“Alright. Give me a question.”
Frogs in a well who think they’re smart due to textbook-focused studying, private education, and grades optimized purely for college entrance exams.
Saebyeok thought of a question that was difficult but not too difficult, then calmly said it.
“If a Spinosaurus and a Tyrannosaurus fought, which dinosaur would win?”
This is totally common knowledge, right?
“…”
“…”
“…”
Looking at the employees who couldn’t clearly answer a basic knowledge question that even a 5-year-old would know, Saebyeok said:
“Since I won, from now on, shut up and let’s go. I tend to get carsick.”
***
“Sit down, sit down.”
Saebyeok took a seat in the corner instead of the head of the table or middle seats that would attract attention. It wasn’t particularly intentional, but as he aimed for the corner, he ended up sitting next to Saetbyeol.
He had chosen his seat deliberately to sit apart from others, but those people followed without any sense of awareness.
As a result, it ended up with Saetbyeol grilling the meat alone while the rest just ate. Unable to watch any longer, Saebyeok tried to help Saetbyeol by grilling the meat himself, which finally prompted the others to make a fuss about grilling it themselves.
They should have done that from the beginning.
While the atmosphere wasn’t one that forced people to drink, those who drank on their own were noticeably louder than before.
Everyone seemed to be getting tipsy, so I should take this opportunity to contact Pyeonghwa.
Saebyeok stepped outside with excited steps. He went into a quiet alley and called Gong Pyeonghwa.
The call connected before it even rang three times.
-Saebyeok!
“Yes!”
-Where are you? What are you doing? Is it okay for you to talk? I’m coming soon!
Coming? Where to? Here? Is it okay if he comes? Won’t it be dangerous? Might it be a bit risky?
As if reading Saebyeok’s thoughts, Gong Pyeonghwa answered as if he had been waiting.
-I’m going out to eat with your mother and Noeul! We’re leaving soon! It’ll take a little time, so wait. Smooch, smooch, smooch.
“What? When…”
The call ended. No, no, no… Alright. I’ll try to survive this battlefield of a company dinner.
Of all places, he was at a table with three people who had the drinking habit of forcing others to drink. Saebyeok decided to hold out until Gong Pyeonghwa arrived.
During his absence, a few more guests had arrived. There were assistant managers from other teams and…
“Team Manager.”
“Yes. Eat a lot since it’s the company’s money. Intern Shin and Employee Kim as well.”
Even Team Manager Dok.
As the sales team, especially the working-level staff, started joining, the atmosphere became even more boisterous.
It started with empty praise about working hard today, then proceeded to workplace difficulties and mentoring requests. They set goals and assigned daily tasks that could be accomplished during work hours.
“And starting next week, sales team employees will follow their respective mentors on business trips. Only Team Haeying 1 will exceptionally come with me. Don’t forget to bring your laptops since you’ll still need to check daily tasks.”
“Alright, that’s enough of the textbook talk, everyone drink! Drink! Team Manager Dok, how about a toast…”
“I’ll pass.”
The assistant manager from another team, either because he enjoyed taking the initiative or liked getting attention, called for a toast that nobody had asked for.
The new employees, who were already somewhat drunk, happily refilled their glasses.
It’s amazing how they keep shaking the rattles enthusiastically even while drunk. Perhaps their ambition ranks higher than their character.
Is the idea of a beneficial company dinner where senior staff mentor new employees really as mythical as a unicorn?
“You haven’t had a single drink? Drink, drink. Open up your esophagus and wet it.”
Hmm. Is it impossible to have such a thing once you clock out?
When they poured soju generously into a beer glass, Saebyeok took the glass and set it aside.
And then Saetbyeol drank it of her own accord. Since she was already drunk, half a glass of soju seemed to hit her hard. Her eyes, her gaze was not normal.
But people didn’t pay attention to Saetbyeol. How difficult would it be for her tomorrow if she passed out like this? Feeling sympathetic, Saebyeok pushed some food and water toward Saetbyeol.
Whether her habit when drunk was to eat, Saetbyeol put everything in her mouth without checking. Our Iseul and Pyeonghwa also put everything in their mouths if I take my eyes off them for a moment…
Thinking this way, Saebyeok couldn’t take his eyes off Saetbyeol. What if she ends up eating a fork too? As Saebyeok was looking after Saetbyeol out of concern, a voice cut in from the side.
“Is that how you seduced your lover too? When someone with a partner does that, it’s adultery. Adultery.”
“It’s not ‘yuje’ but ‘yujoe’ (guilty).”
“Are you saying I’m wrong? Huh?”
This little punk… He seemed to be trying to mutter quietly, but his voice was already loud due to intoxication, so everything was audible.
Me, a gigolo?
Saebyeok was bewildered by something he had never heard in his life. Jebi (swallow). A common summer bird in Korea, a species in the swallow family of the Passeriformes order, with an upper body that’s bluish-black, a dark reddish-brown forehead and throat, the rest of the underside being creamy white with white patches on the tail feathers, measuring about 18cm in size?
“Are you calling me a gigolo?”
