“Sister.”
Edmund spoke with a troubled expression. His voice was cautious, as if afraid it might cut like a blade.
Lilien, with a pile of wet tissues stacked on the table, sniffled as she dabbed at her tears with a fresh tissue. Even though a long time had passed since she finished explaining everything, her tears showed no sign of stopping. After a while, she finally lifted her flushed face.
Lilien blinked her swollen eyelids repeatedly and stared at Edmund.
“Edmund, I…”
Her voice trembled, and she took a breath as if trying to steady herself. Hearing her fragile breathing, Edmund’s eyes darkened with guilt. He felt a faint regret for allowing her feelings for Etricia to pile up like snow. However, if there was one thing he knew about his sister, it was that she had always been tolerant, almost saintly in her forgiveness.
“I… I’m not going on the summer retreat.”
But the words she finally spoke in a now-steady voice were unexpected.
Edmund’s eyes widened slightly. If she were the sister he knew, she should have forgiven Etricia. Then why…
However, his questions were left unanswered as Lilien burst into tears once more.
Edmund let out a dry laugh and rubbed his forehead. Questions were secondary. Right now, he needed to comfort his sister, not question her. His emotions were in turmoil.
Listening to her sobs for a while, Edmund finally lowered his gaze and spoke calmly. First, he needed to understand his sister’s true feelings and soothe her wounded heart.
“Do you hate her now?”
Lilien shook her head vigorously. Edmund asked again.
“Then do you resent her?”
Again, she shook her head.
Lowering his voice, Edmund whispered, “Do you feel bitter towards her?”
This time, her reaction was different. She hesitated for a moment, glancing at him before pulling out another tissue. Seeing this, Edmund hesitated before speaking again.
“It was an impulsive act. She was driven by her mother-in-law’s cruelty and her husband’s betrayal. She acted rashly in a drunken state.”
“…”
“The next day, she went to the guild master to cancel the request, but it was already in progress. That’s why she went to save you herself.”
Lilien flinched at his words, her face turning pale. The realization that she had been on the brink of death without even knowing it seemed to shake her.
“When her home burned down and she had nowhere to go, she intended to stay just for a day. But I was the one who insisted she remain, to keep an eye on her.”
Even though it might have seemed shameless for Etricia to settle in as if it were her own home, looking back, it was simply a testament to her adaptability.
“She likes you.”
Edmund had received reports from Rail about their interactions, but he didn’t need those reports to see it for himself.
The sound of excited footsteps rushing to greet Lilien when she returned home, the way Etricia subtly glanced at the door when Lilien was late for breakfast, the way her smile naturally blossomed when she saw Lilien—these were all telltale signs.
And perhaps that was why.
Even though Edmund had been trying to make excuses for Etricia, he couldn’t ignore how transparent she was in front of Lilien. She always masked her true emotions in front of him, yet with Lilien, she let them show. It irritated him in a strangely uncomfortable way.
“Of course, the way she acts so naturally around you seems shameless and somewhat…”
He paused, carefully choosing his words. Instead of calling her cunning or sly, he opted for a more neutral expression.
“…calculating, but from what I’ve seen, she’s not someone who would harm others without reason. It was all a misunderstanding—”
He stopped himself mid-sentence. The words he was about to say were swallowed back down his throat. He barely managed to hold himself back from crossing a dangerous line.
But he knew what he had nearly said.
Forgive her.
Asking Lilien to forgive the person who tried to kill her.
That would mean that he himself had already forgiven her.
A bitter, self-deprecating chuckle escaped him before he pressed his lips shut.
Yes, he pitied her. He felt a sense of kinship with her—betrayed by someone she trusted, driven by revenge, tormented by nightmares.
But those feelings were fleeting. No matter how pitiful she was, no matter how much his sister cared for her, the fact remained that she had tried to take away his only remaining family. And nothing could change the past.
He had thought he had steeled himself against any feelings for her. Yet, those emotions had managed to creep in, breaking down his defenses and taking root.
With a weary sigh, Edmund rubbed his face. A month ago, he had sworn never to let his guard down. And now, he felt as though his past self was laughing at him.
Meanwhile, Lilien suddenly stood up, wiping her tear-streaked face with the back of her hand.
“No, it’s not like that, so please don’t say anything to Lady Etricia.”
“Sister?”
Edmund’s puzzled voice trailed after her as she bolted out the door.
With a loud bang, the door slammed shut, leaving him slumped against his chair. He massaged his temple with a groan.
Lilien had always been someone who needed time alone when overwhelmed by emotions. He had no choice but to wait until she sorted out her thoughts.
But the real problem was—
“Damn it…”
He wasn’t the only one feeling conflicted.
“Lilien, good morning. Did you sleep well—”
BANG! Tap, tap, tap—
As soon as Lilien entered the dining room and saw me, she froze in shock before fleeing.
I awkwardly lowered my half-raised hand and sighed.
This had been happening for five days now. I wasn’t surprised anymore, but the pain, like needles pricking my heart, remained.
I momentarily met Edmund’s gaze. When I gave him a small, strained smile, his eyes flickered before he quickly looked away.
Huh. He had turned away before when I teased him, but never so obviously without reason.
I suddenly had a thought.
“Brother-in-law, do you know why Lady Lilien is acting this way?”
He remained expressionless, but his hand, which had been holding a glass of water, twitched slightly.
Ah, he does know!
I hurriedly asked, “If you know, then—”
“I understand. I’m leaving.”
Placing his napkin on the table, Edmund cut me off, answering Rail instead as he stood up. His intention to avoid my question was blatant.
“Huh? But I didn’t say anything…”
Rail, who had been standing nearby, blinked in confusion. Edmund, now walking briskly past him, shot him a sharp look. Understanding the silent command to follow, Rail quickly excused himself and left with him.
“What the hell…”
A chill ran down my spine as an unsettling feeling crept in.
Hesitating, I finally made a decision. If Lilien kept running away, I would have to confront her directly.
Taking a deep breath, I knocked on her door.
“Lilien, it’s me.”
Inside, I heard a thud and then Mary, her maid, exclaiming, “My lady!”
The reaction was intense. After a long silence, I spoke again.
“Why won’t you eat?”
Silence.
I felt my confidence waver. Turning away, I caught sight of the garden through a small window.
Then it hit me.
“That’s it.”
A relieved smile spread across my face.
After Etricia disappeared, Lilien stayed with her face buried in the bed for a long time before slowly getting up.
In just a few days, her eyes had become sunken, and her hair had turned rough like straw.
When the maid, Marie, handed her a small mirror, Lilien lowered her eyes at the reflection looking back at her.
Marie, watching carefully, asked with concern.
“My lady, the master and the countess both keep asking if you’re eating… It’s really hard for me to be stuck in the middle. I’ll bring you some warm soup at least, so please just have a little.”
Lilien glanced at Marie, who was nearly in tears, then nodded reluctantly.
Marie smiled brightly and left. Lilien collapsed onto her side again.
As time passed, her eyes began to fill with tears once more.
