“We said we’d go on a date after exams were over.”
The flames that had been blazing in Won-hyeok’s eyes slowly died down.
“Okay! I want to go on a d-date with you, sunbae.”
Without realizing it, Han-gyeom tightened his grip on Won-hyeok’s hand.
And that night, Won-hyeok sent him a text.
[Think about somewhere you want to go or something you want to do.]
After sending a reply, Han-gyeom opened his calendar for the first time in a while and saved an entry that said, “The day I held hands with sunbae for the first time.” Every time the moment he had held hands with Won-hyeok rose up in his mind in soft, swelling clouds, his body temperature shot up and he was overtaken by a flushed, stuffy feeling. His heart pounding wildly was something that happened often whenever he was with Won-hyeok, but that time had been different.
It had tingled as if electricity were bursting between their clasped hands. Even while speaking to Han-ul, the warmth of that hand gripping his so tightly had been incredibly warm.
Lying on his bed, Han-gyeom stretched one hand high toward the ceiling. Even in the dark room, he could clearly see the hand that had been clasped with Won-hyeok’s.
“This is bad. I think I’m liking sunbae more and more.”
Han-gyeom pulled the blanket all the way over his head. When all he had done was watch Won-hyeok from behind without any presence at all, he had simply admired him and liked him. Admiration and affection looked similar, but there was a definite difference between them.
Back when he had only secretly observed him, perhaps his admiration had been a little greater than any romantic attraction. Because he had genuinely thought Won-hyeok was cool—someone lacking in nothing and good at everything.
But now that they had become lovers and were together, the feeling of liking him had, before he knew it, overtaken that admiration. His heart trembled enough that simply being together felt good, and he liked him enough to feel emotions he had never once experienced in his life.
“I wish sunbae felt that way too.”
Han-gyeom shyly murmured from under the blanket. He knew not everyone’s heart could be exactly the same. And so those words—so overwhelming that it already felt far too much just to let them leave his lips—couldn’t make it out from under the blanket and simply faded away there.
***
“So this is the place you wanted to come to?”
Won-hyeok looked around. Maybe because they were inside a department store, the place was crowded with people. And right now, the two of them were standing in front of an entrance that read “Aquarium.”
An aquarium inside a department store. Near the entrance were signs and pamphlets showing ticket prices, and the passage leading inside was entirely washed in deep blue. Won-hyeok’s indifferent gaze swept over the place. Most of the people around them were families. The children, each holding a parent’s hand, were smiling with excited faces.
Watching them, Won-hyeok’s eyes were practically dead fish eyes—the kind belonging to someone who had long since thrown his childlike innocence into the trash.
“Yeah!”
And standing beside him, completely unlike Won-hyeok, Han-gyeom beamed with a rather excited face.
“I’ve really wanted to come here.”
Han-gyeom’s eyes sparkled with anticipation. At that, even Won-hyeok’s face, which had shown no reaction at all, gradually came to life a little.
“Well, if it’s somewhere you wanted to come.”
“A-and also.”
Han-gyeom edged a little closer to Won-hyeok’s side.
“I heard this place is, um, famous for that too. As a d-date course……”
Han-gyeom hadn’t chosen this place without thinking. Last night, remembering the moment he had held hands with Won-hyeok, he’d been so unable to calm his heart that he felt like he had to do something, anything, and turned on his phone without much thought. Then suddenly, wondering where people were supposed to go and what they were supposed to do on dates, he had opened the search bar.
Since Han-gyeom had absolutely no real-life experience, he needed to borrow at least other people’s experiences. He typed in things like good places for dates, date courses, and so on, and threw himself into researching diligently.
Right away, an enormous number of places poured out, even just within Seoul, and Han-gyeom, drowning and flailing in that sea of information, even felt the helplessness of drifting in the middle of a vast ocean. Then, the moment he found this aquarium, it felt like discovering a lighthouse shining a beam of light his way.
Since it was a place he had definitely wanted to visit at least once, and it was already famous as a date course too, there was no reason not to choose it.
“I did a lot of research yesterday.”
As Han-gyeom spoke with both fists clenched tight, Won-hyeok burst into laughter.
“Mm, yeah. That makes me happy. You’re enthusiastic about a date with me.”
“Really?”
When Han-gyeom smiled brightly with a soft, “Wow,” Won-hyeok casually took his hand.
“Ah……”
Han-gyeom’s earlobes turned red again.
“Let’s go. We should buy the tickets first, right?”
“Sunbae, your hand……”
“Why, you don’t like it? Should I not hold it?”
Won-hyeok bent at the waist to meet Han-gyeom’s eyes. Han-gyeom, briefly captivated by the crooked smile that lifted as he asked so shamelessly, shook his head hard.
