#16
“Whenever he comes to the dorm, he locks himself in his room, and I wondered what he was doing. I roughly guessed he was gaming, but I didn’t know he’d made a friend.”
“Right, I didn’t know either.”
Friend, friend. Hearing Sura’s words made his relationship with Hajun feel more real. No matter how he thought about it, there was no more fitting word than “friend.” He settled in the corner of the sofa, rolling the unfamiliar word on his tongue.
He didn’t want to spread the news about Hajun like idle gossip. He consistently played dumb to Sura’s eyes asking for more explanation and quietly kicked Saha’s shin.
“Ouch, that hurts.” “Stop teasing.” After gently smiling at Saha who was finally reading the room, Imun watched Hajun’s video repeatedly. By the time he had unconsciously memorized all of Hajun’s words, Sura waved his hand with a sulky expression.
“That’s my phone, you know.”
“Ah, right. I’ll get ready and leave first. See you at the filming location.”
“At this hour? Do you have somewhere to stop by?”
“Manager-hyung told me to go see Director Kwon for a bit. Probably because of what happened yesterday.”
As he was getting up after handing over the phone, Saha clung to his waist. “Hyung, I feel sorry for you. Just resolve it quickly and come back.” Imun pushed away the mischievous one who was rubbing his cheek and showing aegyo with practiced ease and hurried his steps. He needed to shower quickly to avoid being late for his schedule.
Just before turning the corner toward the shower room, Imun suddenly spun around without warning. He could no longer pretend not to notice the gaze of the two members that had been drilling into the back of his head.
“What, do you have something to say?”
“No!”
Their simultaneous response, as if they had rehearsed it, was quite suspicious. After watching their vibrantly dyed hair swaying with intense head shaking, he narrowed his eyes skeptically.
Come to think of it, hyung had dyed his hair too. He suddenly wondered how Hajun would look with black hair. Since it seemed he had been broadcasting for quite some time, old photos would surely be found if he searched. He made a mental note to search on his way to work and started moving again.
Long after Imun’s figure disappeared from the living room, Sura lowered his voice with a serious expression.
“Did you see his face when he was watching the video?”
“Yeah. It wasn’t for the broadcast, it was genuine. I’ve never seen him smile like that at home. It’s totally creepy.”
“Right. So he can smile like that normally.”
The two members shuddered, wrapping their arms around themselves as if they had planned it.
*
While undressing in front of the shower room, his phone rang. Hajun was the type to move diligently from early morning. Sure enough, there was a notification on the chat window pinned at the top of the chat list.
[It’s like when you find out]
[the friend you’ve shared everything with]
[is actually rich, but even worse—like discovering they’re a Saudi prince]
“Ah, seriously, this hyung…”
Suppressing his laughter, Imun quickly replied. The message was immediately marked as read, suggesting Hajun was also on his phone right now. After exchanging messages with Hajun for a while, Imun glanced at the clock.
It was tight, but if he showered quickly, he’d have about ten minutes to spare. He swiftly asked if Hajun wanted to talk and calmly cleared his throat.
Though he’d never explicitly mentioned it, Hajun was particularly fond of his voice. Whenever he spoke softly, he couldn’t help but smile at the sound of Hajun’s startled breathing.
“Hyung, are you up?”
“On purpose… you, you did that on purpose just now, didn’t you?!”
When Imun greeted him with an almost whisper, Hajun shouted loudly in embarrassment. He seemed genuinely unaware that such an intense reaction only encouraged the other person.
Really, what a fascinating person. Since his debut, Hajun was the first person who remained the same even after learning his identity. While trying to compose his mixed feelings and focusing on producing a sticky voice, he suddenly caught sight of himself in the mirror.
With a comeback approaching, his schedule was so packed he could barely breathe. He hadn’t slept more than three hours in over a week, and now he had a sudden meeting with the director scheduled from the morning.
Normally, he should be irritated from exhaustion, but he found it strange that he was smiling brightly from the morning.
This must be because of hyung too. Somehow, he’d been smiling more since getting to know Hajun. Work was still hard and tiring, but talking with him somehow gave Imun strength.
“Why are you suddenly quiet?”
“Ah, it’s nothing.”
He hurriedly glossed over it and scratched his tingling chest. I was right to call. His foggy mind from lack of sleep seemed to clear just by talking with Hajun.
“I need to stop by the company today. I’ll probably get scolded for yesterday’s incident.”
