Like cooking porridge only to give it to the dogs.
Han Jigang had to swallow the bitter feeling as he watched Nabin open up to Ryu Somin so quickly, as if all the time he’d spent with him meant nothing. But whatever his own feelings, what mattered most was that Nabin regain his strength and return to his old self as soon as possible.
Tae Yishin also seemed displeased to see Ryu Somin clinging to Nabin first, caring for him so devotedly, but at least he no longer lashed out at Nabin without reason like he once had.
The mansion settled into a fragile, temporary peace—like a ripe fruit that looked luscious on the outside even as it rotted away within.
Ryu Somin was like a drop of paint that had accidentally fallen on a blank canvas. It might have been by chance, but once the canvas was stained, it had no choice but to accept it. And Nabin slowly let himself grow used to this new daily life with Somin.
He didn’t even hear the knocking at his door or the voice calling his name. After guiding Han Jigang at dawn, Nabin sat blankly in the rocking chair placed by the window, staring listlessly at the view outside.
When there was no answer, Ryu Somin slipped inside quietly, padding across the room like a stray cat until he reached Nabin’s back. Seeing him so still, completely immersed in the garden outside, he felt the urge to play a prank—something he’d never dare with other Espers.
“Boo!”
Ryu Somin grabbed his shoulder and shouted, but Nabin only reacted weakly.
“……Somin, you’re here.”
He looked up with a faint, tired smile. Where Ryu Somin’s cheeks glowed with a peach-like flush of health, Nabin’s face was pale and wan.
His well-shaped lips were cracked and dry, and deep shadows of fatigue clung stubbornly beneath his eyes.
Seeing Nabin looking even sicker than himself, Ryu Somin crossed his arms and clicked his tongue.
“No wonder you look like this when you never leave the room. Hyung, let’s go outside. The weather’s amazing today.”
The swing in the garden had once been the only place Nabin ever left his room to rest. But it was there that he’d met Ryu Somin—and nearly died at Tae Yishin’s hands.
Even though his body had healed and Han Jigang reassured him he didn’t need to fear Tae Yishin anymore, Nabin still couldn’t bring himself to step outside. Like an elephant raised with chains around its ankles, he was unable to leave the confines of his room even when the chains were gone.
So, as always, he sat quietly by the wide window, watching the colors outside shift with the hours—almost as if that small room was the entire world given to him.
And yet, just as Ryu Somin said, the weather was beautiful. Spring was in full bloom, already preparing to give way to summer. Flowers in bright colors swayed in the breeze as though waving their hands.
For a moment, staring at the deep red roses blooming especially vividly that day, Nabin had felt the urge to go outside and breathe in their scent. But then Tae Yishin’s face rose in his mind, and he forced the thought back down.
“Nabin-hyung, come with me, please? It’s no fun going alone.”
Catching the flicker of hesitation in his eyes, Ryu Somin smiled brightly, clutching his arm and pleading.
“……Alright.”
This time, Nabin decided to be brave. Somin’s request wasn’t new—he had asked before—but fear of Tae Yishin had always kept Nabin from agreeing.
Now, even though Tae Yishin still didn’t like seeing the two of them close, he no longer showed it outright. After the day he’d grabbed Nabin by the throat, and after Ryu Somin had caught him speaking coldly to Nabin again, he’d become far more cautious.
Nabin didn’t know what exactly Ryu Somin had said to him, but afterward Tae Yishin had acted like a dog in desperate need, hovering awkwardly and hesitating every time they met. Eventually, he even begged Ryu Somin to tell Nabin that he’d been treating him well lately.
“I mean it—make sure you tell him today, got it?”
Nabin couldn’t refuse. Even after nodding, Tae Yishin kept reminding him until the moment he left the room after his guiding session. So when Somin came by, Nabin repeated his words just as he’d been asked.
“Somin…… lately, Esper Yishin has been good to me. He even speaks kindly……”
“Really? Looks like Yishin-hyung’s finally come to his senses. Nabin-hyung, if he ever bothers you again, you have to tell me. Promise.”
“……Okay.”
He had agreed, but he never once told Somin what Yishin actually did. Still, Yishin often seemed pricked by guilt on his own, watching Nabin uneasily.
