“This is Su-ah’s entrance gift. I bought her a bag and some other things and put them inside.”
“Oh my, you really didn’t have to do all this. You should use that money for your own living expenses.”
“I have money to live on too. I earn pretty well.”
“Earn well, my foot. With how weak your body still is…….”
“I’m healthier than I used to be.”
The Director continued to clasp Yi-hyeon’s still-small hand tightly, her eyes brimming with tears. That once-fragile body—now that he was twenty—rarely got nosebleeds anymore, and episodes of hyperventilation had decreased as well. It was like a frail puppy growing into an adult dog, its immunity finally built up.
“Oh, right. This—Minseo said it was yours and stuffed it into my bag.”
The only things Yi-hyeon had left behind at the orphanage were his desk, his bed, and the cardigan that had once belonged to Han Jun’s mother. So he had no idea what it could be. Curious, he craned his neck.
“Wait a second. I’m sure it was a necklace. Don’t tell me I dropped it on the way?”
A necklace?
Yi-hyeon, who never wore accessories, could only tilt his head in confusion.
Thinking hard, he suddenly remembered the day Han Jun had barged in with apple mangoes, when Minseo had mentioned a necklace. He’d clearly said it wasn’t his back then. He’d meant to find the real owner but had completely forgotten. Ah, he muttered inwardly, smacking his knee.
“Here it is!”
But what the Director pulled out of her bag wasn’t a necklace for a person—it was a pet collar. Made of a beaded chain with adjustable length. Yi-hyeon already knew who it belonged to. It was Louis’s—the one he’d worn around his neck until Yi-hyeon returned to being human.
But why is this……?
Yi-hyeon couldn’t understand why the collar was with him. He’d woken up with his soul returned while lying in a hospital bed, after all. Staring at the collar with bewildered eyes, Yi-hyeon finally spoke.
“Where did this come from?”
“They said Soondori was carrying it around in his mouth. Why?”
What is this…?
At that moment, his heart began to race strangely fast. Yi-hyeon hadn’t suffered hyperventilation or physical strain even when doing demanding work for a while now—but the instant he saw Louis’s belonging, his heart thudded violently, as if his soul itself were reacting. When Yi-hyeon clutched his chest, the startled Director rose from her chair and hurried over.
“What’s wrong? Are you having another hyperventilation episode?”
“N-no. I think my heart just got startled because something cold suddenly touched me.”
“Are you sure? You’re not lying because you don’t want Teacher to worry?”
“I’m really fine. I barely even catch colds these days, and those nosebleeds that used to happen several times a week—now it’s once a month, if that.”
Yi-hyeon smiled awkwardly and sucked hard on the drink in front of him. Hesitating over the unsettling sensation, he said he’d keep the collar for now and took it. As if recognizing its rightful owner, his pounding heart gradually settled.
Back home, Yi-hyeon sat at his desk, placed the collar on top, and stared at it intently.
The only thing that distinguished it from other collars was that it was an expensive, high-end product from a premium pet supplies brand. Other than that, there was nothing particularly special about it. And yet—why?
“Since I can’t meet Han Jun, should I tell Chief Kim to take it to him?”
The moment the words left his mouth, thump—his heart resounded heavily. It seemed the collar’s owner wanted to see Han Jun’s face. Unable to grant that wish, Yi-hyeon shook his head, stood up, and shoved the collar deep into the far corner of his desk drawer. Then he rushed to his bed and collapsed onto it as if falling.
***
“Yoon Yi-hyeon?”
Because he hadn’t attended the freshman orientation, the awkwardness lingered from the very first day of classes. Then a student approached him, and Yi-hyeon’s expression stiffened harder than asphalt.
“Whoa. You suddenly transferred schools, so I was curious—what’s your deal?”
It was Seo Ju-yeon, who’d been in the same class as Yi-hyeon before he transferred. She was friends with Kim Yeon-seo, so they’d exchanged a few words before.
“Oh. Long time no see.”
Worried she might also know Han Jun, Yi-hyeon avoided her gaze for no real reason.
“Why did you transfer without saying anything? That was kind of cold.”
“Ah…… there were some things going on at home.”
“Really? Oh—what about Han Jun? Is he at Korea University too?”
“Huh?”
“You know, Han Jun. The one you were super close with.”
“Ah…… we weren’t that close. I don’t really know.”
