‘I completely forgot about it.’
Sophia thought. She had said she would think carefully about the engagement with the duke, but not once had she actually thought about it.
‘Maybe I really am thoughtless, like Ronnie said.’
Sophia felt gloomy. She was nothing like the main characters in the books she read. They always thought about their futures and made plans. Even Ronnie, who was only seventeen, did more thinking than she did. Sophia felt she really didn’t think about anything at all.
‘Felix will definitely be disappointed.’
Felix always knew what he wanted. He even argued with his parents every day because he wanted to give up his title and land to study. He would never understand someone like Sophia.
But even so, she couldn’t just ignore his sincerity. After thinking for a moment, Sophia opened her mouth.
“Felix, um… about the engagement with the duke.”
“Hm?”
Felix was looking at some papers and replied gently. Sophia cleared her throat awkwardly before continuing.
“I think I’ll just go through with it. As you know, I’m not in a position to be picky. You know how people view a woman who’s been dumped. And it’s not like I have any talent to live on my own either. I thought about it, and I guess I’m just that kind of person. Someone who enjoys short excitement and fun rather than deep reflection. For someone like you to exist, maybe someone like me needs to exist too. That keeps the world in balance, right?”
Sophia gave a small awkward laugh and finished her sentence. She avoided Felix’s eyes and looked down at the ring on her hand instead. Then, Felix’s hesitant voice came quietly.
“What are you talking about?”
“Huh?”
Sophia looked up in surprise. Felix was smiling slightly, but he looked at her like she had said something strange.
“So you weren’t planning to get engaged to the duke?”
“…”
Sophia looked at Felix with a puzzled expression. But honestly, it seemed like Felix was even more confused. He looked at her like he had no idea what she was talking about.
As if he had forgotten everything he said that day. No, as if he had never said it at all.
Sophia felt a little scared by the situation, but she forced a laugh and spoke casually.
“I was just joking. You still fall for stuff like that, huh, Felix?”
Felix frowned slightly, as if he didn’t understand why she would joke about something like this. It really seemed like he had forgotten everything he said that day.
‘Lately, you seem unstable. If it’s just the poison, then fine, but sometimes you look like someone pushed you off a cliff. That worries me. When I said the engagement was just words, I didn’t mean you should disrespect the duke. I meant there’s a way out if we need one.’
Could that really be?
Sophia was confused. What Felix said that day didn’t sound like something he’d say on impulse and forget. He had clearly hesitated a lot before speaking. That meant he had thought about it for a long time.
Was he drunk back then?
No, even if he had forgotten saying those things, he wouldn’t act like Sophia was saying something completely random now.
Sophia held her head. Everything felt so confusing. Felix was acting like someone had erased his memories. The seed of doubt grew stronger. After a moment of silence, Sophia quietly asked,
“Felix. Do you know what kind of poison I took?”
“Hmm… I don’t remember. The name was really complicated. I bet even my father wouldn’t know if you asked. Why do you ask?”
It was a lie.
Felix never forgot strange names once he heard them. Sophia felt chills at how strange everything was becoming.
Why doesn’t anyone know what kind of poison I took? Why… doesn’t anyone care? How is that possible?
It felt like she was trapped in a carefully planned trap that kept repeating. Like a monster endlessly wandering inside a maze garden.
“I have to go.”
Sophia suddenly stood up. Felix called her name several times from behind, but she didn’t turn back.
Ronald was right. This was strange. There were too many things that didn’t make sense if this was just the result of being poisoned. She was the one who took the poison, so why was Felix the one acting like he had lost his memory? Or… was all of it an illusion?
Could it have been a dream? Did she really experience it all?
Sophia felt scared. But that didn’t mean she could just sit still like a fool.
‘Sophia, you have to think seriously. You have to figure out why this is happening to you. You have to really try to understand what’s going on.’
Ronald was right. Sophia needed to figure out what was really happening to her.
Someone who might know about the poison.
There was still one person left. Someone unforgettable. Someone who definitely had to know.
Duke Callas Silvetao.
But instead of going to see the duke, Sophia decided to try and understand the situation on her own first. The countess told her to trust the duke, but something in Sophia’s instincts warned her not to trust him too much. His words were too smooth. That probably meant he had cut out a lot of things.
“And among the things he cut out… there’s probably the truth too.”
Sophia felt like the duke was hiding something from her. She didn’t know if he was doing it for her sake or for his own, but either way, she was sure he wasn’t telling her everything.
“Then I’ll just have to find out myself.”
With that, Sophia looked around, pulled her cloak up over her head, and quietly slipped out of her room. It was hard to sneak out without anyone noticing in a place always crowded with servants.
Using the hidden corners of her home, Sophia barely made it outside without being seen. But even in the garden, she couldn’t relax. There were gardeners, busy servants, and—
“What are you doing?”
“Eek!”
Sophia sat down in shock at the sudden voice. She looked up to see Ronald looking down at her calmly.
“What are you doing here?!”
she shouted. Ronald replied in his usual calm tone.
“I’ve been out here most of the time since I got here.”
“Are you saying my house is boring?”
“To be honest, yeah. But it’s the same for my house too. Anyway, where are you going, Sophia?”
Ronald asked with a curious look. Sophia stood up, clearing her throat awkwardly. If she told him, he would definitely follow. She was about to make up an excuse, but then tilted her head slightly.
‘Come to think of it, is there a reason to hide it?’
Ronald was the one who climbed a tree and searched a corpse just to prove Sophia wasn’t crazy. If she had to choose one person to go with her, Ronald was probably the best choice.
“Wanna come with me?”
Sophia fixed her cloak and asked. Ronald was surprised but then nodded with his usual boyish smile.
“Sure. Where are we going?”
She had planned to go alone, so the place wasn’t far. Sophia walked ahead, avoiding people, and answered.
“The ranch. It’s not far from here.”
“The ranch? Why the ranch?”
He truly didn’t get it. For a noble lady like Sophia to go to a ranch was nearly unheard of.
“I need to check something.”
Sophia was firm.
Even when it started to rain on the way, she didn’t say a word about turning back.
Unlike Sophia, who had a cloak, Ronald had nothing and got soaked. He shook his curly hair in annoyance.
The ranch owner was shocked when the two soaked strangers introduced themselves as nobles.
“Oh my… Why would nobles like you… come here…”
“We won’t stay long. We just need to check something. Can you show us the animals?”
Since the place also did slaughtering, the smell was naturally terrible. The mix of animal waste and feed made even Ronald pinch his nose in disgust. But Sophia’s eyes were serious, and her manner was polite. The ranch owner nodded before he even realized it.
‘I need to check the smell.’
Sophia whispered, clenching her fist. She came here to figure out the source of the strange scent that followed her.
‘Smells come from real substances. Saying I’m smelling something that doesn’t exist just because I’m going crazy doesn’t make sense.’
Of course, she didn’t fully believe Ronald’s words either. There were people in the world who saw things that weren’t there. But she came here because of what she had experienced so far.
