The butler and the attendants searched the entire room, but they couldn’t find the portrait anywhere. I had checked just last night and confirmed it was still on the table, yet now I couldn’t think of any other place it could be.
I couldn’t keep holding up busy people because of me, so I had no choice but to send them all away. Even after that, I continued searching the room alone, but it was nowhere to be found.
Leaning against the window frame, I smoked one cigarette after another. Eventually, unable to bear the frustration, I stepped out into the garden. If I stayed in the room, I knew I wouldn’t be able to let it go and would just keep obsessively searching for the portrait. I needed to get out of there.
As I walked through the garden, I kept telling myself that this was for the best. I was planning to tear it up anyway. Maybe someone had thrown it away in my stead because I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Maybe they had taken it far, far away where I’d never see it again.
‘So just forget about it already.’
I came to an abrupt stop and clenched my fists. I wanted to scream. No matter how much I questioned the missing portrait about where it had gone, it wasn’t going to magically crawl back to me.
Taking a deep breath, I resumed walking through the garden. This time, I made sure to keep my wits about me so I wouldn’t end up wandering into the western forest again. I was heading toward the hill on the opposite side when, in the distance, I saw someone waving at me.
“Young Master!”
I recognized the familiar voice and looked up. It was, as expected, a familiar face. The burly attendant who had carried me and ran through the mansion yesterday—his name was Seon-woo, I think. It had only been a day, but his name already felt hazy in my memory.
Seon-woo, who had just set down an axe, came running toward me. With his beaming face and the way he dashed over, he really did remind me of a giant retriever.
“Hello, Young Master.”
“Yeah, hi.”
As soon as I returned the greeting, a rosy flush spread across his freckled cheeks. He raised an arm, half-covering his face, and took a deep breath. Now that I looked closer, it seemed he had been running so fast he was out of breath.
“Where are you headed?”
Seon-woo, who had regained his normal complexion after steadying his breathing, asked me. “Just taking a walk,” I answered briefly before starting off again. But Seon-woo trailed right behind me, like a puppy following its owner on a stroll.
“Why are you following me?”
“I’m on break right now.”
Hadn’t he just been working a moment ago? But since he claimed otherwise, I didn’t want to bother questioning it. I just told him to do as he pleased and continued on my way. Seon-woo nodded and, despite his large frame, followed me quietly.
As I climbed the hill, my breath caught in my throat. I considered turning back, but then I felt Seon-woo’s gaze on me from behind. The thought of it made me push forward again.
Clenching my teeth, I pushed myself up the hill and settled down in the shade of a large tree. Seon-woo, who had been watching me carefully, hesitated before sitting a little distance away.
“Isn’t it uncomfortable sitting like that?”
“The grass is soft, so it’s fine.”
“Still, just in case—”
Seon-woo rummaged through his pockets and pulled something out. It was a crisp white handkerchief, oddly delicate for someone of his size. He spread it out gently on the grass and gestured for me to sit on it.
“Here?”
“Your clothes might get dirty.”
I didn’t actually need it, but since he had gone through the trouble, I moved onto the handkerchief. That alone seemed to make Seon-woo happy for some reason. He scooted just a little closer than before.
The breeze felt cool in the shade. It dried the sweat on my forehead as I slowly blinked. The weather was so pleasant that I felt like I could fall asleep if I lay down. Maybe that’s why my tangled thoughts were beginning to untangle, even if only slightly.
Coming outside had been a good idea. If I had stayed in my room, I’d still be tormenting myself, frantically searching for the portrait. Of course, I wasn’t completely over it yet, but I was definitely doing better than before.
“Is the work tough for you?”
“For me?”
“Yeah, you. Who else is here besides you?”
Seon-woo grinned like an idiot, pressing down on his short hair with his hand. Was it really that nice just to be asked a question? Well, I suppose for a servant, even being acknowledged by a young master who never used to make eye contact might be something to be happy about—but I wouldn’t really know.
“Not at all! Actually, my friends are jealous of me. Everyone wants to work at the mansion. And I’m pretty good with physical labor, so it’s totally fine.”
Rolling up his sleeve, Seon-woo flexed his arm, showing off his well-defined muscles. Was this… supposed to be a boast? Was he trying to impress me with how great his biceps were?
