He’s more serious than Seiyad expected. Honestly, there’s not even a trace of hesitation in him.
Seiyad felt caught off guard, blindsided by something he hadn’t anticipated. Just as Ressas turned out to be unexpectedly sincere, Seiyad, too, had naturally assumed he would be the one to take the lead. That belief had been ingrained in him since birth, reinforced by everything he’d been taught and had come to accept as obvious.
In same-sex relationships between a Tither and a Guide, it was almost always the Tither who took the Guide. It wasn’t just because a Tither would lose control during moments of Purification—but also because, in terms of strength and size, the Tither held a clear advantage. Even between the two of them, if Seiyad used even a little of his ability, Ressas would be completely overpowered. So thinking that way felt natural—inevitable, even.
Especially when you looked at him. Ressas had grown taller than him. Their physiques weren’t drastically different, but still—Ressas possessed a beauty that defied human standards. It wasn’t the kind of beauty you’d find in polished ornaments or manmade art. It was the kind of awe-inspiring, untouchable beauty you felt when seeing a perfect flower bloom or a tree standing in full splendor the moment it’s born.
He’s that pretty… and yet he’s trying to take me with that face…?
The more he thought about it, the more baffled Seiyad became. Embarrassed. Flustered. Completely unsure of what to do. Dozens of reasons flashed through his head—reasons why he should be the one leading this. Just based on experience alone, things would go more smoothly that way…
“Yeah… every time I look at Eid, those thoughts just come up. I guess my body’s gotten used to it. And now that I feel like you really want me as a lover… it’s getting harder to hold back. I read somewhere that sex between men is painful at first, until you get used to it, but… the idea of you being in pain—I’d rather die.”
Every one of Seiyad’s arguments, all his justifications spinning in his head, vanished the moment Ressas whispered that. Seeing someone bigger than him blushing furiously, confessing so timidly… it made all his stubborn reasoning feel ridiculous.
…Yeah. He’s been showing signs for a while.
Seiyad finally understood why Ressas had been so withdrawn lately, always holding back. Behind that elegant, princely face were thoughts fit for a horny teenager. And the idea of hurting Seiyad in the process had terrified him so much that he hadn’t even dared to kiss him.
If he’d just acted like a thoughtless man, blinded by lust and rushing forward, Seiyad could’ve easily rejected him. But as always, Ressas was being excruciatingly considerate.
And yet, what he wanted—was painfully clear.
Even as he said he couldn’t stand the thought of Seiyad being in pain, the idea of letting Seiyad take the lead had clearly never even crossed his mind. That’s how deeply—consciously or not—he’d formed a picture of what he wanted. And Seiyad didn’t want to shatter that.
Especially since, not long ago, he’d said it didn’t matter what Ressas wanted. And he’d meant it. Whatever Ressas asked for, he genuinely wanted to give. To someone whose entire life had once revolved around him, Seiyad wanted to bring nothing but happiness now.
So what could he do?
He’d give him what he wanted.
Truthfully, Seiyad had wanted this too—everything they hadn’t been able to do until now. He wanted to be closer, to do the kinds of things lovers did, to feel each other completely. Who ended up on top didn’t matter. What mattered was the emotion they shared.
Of course… saying it didn’t bother him at all would be a lie. But the thought of crushing Ressas’s hopes—of dismissing something he’d clearly struggled so much with—felt wrong. Especially as the older one, as someone who should understand better. And when someone as reserved as Ressas was showing his desires this openly, trampling on that would be nothing short of cruel.
“There’s no need to hold back. It’s natural to feel desire when the person you love is right in front of you.”
Having sorted through his thoughts, Seiyad spoke in a calm voice. At that, Ressas, who had been staring at the floor, slowly lifted his head.
When Seiyad saw those beautiful eyes filled with worry, he could immediately guess what was going through his mind. It was the same look Ressas had worn in his youth—afraid of being judged, of being rejected.
“You think I’d see you differently because of that? I’m happy you told me what you want.”
“…You’re not disgusted by me? Even though I’m standing here in front of Eid, thinking such dirty thoughts like some depraved lunatic?”
“Didn’t you once beg me to see you as a man? I clearly remember you saying you wanted to take me.”
“That was back when Eid didn’t truly know what kind of person I was. Back then… I never even imagined you’d love me. I didn’t think I deserved it, and I certainly wasn’t in any place to receive it. I acted recklessly because I believed your heart would never return to me… That’s all it was.”
