“PTSD isn’t always triggered by memories of war or life-threatening accidents. Sometimes, if you feel relaxed around someone you’re trying to impress, the concern during sleep isn’t about superficial things like drooling… It might be more about a perceived physical threat from outside. Does that sound close to what you’re feeling?”
“What if… the real danger is that person?”
“Do you feel like your friend might harm you, Eui-sung?”
“Not exactly.”
“Your sleep disorder likely has multiple contributing factors. It may not be an external threat at all—there are probably other reasons. One key point is that when you’re around this friend, certain obstacles seem to disappear. From everything you’ve told me, I don’t think you dislike him.”
“I don’t like him either, though.”
“Especially in your case, Eui-sung, if you truly didn’t feel any affection—if the person made you uncomfortable—you wouldn’t be able to fall asleep near them so easily.”
“Maybe it’s just because I’m physically exhausted?”
“If that’s the case, then…”
“I don’t like him, but… well, we have that kind of relationship.”
“Ah.”
That guy—seriously, he’s a master at controlling his expressions. The image of that stoic face nodding instantly flashes through his mind, and a wave of regret creeps in. He wasn’t even in an actual therapy session, so why the hell did he blurt all that out? It feels like he did something stupid.
Cha Eui-sung scowled hard, forcing his eyes over to the TV. He tried to drown out his thoughts with news about the world, but an uncomfortable feeling kept bubbling up.
…Like him? Me? Like who?
Jeong Seong-hyu hadn’t said it outright, but he wasn’t so dense that he couldn’t read between the lines. His head spun. Jeong Seong-hyu probably didn’t know about the mission assigned by the System, so the guess made sense from his perspective. Even so, Cha Eui-sung trembled as if a dark secret had been exposed.
It’s not me. He’s the one who likes me.
He’d just been swept up in playing pretend lovers. That’s it. He repeated it to himself like hammering in a nail—but then, why did it still make him feel like he was about to snap?
[SAVIOR GAUGE]
■■■■■■■■■■
■■□□□□□□□□
58%
Even though reaching 60% wouldn’t change anything, the way it stopped 2% short felt especially aggravating. Cha Eui-sung had approached Moon Tae-young without any emotional investment, so he’d never expected him to act like a real boyfriend. Honestly, he wasn’t even sure what being a “real” boyfriend entailed besides meeting up and hanging out. Still, if this level of affection was all he could muster, it stung more than it should have. Was this another mental issue? Maybe he’d let his guard down too much after finally loosening up?
Cha Eui-sung ignored Moon Tae-young’s message and closed his eyes. Lately, nothing seemed to sit right with him. Not that he was despairing about life—life was what it was—but his mood swayed like reeds in the wind, and that was something harder to control.
Bzzz—
His phone suddenly buzzed. Thinking it was Moon Tae-young again, Cha Eui-sung flinched, but calmed down after seeing the unregistered number. A number he knew by heart despite himself, thanks to the second life’s “special management” list. He’d even added it to his contacts once, then deleted it in a fit of irritation.
Go Yeong-won, huh.
Not that he was thrilled to hear from him either. Being outed as S-rank was bad enough, but whenever he looked into Go Yeong-won’s eyes, all he could think about was the hell he’d been put through at the Association.
I was going to meet him anyway while I’m in town.
He let out a deep sigh. The whole reason he’d come to Seoul in the first place was to make sure Go Yeong-won’s attention stayed on him. He hadn’t even bothered meeting with Kim Nocha this time, planning to gather info about the Association through Go Yeong-won instead.
Cha Eui-sung hesitated for just a moment before finally answering the call right as it was about to end.
“Haah. What do you want?”
—Ah, Eui-sung. Long time no see.
“It’s been two days.”
As Cha Eui-sung sighed, a soft chuckle echoed from the other end. Gone was the mad laughter from a few days ago—his voice was calm and gentle, eerily reminiscent of the man he used to know. Like breaking into someone’s home never happened and it was all just a dream.
—It’s nothing big. A really nice item came in recently. And as I was looking at it, I suddenly thought of you.
“Suddenly, just like that.”
—I heard you were away from home for a while. Thought you might be nearby, so I figured I’d reach out.
“No one else wants to play with you?”
—Hmm, haha. Believe it or not, I only contacted you. Actually, I’ve been quietly waiting ever since you messaged me. But at this rate, I figured you might leave without us meeting. It’s rare for you to be this close…
“You sound pretty sure I’m near your place.”
—Just a gut feeling. I don’t have any special powers or anything.
That would’ve been touching if he didn’t already know the truth. Go Yeong-won owned homes in all the areas S-ranks frequented. So no matter where they were, they were always “near” one of his houses. Eui-sung only learned this through Oh Se-dan, since he’d never had a reason to meet up with other S-ranks privately.
“Hunter Go probably won’t lie to you outright, Mr. Cha. But that doesn’t mean everything he says is true.”
“Huh?”
“Still, it’s definitely easier to deal with your own ‘kind.’”
If he turned down the invitation, Go would just move on to the next person. But for now, the call really was just to him, so technically it wasn’t a lie.
“Fine.”
Cha Eui-sung answered without pressing further. Originally, he’d planned to see him on his last day in Seoul, but since the message came now… might as well strike while the iron’s hot.
