When his face was pale and expressionless, he looked like a complete stranger. But as the flush spread across his skin, intense emotions surging to the surface, he finally looked like Tae Woon again.
“…Woonie, are you okay?”
Tae Woon, unable to respond, clamped his right hand over his mouth, his entire face flushed with embarrassment. Even the sliver of skin exposed between his sleeve and glove was tinged red. From beneath his palm came the muffled sound of a stifled moan, and Yang Eunho’s jaw dropped.
If one had to list the most unbearable sights in the world, watching a sibling’s romantic escapade would certainly be on it. And yet this was even worse. Tae Woon looked not like someone caught after a forehead kiss, but like he had been walked in on mid-sex—his whole face blushing that intensely.
Then, as if snapping out of a trance, Tae Woon suddenly straightened his back. The sudden upward motion startled Kim Sibaek, making him instinctively step back.
“…Hyung.”
“Uh, yeah?”
“About just now…”
Though he had called out first, Tae Woon bit down on his lower lip, his shoulders trembling nervously. After gasping for breath several times, as if struggling to hold back an overwhelming surge of emotion, he suddenly burst out in a rapid stream of words.
“I feel like I will remember this moment—your lips touching my forehead, sharing warmth—even at the moment of my death. It feels like the instant at 19:21, November 6th, 202X, has been engraved onto my heart. Haah, it was so electrifying I think I might lose my mind.”
“…Huh?”
Kim Sibaek blinked, utterly bewildered, unable to process what Tae Woon was even talking about. But Tae Woon barreled on, undeterred.
“Hyung feels the same, right? You will remember it too, right? Even when you die, you will recall it, right?”
“Uh, uh… hmm…”
It might not be for the same reason, but it certainly felt like something he would remember. Caught off guard, Kim Sibaek nodded awkwardly. Tae Woon murmured to himself.
“As I thought. This is it. This is the best way.”
His deep, sharp gaze locked onto Kim Sibaek, the whites of his eyes starkly visible. The sheer seriousness of his expression was enough to make even the dumbfounded Yang Eunho instinctively straighten up.
With not even a hint of a smile, Tae Woon declared in a dead serious tone:
“I need to have sex with you, Hyung.”
Kim Sibaek’s brain immediately rejected what he heard. Was there perhaps some alternate meaning for ‘sex’? Maybe it was slang—like the American way of calling a game of catch ‘playing ball.’
I need to play catch with you, Hyung.
Yes. That would be a perfectly logical sentence.
But Tae Woon, ever so helpful, added a thorough explanation.
“Other terms would be intercourse or copulation. Specifically, the process where a male organ penetrates a female organ and moves. But since men have, well, a hole too, it should work somehow, right?”
“……”
“Oh, and by ‘hole,’ I do not mean the one in the penis. I mean the one between the buttocks.”
“……”
“Ha ha. This is the first time I have ever seen this kind of expression on your face, Hyung.”
He even took out his phone and snapped a photo with a bright, boyish smile, his innocent demeanor starkly contrasting the suffocating silence that followed.
It was the kind of silence that perfectly matched the unprecedented expression frozen on Kim Sibaek’s face.
***
When evaluating the danger level of the Giantvine, the outer area, where its toxins dispersed into the air, was the least hazardous. Next was the basement of the building, where the roots had ceased growing. The most dangerous zone was the above-ground levels, where the stems had fully spread.
Even if it was safer than the upper floors, once they were inside the building, they should have been fully alert. Yet, as they proceeded through the area, the strike team’s pace was sluggish and unfocused.
“Hyung. Hyung. Hyyuuung.”
“……”
“I am really good at sex. It has been a while, but skills do not just wear off, right? I am sure you will be satisfied. And even if you are not, I will make sure you are.”
“……”
“Oh, it is not because I have any illness or erectile dysfunction or anything like that. I just never found it all that fun. Kind of like how you are always too busy with work to spend time with your girlfriend, you know?”
“……”
“I never really understood what was so enjoyable about sex. But with you, Hyung, I feel like it would be absolutely amazing.”
The entire reason for the strike team’s lack of focus was the conversation coming from behind.
Despite Kim Sibaek’s complete silence, Tae Woon continued to chatter cheerfully at his side without taking a break.
[Death and Beauty asks whether this kind of endless chatter would not normally be considered adorably cute, like a baby chick.]