“Really? Yeon-seo said you two were really close, so I thought you transferred to follow him.”
“Transferred? What do you mean?”
“After you transferred, Han Jun dropped out right away.”
He’d heard news of Han Jun from the most unexpected place. Yi-hyeon, who’d assumed Han Jun must have gotten into a good university and a good department, felt his heart sink.
“What? Han Jun dropped out?”
“Wow, you really didn’t know. It was like a week after you transferred, I think? He dropped out immediately. There were rumors about him going to the US or something, but no one knew for sure. I thought he followed you.”
Yi-hyeon thought Han Jun must have been deeply shocked by his message. No—truthfully, he’d hoped so. He’d hoped Han Jun would be disappointed in him, curse him as a terrible person, and move on quickly. But he’d never once imagined Han Jun would drop out.
Yi-hyeon sat through the entire lecture in a daze.
Even after it ended, he couldn’t think of anything until the students poured out and Ju-yeon nudged his shoulder, asking what he was doing.
***
Yi-hyeon knew it was foolish—disappearing overnight like he was running away, swearing he’d forget, only to act like this now—but he wanted to know at least a little more about Han Jun.
What had he been doing since dropping out? Had he entered another university? Had his relationship with his father improved again? But since Yi-hyeon had no intention of contacting him again or trying to reconnect even if he found out, he had no choice but to suppress his curiosity.
In the end, though, his steps carried him all the way to the front of Assemblyman Han Cheol-woo’s house.
Planning to just see Han Jun’s face from afar—only from afar—Yi-hyeon hid behind a utility pole and waited for a light to turn on in Han Jun’s bedroom window.
No matter how long he waited, the light never came on.
As Yi-hyeon turned to leave, thinking he should just go home, Han Jun’s birthday crossed his mind. Then he remembered the building and unit number Mi-jin had told him when she’d tossed him the apartment card key back then.
Did he move there?
He hoped Han Jun hadn’t gone to the US. Muttering to himself, Yi-hyeon stopped at the bus stop. He knew he shouldn’t be doing this, but from the moment he heard news about Han Jun, he couldn’t stop thinking about him. He wanted to see him, talk to him, hold him.
He wanted to be by his side.
Thinking about his own situation—unable to do any of that—Yi-hyeon told himself, Just once. Just once, he wanted to see if Han Jun was doing well, even if only his face. With that 마음, he went all the way to Building 501 of the apartment Han Jun had received as a gift.
He sat on the bench in front of it and stared up at the 24th floor so intently he worried his neck might snap.
Not remembering Han Jun’s exact unit number, he just stood there looking up—when the lights in both the 4-line and 5-line units turned on. The bright glow peeking through the curtains reminded him of Han Jun’s complexion, and his heart fluttered for no reason.
“Han Jun, you…… are you there?”
If you are, then just once—just once—please appear by the window.
Muttering that to himself, he stared blindly upward. Just as he was about to stand from the bench, since bus service was almost over, the living room of Unit 2401 lit up brightly. At that instant, a bright light also switched on in Yi-hyeon’s shadowed memories.
Building 501, Unit 2401.
As if it were a lie, the number written on Han Jun’s card key resurfaced vividly in his mind. The moment he saw the silhouette pulling open the living room curtains, Yi-hyeon jolted like someone burned by fire and spun around. He hid behind the tree beside the bench. Only after the large, flickering shadow disappeared did Yi-hyeon bolt toward the bus stop as if fleeing.
***
Suppressing his longing, Yi-hyeon carried on with his school life as diligently as he could. Or rather, just knowing that they existed under the same sky was enough to give him the drive to keep moving forward. No matter how much he missed Han Jun, he told himself he couldn’t go looking for him anymore.
He was enduring it well—until May 5th approached. Then, like soil crumbling away under falling rain, Yi-hyeon’s heart collapsed helplessly.
Other than his aunt, there’s probably no one celebrating his birthday.
No—that wasn’t true. Maybe he’d made friends, maybe even found a lover by now. But if not—
After finishing his lecture, lost deep in thought as he wandered across campus, someone lightly tapped Yi-hyeon on the shoulder.
“Yoon Yi-hyeon!”
Startled, he nearly tripped over the gap between the paving stones. Regaining his balance and turning around, Yi-hyeon found Yeon-seo standing there with a bright smile.