Of course, meeting now meant Go would keep bothering him until he left the city…
But his mood was already a mess. Staying here a few more days would just mean destroying more pillows while staring at the TV. Being surrounded by strangers who didn’t know who he was had been fun for a day or two, but not when he was now weighed down by fresh mental baggage. As soon as he thought of Moon Tae-young, even the slightest hesitation vanished like a snapped leash. Cha Eui-sung shook the dampness from his hair and stood up from the bed.
“Where should I go?”
The turmoil faded, if only briefly, pushed aside by swift resolve.
***
“Welcome.”
The address led, as expected, to Go Yeong-won’s residence. But the place had no signs of actual living—evidence enough that he didn’t usually stay here.
It was on the upper floor of an officetel, a space that felt more like a private lounge than a home. Judging by the not-so-large square footage, it was clearly a place meant for play.
How many houses was this now? The Hunter Association had officially tracked at least four. Everyone assumed there were more hidden under other names.
“It’s so nice to see you here like this. Please, make yourself comfortable.”
Go Yeong-won’s silver-gray hair shimmered in the light. That shade—he’d seen plenty like it in Cheongseri. And yet, it didn’t make him look old. Probably because of the vitality radiating from him like an aura.
Cha Eui-sung sank back into the oversized couch and leaned against it, comfortably. His mood wasn’t great, but he didn’t want to show it in front of this man.
Meanwhile, Go Yeong-won began placing items on the low table—grilled asparagus and what looked like blocks of cheese, probably store-bought.
“The ‘nice item’—it’s alcohol, isn’t it?”
He threw out the question casually. Go’s eyes widened slightly, a smile forming as if to ask, “You guessed that just from the snacks?”
Like I wouldn’t know that’s your go-to move whenever you get the chance.
Cha Eui-sung muttered internally, picking up and putting down his phone in irritation.
Even before the Regression, Go Yeong-won had made efforts to procure expensive Hunter-exclusive liquor to cozy up to S-ranks. If he’d had more freedom, he might’ve circled the globe meeting “kin” like him.
Unfortunately for him, Korea’s S-ranks did just fine without socializing with each other. Even Ji Ha-yul, who was relatively friendly, rarely had time for him, what with her twin sister constantly looming over her.
“Have you heard of Amoras Dungeon?”
Go Yeong-won opened a luxuriously crafted wooden case. Inside was a long glass bottle—its design needlessly ornate—holding a vivid blue liquid that rippled gently.
“It’s a fruit liqueur made from the berries of a tree that grows only in a single dungeon in Brazil. It was a pain to get my hands on.”
“Must’ve cost a fortune.”
“Hm…”
He didn’t answer—just beamed with pride. The kind of smile that said, Yeah, it cost a damn lot, but I’m not telling you so you don’t feel burdened… and also, it’s been a while since someone appreciated this, and I’m loving it.
No doubt it wasn’t procured through legitimate channels.
The mere memory of how many times that bastard had caused problems with illegal alcohol back at the Association made Eui-sung feel lightheaded all over again.
Fuck it. I’m drinking every last drop of this.
A sudden desire to get his money’s worth surged through him. Of course, he’d have to see how strong it was first.
Getting wasted in an unfamiliar place with someone on the watchlist? Absolutely not.
CRACK!
The sound of the bottle opening was like a skull shattering. Bits of metal clattered around the neck of the bottle.
This was Hunter-grade booze—sealed so tight that you couldn’t even open it unless you had above-average strength. A rich, sweet scent—impossible to tell if it was juice or alcohol—instantly filled the air.
Is he trying to get me drunk on purpose?
The vibe was off.
Suddenly, he had the urge to back out. But the phone in his hand—cold and smooth—somehow only irritated him more.
In the end, Cha Eui-sung accepted the glass Go Yeong-won handed over. Hesitating slightly, he sniffed it, then took a cautious sip.
Gulp.
The rich aroma filled his nose, and the tartness kissed his tongue before the liquid slid smoothly down his throat.
Gulp.
He tilted the glass again, letting another mouthful roll over his tongue. His salivary glands tingled. Surprisingly, it wasn’t overly sweet, which made it even more enjoyable.
The whole thing screamed luxury. It was expensive. You could tell without knowing the process—it was the kind of drink you threw money at.
He licked his lips and set the glass down.
Even after just a couple sips, a hazy warmth started creeping in.
He’d have to pace himself if he wanted to stay functional.
Bzzz—
[New message +1]
Right on cue, a text came through. He flinched instinctively.
[L0TTO combo 10 picks, free with no payment https://deabakgaja.at/sop38]
You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.
No matter how many times he blocked them, spam messages always found a way to get through. This time, the “O” in “LOTTO” was actually the number zero.
Grumbling, Cha Eui-sung manually typed in the sender to add to his blocklist—right there in front of Go Yeong-won—and ended up feeling pathetically deflated.
Why the hell was he getting so worked up over this?
That momentary flutter of expectation had been so stupid. He’d ignored the last message anyway. What the hell had he even been hoping for?
Suddenly, a to-hell-with-it attitude welled up inside him.
All his earlier worries about getting drunk, all his anxiety, vanished in an instant.
From the day Moon Tae-young started avoiding him, he’d been teetering—no restraint, no self-control, no clarity.
The icy logic and patience he used to pride himself on had been sealed away ever since they met.
In a sudden flash of anger, Cha Eui-sung shoved his phone across the sofa and picked up the glass again.
Ignoring Go Yeong-won’s gaze, he focused on the brilliant blue liquid glowing in the light—and poured the fragrant, potent liquor straight down his throat.
