Chapter 59
Ji-won, who had taken 30 minutes to clean up something that should have taken 5 minutes, slumped down on the floor. Moonlight poured through the window since he hadn’t drawn the curtains. Through the open door gap, he could see a round crown of hair. Even though it was his own room, he couldn’t bring himself to enter.
He’d seen more than his fair share of friends who turned into animals when drunk. Those who sang excitedly or shouted at the top of their lungs were cute by comparison—he’d experienced all sorts of cases: people who vomited, stripped, or walked out of convenience stores without paying. But he could say with certainty that he’d never seen someone who kissed.
For some reason, a thought he’d had a few days ago crossed Ji-won’s mind. Does he do this to other guys too…? But that seemed inappropriate for the situation, so he quickly dismissed it. Obviously, Kwon-ju wasn’t aware it was him when he did it, and it shouldn’t have been.
“His eyes… were open.”
The two eyes that had clearly met his were burned into his memory. They weren’t strangely unfocused or barely open and sleepy. He couldn’t forget the distinct gaze that seemed to know exactly what it was seeing.
While Ji-won sat in the living room spending the night wide awake with sighs, Kwon-ju, who had been laid on a soft bed through someone’s efforts, woke up refreshed. Though he had a slight hangover, his condition was much better than expected. It might be because he’d succeeded in kissing his first love, as he’d long dreamed of doing, but fortunately or unfortunately, Kwon-ju couldn’t remember anything from last night.
“…”
He was slightly surprised to see an unfamiliar ceiling, but there wasn’t much to think about. Considering his narrow social circle and extremely limited range of movement, the only place he could have woken up in was Ji-won’s house, where they had drunk together yesterday.
Blinking drowsily, about to close his eyes again, Kwon-ju belatedly remembered whose bed he was lying on and sat up with a start. This is hyung’s bed. Even with the blanket covering him, trying not to be conscious of it, the scent naturally enveloped him. A familiar smell.
Not wanting to loathe himself any further, Kwon-ju got up. But as soon as his feet touched the floor, he faced another crisis: he realized that the owner of this room, of this bed he had been sleeping in, was nowhere to be found.
“Hyung.”
“You’re awake.”
As soon as Kwon-ju walked into the living room, Ji-won, who had been sitting on the sofa, hurriedly stood up. The way he jumped up was oddly strange, but neither of them had the mental capacity to care about such things—one because of his complicated thoughts, the other due to worry.
“Did I… make any mistakes yesterday?”
Trying to calm his anxiously trembling voice, Kwon-ju asked cautiously. The reason was obviously because there were many things he felt guilty about. It was extremely unsettling that he couldn’t remember anything after getting drunk. He was afraid that with the help of alcohol, he might have done things he wouldn’t dare even dream of while sober. Just the fact that he’d taken someone else’s bed made it impossible for him to feel at ease.
If he had to pick the absolute worst scenario, it would be a drunken confession, but he kept thinking of other things that would make the listener’s skin crawl, like “I came to this university just to follow you, hyung” or “I pretended not to know the game but started it because I remembered the server name I overheard in passing, just to play with you…”
“Hyung?”
“Huh? Oh, no. You just fell asleep right after getting drunk.”
Ji-won, who had been lost in thought and answered a beat late, was obviously flustered. Having been quietly sitting until now, suddenly fixing his gaze on the floor as he answered—it was only natural for Kwon-ju to be shocked.
“I’m sorry for falling asleep without helping clean up.”
“No. It’s fine.”
His tone of reply seemed strangely cold. He hasn’t made eye contact since earlier. While Kwon-ju’s anxious gaze darted around, Ji-won, with no mental space to understand Kwon-ju’s feelings, said apologetically:
“It’s 7 AM now. I need to shower and clean up, so you should head home now that you’ve come to your senses.”
“Ah, okay.”
“Take care.”
Kwon-ju stood emptily in front of the coldly closed front door. Though Ji-won had said it was nothing, judging by his current reaction, something definitely had happened. What did I say? He wanted to open the door again and ask right away, but he didn’t know the password that he had persuaded Ji-won to change.
