ll go to your house.”
“Now? I’m tired though.”
“Didn’t you say it’s okay to come to your house? I won’t do anything. I’ll just be at your house.”
Ah, this is why unrequited love is hard. It felt like being buried in mud, beyond just being clingy. Even though I was rejected, the thought of wanting to go to Mitchell’s house rushed in.
“Can’t be helped then. Let’s do that.”
Mitchell stood up and pulled at his collar to adjust his clothes. He looked down at me like a powerful authority figure. Thanks to that damn ‘love’ that suddenly popped up, I had the thought of wanting to kiss his lips. Surprised at my own thoughts, I turned my head away.
Thanks to this moment, I became certain. Mitchell’s words were true, and my past self really did love Mitchell. After realizing this, my emotions are exploding. My Adam’s apple bobbed.
***
As soon as I got home, I showered and quietly waited for Mitchell. There was a time he said it was okay for me to come to his house. Although I’m not used to the situation that changed in an instant, I definitely felt at ease.
Since the promised time is 6 o’clock, I thought we might have dinner together. Thinking it would be good to buy something, I took out my phone.
There were no messages left from before the accident that I had exchanged with him. It’s because of my habit of immediately deleting messages and call logs in case I lose my phone and someone sees it. If those were still there, I could have seen what conversations we had in the past.
I looked around the house.
Although this is my house, it doesn’t feel lived in, as if it’s not my house. Everything is furnished, but it feels like there are no items that I actually use. I just wanted to leave this place quickly.
After staring at the message window for a long time, I first went out and bought wine at a nearby store. Since it seems I can handle alcohol to some extent, I intended to drink it with dinner. After buying the wine, I didn’t go home but waited in front of Mitchell’s front door.
There was quite a bit of time left, but I wasn’t bored at all. Humming a tune in front of Mitchell’s house, I felt like I was getting one step closer to my original self.
“Okay, 6 o’clock.”
Finally, it was the appointed time.
Thinking it might be too eager to enter right at the hour, I rang the bell when it became 6:01. Although I knew the password, I held back. I thought I shouldn’t put too much pressure on the object of my unrequited love. I kept thinking about how I could become a comfortable person for Mitchell.
“Huh?”
But when the door didn’t open even after waiting, I quickly changed my mind about not putting pressure. Since he told me to come and doesn’t open the door, I have no choice but to enter myself. To hell with pressure.
He might also be thinking that I’ll come in on my own. Having succeeded in rationalizing, I entered the password and stepped inside the house.
After putting the wine down on the dining table, I headed straight to the bedroom. Of course, I knew the location of the bedroom. My body reacted first, even though I had no memory.
“Target human found.”
I muttered so only I could hear. After fondly watching Mitchell sleeping soundly in bed, I moved towards him as if drawn. Mitchell was wearing only shorts and was roughly covered with a thin blanket.
I carefully touched Mitchell’s bangs, which weren’t completely dry, while kneeling beside the bed. It seemed he had collapsed right after showering.
Just as I was about to touch his straight nose bridge, I came to my senses. I shouldn’t come on too strong to Mitchell, who isn’t even gay, as a man. I wondered when I had become gay, but it wasn’t particularly an important issue.
“Geon-woo.”
Just as I was putting strength in my legs to get up, Mitchell, who I thought was sleeping, opened his mouth. Whether he had slept deeply or not, his husky voice was languid and sweet.
“Shall I tell you what your past self used to do to me?”
It’s becoming troublesome as everything about Mitchell starts to look good. Even if he hadn’t told me first, I think I would have figured it out eventually. How passionately my past self loved Mitchell, that is.
Was hearing his husky voice such a good thing?
“What did I do?”
“When I was lying in bed like this, you would take off your clothes one by one from there.”
“What?”
I really was a crazy bastard. What kind of shameful act did I do in front of a man who isn’t even gay?
“Don’t you remember?”
“…No.”
“You would put your hand under the blanket and touch mine too. Even though I never gave you permission.”
“What an outrageous bastard I was… Sorry.”
“Sometimes you would touch my body while I was sleeping.”
“S-surely not.”
“That’s right. Almost every day if there wasn’t anything special? You were quite diligent. You.”
Unable to lift my face, I covered my forehead with my hand. What on earth did my crazy past self do to Mitchell?
“Moreover…”
“W-what else did I, that bastard, do?”
When I lifted my head, Mitchell was looking at me. Fortunately, he didn’t seem to be in a bad mood. He’s such a generous person that he can smile even after being treated like that by a man. Indeed, he had the magnanimity of a person who had reached the top of the American film industry.
“You asked me to put it in.”
“Huh?”
“You wanted to do it with me. You asked me to put it in your body.”
Finally, I couldn’t stand it anymore and got up. Haha, I laughed awkwardly while pacing back and forth in front of the bed. My hands were already sticky with sweat.
Love and sex are inevitably connected, but what I had done was beyond anything I could have imagined until now. I was the one who had completely cut out all memories with Mitchell. Sex between men didn’t even exist in the Bae Geon-woo category. But didn’t he say it was unrequited love? Why did Mitchell accept my crazy actions?
I pressed both my temples to calm my aching head.
“Don’t worry. We didn’t do it.”
“We didn’t? Ah, no. More than that, you shouldn’t be worrying about me, you should be worrying about yourself. You’re not even gay. I did all sorts of things. I’m really sorry.”
The current me apologized while cursing the garbage of the past. How mentally deranged must I have been to say such things to Mitchell Cronenwirth? I felt like even getting on my knees and thanking him for accepting all my misdeeds wouldn’t be enough.
“Don’t you want to do it now? I thought that even if the memories are gone, what the body wants might be the same.”
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
