#086
Indifferent tone with a calm voice. The clear low voice with distinct pronunciation was part of Yoo Seong-woo that Yeon Tae-soo had always loved.
But why did it hurt so piercingly today? It must be because of the content of his words.
“…Disposal product…”
Yeon Tae-soo absently repeated his words and then roughly rubbed his chin. When the tip of his prosthetic hand scratched his face, it left a red mark.
That was far more shocking than the fact that he was an android. The fact that he couldn’t be cured.
And the word “disposal product” that he uttered crushed his chest.
He wanted to get angry and ask why he would say such a thing, but he couldn’t. He had no right to.
“But there must be a way. Anything…”
Yoo Seong-woo shook his head at his foolishly uttered words.
“No, there isn’t.”
Would it be less desperate if he had eyes that seemed to be wailing for help like before? The current Yoo Seong-woo had none of that.
He merely occasionally trembled his eyelids as if afraid, unable to meet his gaze. Just like a criminal. I’m the one who committed the sin, why are you suffering?
“Seong-woo.”
He wanted to get closer and touch him, but he couldn’t reach out to someone so fearful. Yeon Tae-soo couldn’t keep his unextended hand still, clenching his fist and then roughly scratching his chin or neck.
As if unable to bear the stifling feeling, he roughly stretched the collar of the clothes he was wearing and sat on the edge of the bed.
“You asked me to save you. Why is someone who wants to live making such an expression?”
Yeon Tae-soo blurted out the question. Yoo Seong-woo faced him with a slightly surprised face and then faintly smiled.
“…I wonder.”
Yes, he had said he wanted to live. He had asked to be saved. Even now, he wanted to live. If this survival instinct was an error, there could be no more terrible error.
“I think something bigger than the desire to live has appeared.”
However, something even bigger than that huge desire had taken root inside him. Now it had grown too big to pull out or clear away.
This newly learned emotion was like poison. When infected, even the body doesn’t obey. It’s strong enough to suppress even survival instinct.
Yeon Tae-soo’s gaze reached him painfully, but he lowered his eyes without facing him. He tried moving his fingertips, which still had dark poison in them. This body was still like a bomb. Even though it seemed fine now, it could stop working in just 5 minutes.
Nevertheless, I…
“I wanted to be with you.”
Though it’s probably useless now that everything has been discovered.
“…I’m sorry.”
He had deceived him by hiding his identity. He had shamelessly received his protection while hiding the fact that he was the kind of being Yeon Tae-soo hated most.
“The punishment…”
Just as he was about to say he would accept the punishment willingly—
His upper body was suddenly pulled, and his head touched somewhere. Soon, a familiar body temperature enveloped his face. Yeon Tae-soo had embraced him.
“How much did it hurt?”
He must truly love Yeon Tae-soo terribly. That’s why his breath caught at this simple question.
“How much you must have hated me.”
His heart sank with a thud. Yoo Seong-woo shook his head, as if rubbing his face against the firm embrace.
“How scared you must have been of me.”
A voice lowered deeply. It sounded so full of regret that Yoo Seong-woo finally realized. Ah, this person…
“Don’t you… hate me?”
He doesn’t hate me. He doesn’t despise me.
Whether the cause of that emotion is my hospitality function or whatever.
He loves me.
“How could I hate you?”
The voice touching the crown of his head was heavy. That weight seemed to be gradually transmitted to Yoo Seong-woo. His body, which had been stiff and trembling, slowly melted.
“You’re the one who made a corpse-like guy human. How could I hate you?”
As if to prove what he had just said, Yeon Tae-soo’s heart, touching his forehead, beat violently. This heartbeat clearly had a direction. Then would my heart, resembling yours, also beat toward one direction?
“Am I not disgusting to you?”
Humans dislike things that resemble humans. Even if they made them themselves.
“I am what you hate…”
No matter how much you like me, no matter how intense that feeling is, my existence doesn’t change.
I am not human, I am broken, and I am a being that will only continue to break in the future.
“I am an android that you hate.”
Now that he had finally said it himself, the words became sharp and stabbed him.
“I stayed by your side while deceiving you all this time, why… why are you just leaving me be?”