Because of the way he treated Somin compared to himself, Nabin sometimes felt like Yishin was two completely different people. So he can talk like that, too. He can even smile in a way that warms you just by looking at him.
Han Jigang and Gong Min were both always gentle as spring breezes with Ryu Somin, but the difference in Yishin was the starkest. Not that Nabin resented it.
Even he could see it—Somin seemed like someone born to be loved by the world.
When Somin tugged lightly at his arm, Nabin let out the faintest smile. It had been a long time since he’d met someone smaller than himself, or someone so harmless to be with.
The pieces of his heart, shattered by countless wounds, were clumsily stitched back together thanks to Somin. His bright, unwavering smile felt like salvation in the middle of suffocating days.
“Feels nice to be on the swing, right?”
“……Yeah.”
Side by side, they sat on the swing, watching the flowers bloom around the garden. It felt so different from watching them through the window.
From his room, he could only admire their brilliant shapes and colors, but here, the fragrance brushed against his nose—alive and vivid.
It felt good to be brave, to step out into the garden again after so long. Staying in the room had left him brittle, like a plant left too long without water. But even if he hadn’t left the mansion grounds, breathing the fresh air was like rain soaking into dry soil.
Summer was close, and the midday sun was hot, but a soft breeze cooled the air, and the shade of the old pine that had stood for decades sheltered them, letting them sit comfortably for a long while.
“Somin, what are you doing out here?”
“Yishin-hyung, you’re back early today?”
Worn out from guiding since dawn, Nabin leaned back against the swing, eyes half-closed. But the warmth of the moment didn’t last. At the sound of that soft voice behind him, he startled and sat up.
Just as Yishin treated them differently, the two of them met him differently as well.
Somin jumped from the swing and ran straight into his arms. Yishin, used to it by now, easily caught him around the waist, lifting him high into the air before gently setting him back on the ground.
It was the perfect day for Somin’s carefree laughter. But Nabin hunched in on himself like a small animal cornered by a predator. Even his own breathing felt loud, so he held it in, too afraid to let it out.
Since Nabin had grown close to Somin, every little thing that displeased Yishin had led him to secretly torment Nabin, toying with him where no one else could see. Afraid of catching his eye, Nabin froze stiff in place.
“You haven’t eaten yet, have you?”
“No. I had breakfast earlier, but nothing since.”
“Want to go out for lunch? There’s a new Italian place near the Center.”
“Really? I can go out?”
“The doctor said you’ve been doing well lately. Eating out should be fine. You must’ve felt cooped up staying here all the time, right?”
“A little.”
His slender eyes curved warmly. In those sea-colored irises, fixed on Somin, happiness shimmered so brightly it scattered like sunlight breaking on waves.
It was nothing like the way he looked at Nabin.
For a moment, Nabin forgot to breathe as he stared. Then Yishin’s gaze turned on him—and instantly froze over. Startled, Nabin lowered his head.
“Nabin-hyung should come too.”
As if unaware of the tense air between them, Somin grabbed Yishin’s arm and pleaded.
“That won’t work.”
“Why not?”
Normally, Yishin indulged most requests, so his sharp refusal left Somin crestfallen. Flustered, Yishin quickly added, unwilling to let Nabin be the cause of discord.
“I rescheduled my guiding with Min and the Guide. He’ll be here soon. He’s coming back from a dangerous mission, so he needs guiding right away.”
It was half-true, half-lie. Gong Min was returning from a dangerous mission, but the guiding time hadn’t been changed. He could’ve rescheduled just as he said—or even skipped for a day. So long as Nabin wasn’t dragged outside, nothing else mattered.
“Really? That’s a shame…… I wanted to eat something delicious with Nabin-hyung.”
“We’ll go together next time.”
Yishin soothed him with a gentle stroke of the cheek. Because there was a promise of “next time,” Somin quickly brightened, his sulky expression vanishing as he bounded upstairs.
It was his first outing in a while, and he didn’t want to risk pushing too hard for Nabin to join only to make Yishin change his mind. Yishin might let him have his way most of the time, but when it came to Somin’s health, he was stricter than even Han Jigang or Gong Min.
