When Sophia quickly wiped away a tear, Felix, startled, reached out to stop her.
“Are you really okay?”
“Oh, it’s not what you think. I was just touched by what you said. I’m fine. Really.”
“……”
Sophia hugged Felix around the neck and wiped her tears on his clothes with a sniffle.
“……”
Felix waited silently for her crying to stop, but then noticed something strange and spoke.
“…Sophia, are you wiping your tears on my clothes?”
“No.”
“I can feel it, you know.”
At Felix’s blunt comment, Sophia grumbled.
“Can’t you just let it go? You said you’d support me if I broke off the engagement with the Duke, but you can’t handle a few tears on your clothes?”
“That’s different.”
“How?”
“It just is. Only my fiancée is allowed to get my clothes wet with tears.”
“Ugh, how old-fashioned. No, wait—are you really planning to get married someday? Or are you just going to study until you die?”
“My engagement isn’t the issue here. Sophia, what do you really want to do about your engagement?”
Felix gently pulled Sophia away and looked at her seriously. His eyes showed that if she said she wanted to break off the engagement right now, he would do everything he could to protect her.
But the problem was, Sophia wasn’t as determined as Felix. All she wanted was peace. She didn’t have the will or firm belief to fight for anything.
Feeling a little ashamed of herself, Sophia avoided giving a proper answer to Felix’s serious question and changed the subject.
“By the way, Felix, didn’t you like the Duke?”
Felix frowned slightly and replied.
“I do. But not more than I value your freedom.”
Sophia smiled without saying anything and hugged Felix again. This hug was short, and a little bittersweet.
She promised Felix she’d think more seriously about her engagement and left the study.
She had been to the estate a few times, so she didn’t need a servant to guide her back. On the way, she almost bumped into an older maid as she turned a corner.
“Oh, I’m so sorry, miss!”
Thankfully, they didn’t collide, but a small bottle rolled off the silver tray the maid was carrying and stopped at Sophia’s feet. She picked it up, recognizing it right away—it looked exactly like the medicine she took every night.
But why was this maid carrying it?
“Is Erica sick or something?”
Since Erica, her personal maid, had come with her to Rillum to handle her medications and things, Sophia asked that.
She could still remember Erica excitedly chatting about staying at Rillum overnight just the night before.
But the maid she’d just run into looked confused, as if she’d never even heard Erica’s name. She seemed more interested in when Sophia would give back the bottle.
Only then did Sophia realize it wasn’t hers and placed it back on the maid’s tray. The maid visibly relaxed.
It’s exactly the same bottle…
Sophia thought. The maid had come from near the main room. Sophia began to wonder if the maid had brought this from the Duke’s room.
“Does the Duke take this medicine too?”
Since the Duke had given her the medicine, maybe he was taking it as well. But the maid looked startled and laughed quietly.
“Oh, no, miss! That’s for animals, not people! If a person takes it, it could be very dangerous!”
“Dangerous? Why?”
“It’s used to calm animals before they’re slaughtered. Oh, maybe I shouldn’t have said that… Anyway, the local medicine wasn’t effective, so the Duke started using the ones he made himself. You know, the Duke is amazing at making medicine too, right, miss? There’s nothing he can’t do.”
The maid casually changed the topic by praising the Duke.
But Sophia was too shocked to respond. The medicine that looked just like hers was used to calm animals before they were killed.
‘You’re not sleeping well again, are you? Are you taking your medicine?’
Sophia remembered the Duke’s words as he supported her. A chill ran down her spine.
But she quickly shook her head.
She had already taken her medicine, and she was fine now. It must just be a similar bottle. That’s what she told herself as she sent the maid away.
The next day, they went on a peaceful and pleasant picnic, sailing a boat on a large river inside the Rillum estate grounds.
The Duke wore white pants and a cheerful blue-striped knit vest, with the sleeves of his white shirt rolled up. Everyone was amazed, even Sophia—who had just yesterday suspected the Duke of giving her strange medicine—couldn’t help but admire the sight of him walking down the stairs.
The Duke clapped his hands once to snap everyone out of their daze.
“We repaired the boat, but it’s still old, so please be careful. Try not to go too far. The guide will explain the details, but I hope no one ends up soaked.”
With that, they all headed outside.
Of course, Sophia got on the boat with the Duke. He rowed naturally.
Sophia sat in the swaying boat, nervously touching the corner of the poetry book she had brought for no reason. The smell of food, the river, and nature filled her lungs in a rare moment of freshness.
“Thank you.”
Sophia was the first to speak. The Duke was watching the sunlight sparkle on the water but turned to her when she spoke.
Sophia adjusted the ribbon on her hat again. The sunlight reflecting off the river was too bright. The Duke’s blond hair blew in the breeze, and his blue eyes were clearer than the water.
“What are you thanking me for?”
“For inviting us to Rillum.”
The Duke smiled, as if amused that she was speaking on behalf of the group. He also seemed entertained by her stiff manner of starting the conversation.
Realizing he misunderstood, Sophia shook her head.
“That’s not what I meant. You know what I’m really thanking you for. Ever since I started smelling that strange odor—or rather, since you found out that it disappears when you’re around—you’ve stayed closer to me. I know you probably invited us here because of that.”
“Well, I suppose everyone would want their loved one not to suffer.”
The Duke smiled as if it were nothing and started rowing again. Sophia hesitated, then asked:
“Did you make the medicine I take every night?”
At that, the Duke’s hands stopped rowing. The smile disappeared from his face. He raised an eyebrow, as if to ask what she meant. Sophia quickly tried to explain.
“It’s just… I heard something yesterday. I ran into a maid who said you make medicine to calm animals before they’re slaughtered. But the bottle looked exactly like mine. So I wondered… did you make my medicine too?”
The Duke didn’t answer right away. He seemed to think the question wasn’t very important. Looking like he was lost in thought, he rowed slowly and finally spoke.
“Animals die so pitifully. People started giving them medicine not for the animals’ sake, but because their struggling was annoying, or because of the noise. So no one really cares about the pain animals feel when they die. Most medicine on the market is like that. It’s made as cheaply as possible.”
“Then… are you saying the medicine you make isn’t like that?”
“I try to make it different. Money isn’t really an issue for me.”
Sophia traced the gold letters on her green book cover with her finger and apologized awkwardly.
“I’m sorry.”
“For what?”
“I know my question might’ve upset you. It probably sounded like I was doubting you. But it’s not like that. I really did take the medicine last night.”
“Why?”
The Duke asked. Sophia blinked at the unexpected question.
“Huh?”
“If it were me, I wouldn’t have taken it. You don’t often see medicine bottles that are exactly the same.”
“Well… I’ve been taking it all this time, and I’ve been fine.”
“I guess that’s true.”
An awkward silence filled the boat. Sophia liked boat rides, but usually she went with four or five others, mingling in a crowd.
There were always couples who ended up alone because there weren’t enough boats. And now, she was one of those couples. She used to wonder what those couples did on the boat, but now that she was in that situation herself, it just felt awkward—not romantic at all.
Just as she debated whether to pretend to read her book, the Duke’s voice broke the silence.
“But Sophia, what would you do if I really was feeding you the medicine meant for animals?”