Only after confirming the sound of trudging footsteps fading away did Ji-won finally get up and enter the bathroom. He showered with cold water for a long time, washing away the alcohol accumulated on his body and the vivid heat of last night. After standing like that for a while, he belatedly turned off the water and bowed his head as drops fell from his hair.
Why did Jang Kwon-ju kiss me? Excluding unreasonable speculations, there were about two options: either he mistook Ji-won for his partner or someone he was seeing, or his pent-up sexual desire erupted with the help of alcohol. But the chances of him dating during his gap year were slim, and given his shy personality, Ji-won had rarely seen him talking with female classmates at university.
Of course, Ji-won didn’t know everything about Kwon-ju’s private life, but… crucially, someone with a girlfriend or romantic interest wouldn’t spend all day with a male senior.
So there was only one conclusion: He was frustrated from not being able to date.
“Haah…”
Why did it have to burst out while drinking with me? Ji-won covered his face with both hands and sighed deeply into his palms. He had suggested the drinking session to become more comfortable and open with each other, but it seemed like they might become awkward instead.
Lost in thought, Ji-won unconsciously touched his lips. How could Kwon-ju end up being his first kiss in years? More than the act itself, it was the completely unexpected identity of the other person that wouldn’t leave his mind. It was that much of a shock.
If it had been anyone else, he would have just cursed about how disgusting it was and brushed his teeth a few times. He couldn’t figure out the source of this strange feeling and emotion. It was weird from the start that he’d hidden the truth from Kwon-ju, who seemed to have no memory of it. Normally, he would have joked, “Do you know what you did when you were drunk yesterday?” and teased him to buy coffee if he had any conscience.
…Actually, getting excited while kissing a guy is weird to begin with, fuck. Thoughts that made his head throb with complexity brought up curse words he rarely used. It must be a natural phenomenon. He was drunk, and the mood was like that. But no matter how many times he rationalized it, he couldn’t help feeling tight in his chest and confused in his head.
Trudging out of the bathroom and roughly drying his hair with a blow dryer, Ji-won slumped down on the bed. But then, as last night’s memories surfaced again, he quickly got up and moved to a chair.
“I wonder if anyone is setting up a blind date now.”
Desperately trying to shake off memories of last night, Ji-won turned on his phone. How did it come to this? Why was he trying to help someone else’s love life? He didn’t know the reason, but anyway, he wanted to do it and felt like he had to.
[Seungmin is setting up a 3:3 group date with girls from Political Science]
[But I don’t think it’s right for a returning student to join]
[I’m not going to join]
As it happened, he had heard from Mingyu that the freshman class president he had been introduced to was arranging a 3:3 group date with the Department of Political Science, so he contacted him right away. He asked if they had filled all the spots, or if he could recommend someone.
[Jang Kwon-ju?]
[Forget eloquence, he’ll make the other guys look like nobodies LOL]
Though nothing had been decided yet, the class president laughed and said the two people going together probably wouldn’t like it. Ji-won quietly agreed with that statement. If it were him, he probably wouldn’t want to go with Kwon-ju either.
[But that’s fine with me~~~ I’m just inviting people separately and not joining myself haha]
[I’ll ask and let you know]
[Yes, please ask and let me know lolol]
And just like that, he inadvertently made a promise. How should I bring this up? Thinking that he couldn’t even ask after already giving away Kwon-ju’s name, Ji-won sighed deeply and turned off his phone.
* * *
“Hello.”
A calm voice and slightly trembling hand. Kwon-ju smiled brightly at Ji-won who was greeting him and stood before him.
Ji-won, whom he met after the weekend, looked no different from usual except for seeming a bit tired because it was morning. When they had met in the game, he had seemed the same too, so Kwon-ju had wondered if he wasn’t angry, but seeing him face to face was even more reassuring. It seemed the anger had subsided over the weekend. If it was that level of anger, then he probably hadn’t stupidly confessed while drunk.
Kwon-ju, who had spent the entire two days suffering as he recalled 101 potential scenarios of drunken mistakes, finally felt liberation, making his steps feel lighter. And Ji-won immediately caught that very slight change in mood. He seems to be in a good mood now. Thinking it was good timing, Ji-won glanced around slightly and naturally brought up the topic.
“I heard the first-year students are having a group date with Political Science.”
“…What?”
“I heard there’s an empty spot. What do you think? Interested in going?”
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