“……”
Kim Sibaek pressed his lips tightly together. Even now, Tae Woon’s relentless chatter was undeniably adorable. The problem was the subject matter—it did not just cancel out the cuteness, it dragged it deep into the negatives.
The Hunters on the vanguard desperately focused on hunting the tentacles, doing everything they could to block out the conversation trickling from the rear.
“They are coming at us from the front!”
“Two from the ceiling!”
Even though he shouted the warning with extra force, the chatter from behind slipped clearly into his ears.
It was not that Tae Woon and Kim Sibaek were slacking or distracted while fighting. Kim Sibaek, wielding nothing but an ordinary blade without any Divine Power, cleanly sliced through a tentacle as thick as an adult’s thigh. Tae Woon, gripping his hand like a spear of darkness, easily hacked through the writhing tentacles.
One of the unique dangers of the Giantvine was its ability to overrun an entire building, allowing its tentacles to burst out from the ceiling, the floor, or any direction at any time. But thanks to the two of them, the rear was completely secured. Ironically, this sense of safety made it even easier for the steady stream of conversation to flow freely into everyone’s ears.
Twitching with agony at being forced to witness what felt like his siblings’ live romantic drama, Yang Eunho finally left his post and whispered urgently to Seo Gaeun at the front.
“Noona. Please, say something to Tae Woon-hyung…!”
“Let us not mix personal matters into the mission, Chief Secretary Yang.”
“Is that really the problem right now? How are you even able to stay so calm watching Tae Woon-hyung like that?”
Unlike him, Seo Gaeun had already cycled through shock, denial, and despair, and had now reached a strange place of relief—at least Tae Woon’s potential love interest was not some ninety-four-year-old grandpa. She smiled faintly, as if she had already given up on everything.
“Do you think he would listen even if I said something?”
“…Could he at least hit on him somewhere private? Why does he have to go on about ‘sex, sex, sex’ while we are hunting monsters? It is humiliating.”
“Look at his eyes. He is the kind of person who would still be doing this even if we were live on stream.”
“……”
“And you know, Eunho.”
Seo Gaeun blocked a mass of writhing tentacles crashing down toward her with her shield as she spoke. Over her head, a massive flower bloomed, attempting to spray venom, but Yang Eunho stabbed it through with his bayonet before it could release its poison.
“If Tae Woon-oppa can sit down and have a normal meal with the Mentor, that is already game over, is it not?”
“…Well, it has been a while since anyone restocked the energy bars in the Guildmaster’s office.”
Letting out a heavy sigh, Yang Eunho reluctantly returned to his original position. Seo Gaeun, pretending not to listen but with her ears wide open, lightly tapped Lee Sarang’s back.
“Hunter Lee Sarang, keep your aggro management sharp.”
“Y-Yes, ma’am!”
Lee Sarang tried her best to stay focused, though even she—normally terrified and trembling while fighting monsters—was too stunned for even tears to come out.
Meanwhile, the conversation—or rather, Tae Woon’s one-sided relentless flirting—continued without pause, like an endless stream.
“I already told you before that my cock is big. Back when we bathed together, I remember Hyung’s was pretty big too, but mine is definitely bigger now. Oh right, you told me not to use crude words like ‘cock,’ didn’t you? What was the term you preferred? Sperm… sperm something? Do you remember what came after that, Hyung?”
“……”
“My sperm and semen… how should I put it… ejaculation? Anyway, since my equipment is bigger, that should be a plus for you too, right?”
“……”
“Hmm, then again, maybe it is too big. What if it hurts you? What if it tears you and you never want to have sex with me again, Hyung?”
“Woonie, shut your mouth.”
If Kim Sibaek had to sum up his current mental state in one word, it would be utter confusion. Being aggressively and shamelessly propositioned for sex—by the boy he had raised practically like his own younger brother—was sending his brain into a tailspin. There were countless things he wanted to say, but this was hardly the time or place.
He had been determined to ignore everything until after they finished dealing with the Giantvine—but even Kim Sibaek finally hit his breaking point and opened his mouth. Yet Tae Woon pressed on, completely undeterred.
“Hyung, this is extremely important. We need to reach consent before we have sex.”
“Who said I was having sex with you?”
“That is why I am listing all the benefits for you, to convince you.”
“Why do you never listen when I tell you to shut up?”
“Because you spoiled me, Hyung. You raised me like this.”
“……”
Rendered speechless by the harsh truth, Kim Sibaek stood frozen as Tae Woon passionately continued his plea.