“…Instead of letting a busy person rest, why do they order you around?”
“Haha. I know, right? Anyway, have you eaten?”
“Is food important right now? Whatever they say at the company, don’t take it to heart. In one ear and out the other…”
Such kindness, taking his side without question. The response was exactly as he had expected.
“Really, you’re the only one who says things like this to me.” Despite his gloomy voice, his face in the mirror was full of smiles. After mindlessly stroking his reflected image, Imun turned his back in the shower room.
I don’t think I was like this at first. By the time he realized his unconscious habit, it was already too late.
He found it strange how he acted like a different person whenever he talked with Hajun. Nevertheless, he kept saying weak things he didn’t mean just to hear Hajun’s warm words.
Hajun was strange, but the strangest of all was none other than himself. Pressing the phone closer to his ear, Imun went into his room for a short call.
***
There was still no reply to the message he had sent to Imun hours ago. After casually browsing through the latest game reviews, he opened KaTok again.
It won’t have come in that short time. He felt pathetic for behaving as if he had OCD. Vowing not to check anymore, he threw his phone far away.
The idol schedule Imun had described was literally terrifying. Moving from dawn every day was basic, and days when he returned home before midnight seemed rare.
He finally understood why replies would always arrive by the next morning whenever he sent messages before sleeping. While feeling relieved that his question was answered, he also felt endlessly sorry for Imun’s situation.
‘When do you sleep?’
‘I take short naps during travel or waiting times… or sleep briefly at the dorm.’
‘…Hmm, alright. I’ll forgive you for sometimes reading messages without replying.’
‘Ah…! That’s because I saw KaTok in the early morning… I was afraid I’d wake you up if I replied then, so I tried to contact you when you’d be awake… I’m sorry.’
Hajun chuckled while recalling Imun stammering and slowly got up. That day, he had ended up upsetting Imun by teasing him too much.
‘Then, please turn off the notifications for my chat. That way I can reply to you regardless of time.’
It was just the day before yesterday when he changed the chat settings to comfort Imun. It was nice that Imun would contact him even in the early morning, but there was also the clear disadvantage of having to constantly check his phone since he didn’t know when messages would arrive.
It would be better to keep notifications on after all. After picking up his phone and thinking for a moment, he reverted the chat settings to their original state.
If Imun found out about this, he would never contact Hajun late at night again. It was better for Hajun too if Imun could reply whenever he was comfortable, without being constrained by time.
“I shouldn’t tell him about this.”
Hajun muttered to himself, grinning as he went to the small room.
*
Fortunately, the incident occurred on Friday evening. Though today and tomorrow were fine, just thinking about next week’s live stream made his head ache automatically.
While ruminating on the donations that had poured in frighteningly, he was browsing portal sites when he inadvertently gasped at the emails filling his message box.
[Boss? Please reply!!!! / 13:45]
[Boss!!!! Please help me!!! / 12:13]
[Boss, please reply when you see this / 11:22]
Most of the emails were from Uijin, who handled YouTube video editing. She was one of his long-time viewers who always jokingly called him “Boss.”
Judging by the sending dates, she seemed to have learned about Imun only today. After reading the increasingly rough content with a sour expression and reluctantly replying, a threatening email arrived within minutes, demanding he get on Discodi immediately.
“Boss! What’s going on?!”
“What do you think? That’s just how it happened.”
“On The Sky? No way, and Seo Imun of all people. So this is what they mean by ‘fans can’t win the lottery.'”
After calming her down as she shouted loud enough to burst his eardrums, he secretly searched for the meaning of the term.
“Fans can’t win the lottery.” Also known as “dukgye-mot.” Uijin, who was asking about his encounter with Imun in detail from beginning to end, seemed to be a fan of his.
Pressured by her persistence, he indirectly explained last night’s events, to which Uijin exclaimed, “Wow, this is unbelievable!” She then went on to talk at length about her history as a fan, though he hadn’t asked. She was quite similar to Mari.
Do all idol fans become like this? While half-listening to her excited words, she continued.
“Boss, I really, really like Imun. Through your connection… there’s no chance I could see him, right?”
“Absolutely not.”
At his cold rejection without a hint of humor, Uijin suddenly became sulky. “You haven’t even met me in person yet.” “…That’s true!” She finally backed down cleanly as if realizing she’d made an unreasonable request, but he still found it hard to feel at ease.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