His sudden display made me involuntarily pout. I must have been obvious about it because Seon-woo, who had been talking excitedly, quickly picked up on my mood and shut his mouth.
“Did I do something wrong?”
“No, you didn’t.”
“But your expression—”
Our eyes met—closer than I had expected. Startled, Seon-woo flinched and immediately backed away, mumbling an awkward apology. Even when I told him it was fine, he continued to fidget anxiously, so I told him to just leave if he was going to be like that. Only then did he finally calm down.
It was strange. At some point, all my tangled thoughts had drifted far away. Maybe I really did need to be around people. Then again, ever since becoming Han Seo-yul, I had consciously kept my distance from others.
I was never particularly interested in other people to begin with, but maybe it was more accurate to say that all my attention had been consumed by just one person—so I had none left to spare.
‘What a fool.’
A small chuckle escaped me. Leaning my head back, I gazed up at the thick canopy of leaves overhead. The green foliage fluttered with the wind, shifting back and forth. Watching them sway, I figured it was about time to head back.
“Are you heading back?”
“Yeah. I need to check one more time.”
“Check for what?”
“Something I lost.”
Of course, searching my room again wouldn’t suddenly bring back what had disappeared. But I told myself this would be the last time—if I still couldn’t find it, I would let it go. I’d just believe that someone had taken care of it for me, so I wouldn’t have to keep clinging to the past like a fool.
Seon-woo stood up with me, carefully folding the crumpled handkerchief before tucking it back into his pocket. As we walked back down the hill, I asked about the handkerchief—it didn’t suit someone his size. He said his sister had given it to him.
We talked about all sorts of trivial things on the way back. It wasn’t boring, and more importantly, it wasn’t depressing. When we reached the mansion, Seon-woo went back to work while I entered through the main gate.
“Young Master, welcome back.”
“Yeah, I’m back.”
After exchanging greetings with an attendant tidying up the foyer, I climbed the stairs leading to the second floor. That was when I ran into him—stepping out of the library just in time.
His gaze wavered with unspoken emotions as he looked at me.
I was the first to regain composure, giving him a small nod in greeting. But just as I was about to pass by, he suddenly closed the distance and grabbed my wrist. His grip was so tight that I let out an involuntary groan from the pain.
“Let go…!”
Without a word, he dragged me down the corridor. No matter how much I told him to release me, he didn’t respond.
He led me past the main building and into the annex, shoving me into his room before immediately shutting the door behind us.
“What the hell are you—”
Click.
The sound of the lock clicking into place made me swallow my words.
I realized then—we were alone in a space where no one could come. A warning siren blared in my head.
“Does your wrist hurt?”
He turned around, eyes narrowing at the sight of my skin—red and already bruising with hints of blue. His brows furrowed in frustration.
Like he had any right to be concerned after doing this himself.
I yanked my arm away from him and turned toward the door. Staying in the same space as him wouldn’t lead to anything good. If I wavered, I’d have to hurt him again with more lies, and the guilt would only keep piling up inside me.
But just as I reached for the doorknob, he grabbed my wrist again and spun me around, closing the distance between us. My back hit the hard surface of the door.
He pried my hand completely off the doorknob, blocking any chance of escape. With his teeth clenched, he spoke in a low voice.
“Don’t go. Talk to me.”
“I have nothing to say.”
“For god’s sake, drop that damn formal speech!”
His sudden outburst was punctuated by a loud thud—his fist slamming into the wall. I instinctively turned my head and saw the dent left behind in the solid surface.
I should have been scared, but oddly enough, I found it more fascinating than frightening.
“Just give me a moment. I need to say something.”
“You call this a conversation? Dragging someone in here like this?”
“That’s—”
“…….”
“If I didn’t, you would’ve run away again, Seo-yul hyung.”
I couldn’t argue with that.
He let out a frustrated sigh, then took a step back. For a moment, he just stared at me—before slowly raising his pinky finger in front of me.
“Promise me. No running. Just talk to me.”
His pinky moved ever so slightly, a subtle beckoning.
Through my blurred vision, it flickered like a candle flame.
I was the one who had told him before—if you make a promise with a pinky swear, you must keep it.
Before I could hesitate any further, he took my hand and hooked my finger around his. He gave our locked pinkies a gentle shake, a soft smile gracing his lips.
“You promised, Seo-yul hyung.”