Whenever moments like this happened, Ressas’s mind had a way of retreating to the past. Seiyad had expected this. Healing takes time. Even he had needed a long time to fully accept himself, so it made sense that Ressas would need just as much—if not more. Still, hearing those words tore at him. His brow tightened instinctively.
“All I wanted… was to show you that even someone like me could love you. I wanted you to see that you’re someone worthy of being loved—by anyone.”
“Your Highness.”
Seiyad couldn’t bear to hear him speak that way any longer. His voice was firm.
“When you talk like that, it hurts. Just like how you hated it when I used to loathe myself. Don’t worry about something as trivial as getting hurt during sex. Worry about what’s happening right now.”
Ressas’s eyes widened—like the thought had never even crossed his mind. Seiyad nearly let out a bitter laugh. He was so earnest, so pure, it was overwhelming.
“Even if it’s all in the past, I don’t want to hear you talk like that again. Instead of wasting time with that kind of self-pity, it’d be far more productive to think about how exactly you plan to sleep with me. You said you didn’t want my love, but let’s be honest—look at how hard you tried to come across as a mature, grown man in front of me. You’ve always wanted to be loved by me.”
The color that had drained from Ressas’s face came rushing back in a deep flush. He parted his lips but couldn’t find any words. Seiyad glanced him over with a soft smile, clearly amused. This shy, flustered version of Ressas suited him far too well.
“You’ve definitely become a man. Every time you get aroused, it’s unmistakably obvious. The raw masculinity in your body—it’s hard to ignore. Impossible, really.”
“Eid—I’m sorry! I’m really sorry…!”
Ressas looked like he could die of embarrassment. His voice trembled as he reached for Seiyad, hands shaking. But Seiyad wasn’t about to stop. He wanted to fluster him so thoroughly that Ressas couldn’t think straight.
“Considering how well-endowed you are, I understand your concern about hurting me. But, Your Highness, don’t forget—I’m a Tither. I may not have battles to fight anymore, but my body and power haven’t just vanished. Compared to getting torn apart by monsters, wouldn’t a bit of pain from the person you love be… welcome? At least that pain would come from love.”
“Eid, please… stop… If you keep saying things like that…”
His usually smooth baritone voice deepened, dipping into a low rasp that scraped the floor like a slow drag of tension. The sound was hoarse, tight, and thick with desire. Seiyad knew he’d hit his mark. He smirked as he tilted his head.
A glance downward revealed the clear outline of Ressas’s arousal pressing against his clothes—so large and defined it looked ready to tear through the fabric. Seiyad swallowed hard.
He got that worked up… just from words? The very thought of how shy he’d be in bed stirred something deep in Seiyad. Even knowing he would be the one taking that beast, the idea still excited him.
As Seiyad lifted his gaze, their eyes met. Ressas looked utterly mortified, like a man who’d just been stripped bare and teased mercilessly. His wide eyes and flushed cheeks made it obvious—he’d only just realized what he’d done.
Seiyad watched the subtle twitch of his lips, then leaned in close, an idea forming. He brought his mouth to Ressas’s ear and whispered slowly.
“In your current state, I don’t think you’re going anywhere. You’d better head inside.”
The moment those words landed, Ressas flinched back like a startled boy and stumbled away. Practically in tears, he forced out a strangled reply.
“Eid, please… go in first. I’m begging you.”
“We should go in together. You just gave me permission to do whatever I want—and now you’re going shy on me again?”
“Just this once—please, just for a moment. I need a second.”
Seiyad wanted to tease him more. He really did. But one more word might’ve made him pass out from sheer embarrassment, so he decided to let him off—reluctantly. With a quiet sigh, he turned toward the cabin, pretending to head inside, but kept an eye on Ressas.
Sure enough, the moment he turned his back, Ressas darted into the woods like a frightened deer.
Just like a startled fawn…
Seiyad forced himself not to follow, not to drag him back right then and there. Instead, he turned his attention to warming the cabin. After all, his adorable lover would be back soon—probably after doing something incredibly cute. Smiling faintly, he wandered the area slowly, gathering firewood.
LMAOOOOO Seiyad you bad, bad man 😂😂😂
I’m sure it’ll be an electrifying experience for both of you 🤭