“Yeah, you’re a male prostitute. F…ck, you act all high and mighty just because you lucked out and changed your fate…”
Me, me a male prostitute? I’m actually accomplished, so it’s not pretending to be great but actually being great…
“What, you think I don’t know? Everyone here knows but they’re just not saying anything.”
“Know what?”
“You, you lucked out by meeting a good woman…”
I lucked out by meeting a woman? The only women in my life are my mom, Noeul, and Iseul…
Just as he was about to ask what nonsense this was, the employee next to him covered the other’s mouth. Then he reprimanded him with a twisted tongue, telling him to behave if he was going to be drunk.
I wanted to say something, but there were too many people watching. Not knowing how rumors might spread, Saebyeok decided to just endure it. Besides, many people weren’t in their right minds due to alcohol.
Feeling like he would be forced to drink if he stayed any longer, Saebyeok stood up to leave, but someone grabbed his wrist from the seat right next to him.
“Where are you going?”
“To the bathroom.”
Saebyeok said, shaking off the rough hand. At the mention of the bathroom, Saetbyeol stood up abruptly.
“Me too… me too bathroom…”
While his wrist was grabbed as soon as he stood up, nobody paid attention to Saetbyeol who was stumbling toward the bathroom.
Thinking someone should follow her, Saebyeok noticed Team Manager Dok getting up from his seat, seemingly with the same thought.
Just to be safe, Saebyeok followed too. Fortunately, Saetbyeol made it into the bathroom on her own, and Saebyeok ended up standing outside the bathroom with Team Manager Dok.
“Intern Shin, you have better manners than you look.”
“As you can see, I can’t afford to have bad manners with this appearance.”
“Are you saying you’re living up to your looks? You’re very confident.”
“There’s no reason not to be.”
What can I do about being born handsome? Who would appreciate false modesty about this? Be humble about things that deserve humility. Actually, pretending I’m not like this would seem more reproachable.
“I can’t win a single argument with you.”
“Should I let you win?”
“You joke around outside of work too.”
I’m not joking. I’m serious…
“Eat a moderate amount and go home. Want to share a taxi with Employee Kim?”
“No, I’ll eat a bit more.”
“More ambitious than you look?”
Saebyeok, a man with ambitions to grow Baeksan larger than Taekang, gave a noncommittal answer.
“Where do people learn such unbecoming behaviors?”
“Unbecoming?”
“Creating factions to establish connections, discriminating against others. Wouldn’t it be better to study one more case in that time?”
Yet you’re here too.
When Saebyeok silently stared at him, Team Manager Dok seemed to feel guilty and started talking freely.
“I’m here because I’m worried about Employee Saetbyeol. Don’t put me in the same category. If you’re going to judge, at least give me a figurine.”
“That figurine is mine. Don’t covet it.”
“You’re quite cold outside of work. Not leaving any room for negotiation?”
“If it were me, I’d be looking at auctions right now. No, I’d be posting on second-hand trading sites.”
Where did you learn such unbecoming behavior as pressuring subordinates for figurines?
“I got scammed.”
“…”
“So I only do in-person transactions now.”
Ah, I see…
“Still, no. I received it as a gift, so I can’t give it away.”
“Tsk.”
What’s with the ‘tsk’?
By the way, has Ms. Saetbyeol gotten locked in the bathroom? Why isn’t she coming out? Since Team Manager Dok doesn’t seem like he’ll do anything, I should ask another female employee to check.
On the way back to the dinner venue, his wrist was grabbed again. This time it wasn’t unpleasant. He could sense familiar pheromones.
“Saebyeok!”
It felt like it had been a million years since they last met, and since the last time they saw each other was when they parted on bad terms, Saebyeok felt like he might cry at the sight of Gong Pyeonghwa’s face.
After a brief moment of joy at their reunion, the two looked around and went into a secluded alley.
“What’s happened? What’s happened? Our Saebyeok’s face is half its size! Don’t they feed you at our house? Are they giving you cold treatment? Should I go flip some tables?”
“No, I just haven’t had an appetite. You know I don’t eat well when I focus on something.”
“Still, someone should have made sure you ate! If it was me, I would have! I would have at least made you some grain powder drink!”
That’s true…
“But that’s what I should be saying. Why have your cheeks gotten so hollow? It’s upsetting.”
“Something happened.”
Unable to explain that it was the build-up phase for a hunger strike, he brushed it off vaguely.
“Don’t worry about me, d-mn, what kind of company dinner is this? Ordering strange things. Has the company fallen on hard times? D-mn…”
“It’s actually in a historic boom period.”
“Have you been brainwashed? Did they take you away for new employee training? Snap out of it! Don’t kneel to the capitalist!”
“That’s your father and my father-in-law.”
Ah, poor thing… You’ve been brainwashed. Gong Pyeonghwa cupped Saebyeok’s cheeks and gazed at his dry lips with sympathetic eyes.
This… shouldn’t I try to break the brainwashing with a kiss of love?
Perhaps because he finally saw the face he had missed so much, his pheromones jumped around like a newly manifested unique trait.
Even to the naked eye, his excitement was evident, and as he released pheromones as if in heat, it was hard for Saebyeok to pretend not to notice.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