“No! I-I want to hold it, keep holding it.”
Still clasping Han-gyeom’s hand, Won-hyeok walked to the ticket counter.
After buying their admission tickets, the two slowly entered the aquarium. Once their tickets were checked at the entrance and they moved inside, the atmosphere around them began to change in earnest. The lighting became suddenly dark, and shadows of rippling water touched everything around them.
“It’s huge.”
Han-gyeom cried out in surprise. It seemed he hadn’t expected it to be that large since it was inside a department store.
“Yeah, it is.”
Even as Won-hyeok answered vaguely, he never took his eyes off Han-gyeom. Because for him right now, it was far more interesting to watch Han-gyeom scanning everything around him with eyes bright enough to look like stars might fall out of them than to care about how big this place was or what it had.
There was one very good thing about Han-gyeom wearing contacts. Those pretty, clear eyes that he had previously only been able to see through glasses were now visible so well. The problem was that other bastards could see them too.
The inside of the aquarium was divided into several sections, and there were quite a lot of routes laid out so visitors could look at the fascinating sea creatures. Signs describing each creature’s characteristics could be seen beneath the tanks.
The two of them walked side by side, hand in hand, looking at the creatures in the tanks. As if proving he had really wanted to come, Han-gyeom stared at them with wonder and carefully read all the explanations too. And beside him, Won-hyeok watched Han-gyeom.
When they went farther in, they came upon a massive aquarium tank. Inside the tank, which covered an entire wall, sea turtles, rays, sharks, and all kinds of fish swam peacefully.
The moment he spotted that tank, Han-gyeom abruptly let go of Won-hyeok’s hand and dashed forward in one go. Won-hyeok looked back and forth between his suddenly empty hand and Han-gyeom’s back.
“Now I’m being put behind even a bunch of fish bastards. So that’s how it is.”
Though Won-hyeok let out a disbelieving laugh, he never stopped staring at that round back of Han-gyeom’s head. It was painfully obvious, even from behind, just how excited Han-gyeom was right now. Then, when other people started edging closer to Han-gyeom’s side, Won-hyeok rushed over like a ghost and claimed the spot beside him.
“Sunbae, look here.”
On the tank wall Han-gyeom pointed at, a ray was pressed up against the glass. To Won-hyeok’s eyes, it looked like nothing more than some dumb lower life-form.
In truth, he had felt that way ever since coming inside.
The creatures in the tanks couldn’t stir any particular emotion in Won-hyeok. He was the type who found fish more enjoyable to eat than to look at. But what was funny was that when he watched Han-gyeom smiling so brightly and happily like that, the blue scenery filling his view somehow felt a little different.
Shadows of blue waves fell across Han-gyeom’s pale face. His eyes shone like treasure sleeping beneath the sea.
“This one’s so cute.”
“You’re cuter.”
“Huh?”
Because of all the voices around them, Han-gyeom hadn’t heard properly and asked again, making Won-hyeok flustered. Even he hadn’t expected those words to slip out.
“It’s nothing.”
Won-hyeok gave an awkward dry cough and shook his head.
“But there are way more people here than in the other sections.”
Han-gyeom said it while looking around at the much bigger crowd gathered here than elsewhere.
“Yeah. Usually, this kind of giant tank is the most popular part of an aquarium.”
“I see. I didn’t know.”
Han-gyeom nodded while clapping his hands lightly. At first, Won-hyeok had brushed off everything casually, but after just now replaying his own answer in his head, he made a slightly puzzled face.
“The aquarium…… is this your first time here?”
Wasn’t it common knowledge that a giant tank was the highlight of an aquarium?
“Yeah!”
An answer without a shred of hesitation. In that case, when Han-gyeom had said he wanted to come here, had it not just been because this place was famous, but because he had been curious about what an aquarium itself was like?
But the more Won-hyeok thought that, the more puzzled he became.
“You’ve never come with your family?”
Usually, weren’t places like the zoo, amusement parks, and aquariums the kinds of places parents more or less inevitably took their children when they were young? Even Won-hyeok’s dry, suffocatingly rigid old-fashioned father had taken him here and there when he was little.
Of course, that was probably less because he truly wanted to make his child happy and more because of some pathetic sense of duty that an ideal family ought to do that sort of thing.
“Nope.”
Han-gyeom shook his head. He didn’t even attempt to think back on the past. As though there being no such memory was the most natural thing in the world, there was no sign in his tone or expression that he was trying to hide anything or felt embarrassed about it.
“So I wanted to come at least once.”
“Ah…… right.”
“Should we go over there this time?”
Pointing to the passage beside them, Han-gyeom started walking that way. Replaying the words he had just exchanged with Han-gyeom in his head, Won-hyeok slowly followed after him.