He thought Yeon Tae-soo would curse him, trembling with betrayal. But he says he doesn’t dislike him.
“How can you forgive me?”
As the fear that had frozen his body diminished, other emotions took its place. Sadness, resentment, grievance, inexplicable welling up.
“And why… did you hate me so much?”
He knew Yeon Tae-soo didn’t hate him as a person. Yeon Tae-soo had his circumstances. The android he had raised had ruined and destroyed his young life. He understood how he might not want to live in the same world as such a species.
Yet why did he feel so sad? Why did he resent him so much? Disgusted by his own wretchedness, he bit his lip with all his might. The pain in his chest was unbearably painful.
Warning: Extreme Pain / Increased Heart Rate
He hated the warning message that appeared even in this situation. Yeon Tae-soo tightened his arms holding him. The firm embrace carried the same familiar scent. It was strange that it seemed to say that his scent hadn’t changed. Even though we’ve crossed a line we can’t return from.
Yeon Tae-soo released his arms and put his forehead against Yoo Seong-woo’s. Yeon Tae-soo’s fingertips, holding his hand, had turned white.
“I’m sorry.”
A four-letter language. There was no way he couldn’t understand the meaning of these words firmly recorded in his database.
But in these short words Yeon Tae-soo uttered, there was something else besides the dictionary definition. Like Yeon Tae-soo, who pretends to be light but carries all the weight.
Though he, as a machine, didn’t know exactly what it was, he knew what Yeon Tae-soo was trying to convey to him.
Because it was already flowing into him through the tightly held hands that had turned white.
An emotion identical to his, as similar as their hearts.
“I won’t ask for forgiveness, Seong-woo. Just…”
Yeon Tae-soo’s face, right in front of him, contorted. A seemingly perfect man hurt like a broken piece.
“Just let me find a way for you to live, by your side.”
He hoped those fragments wouldn’t hurt Yeon Tae-soo.
Instead of saying that he couldn’t be fixed, that he had tried to find a way in Southeast Asia but deep down already knew this body couldn’t be fixed, Yoo Seong-woo nodded. He didn’t want to hurt him anymore.
Yeon Tae-soo held his face. A familiar sensation touched his dry, chapped lips.
His body reacted first. His lips opened, and his tongue softened. He fully accepted Yeon Tae-soo entering his mouth.
Large hands embraced Yoo Seong-woo’s waist. Yeon Tae-soo, who had climbed onto the bed, mounted his body.
Yoo Seong-woo flinched at the cold touch of the prosthetic hand that had burrowed under his T-shirt.
“It’s okay. The old man won’t be back for a while… and his granddaughter won’t come up from the basement until she’s called.”
Misunderstanding the reason he had flinched, Yeon Tae-soo removed his lips and spoke. Yoo Seong-woo wrapped his arms around his neck and pressed his lips to his again.
He doesn’t know how long human emotions last. He didn’t fully understand why he was the exception for someone who hated androids.
But it didn’t matter. He wanted to desire the man before him, cling to him, feel him with his whole body.
He clumsily opened his mouth and pushed his tongue in. He stirred inside Yeon Tae-soo’s mouth as he had learned from him. A tingling pleasure spread up and down his spine from the root of his tongue.
Wet sounds continued. Yeon Tae-soo left his lips to Yoo Seong-woo’s actions while his hands gripped Yoo Seong-woo’s buttocks. The firm prosthetic hand found his entrance.
“Ugh…”
A moan leaked through their joined lips. It was just as he was pushing his awkwardly moving tongue deeper, feeling the hard foreign sensation entering below.
Suddenly, his body stiffened at an unexpected pain. The headache had stabbed his head again.
The pain, like scraping the inside of his skull with a knife, was like torture. Trying to hold back the scream he wanted to let out from the terrible pain, he strongly sucked in Yeon Tae-soo’s tongue to the root.
Misunderstanding the rough kiss, Yeon Tae-soo pushed his finger deeper. The fingertip that immediately found the spot he liked pressed firmly against the inner wall.
He kept moving his tongue to hold back his scream. His body was trembling, but he hoped even that would be mistaken for pleasure.
He pulled at his collar as if to say, please treat me more roughly. Because only you can save me now.
Author: Hyacinthus B
Hyacinthus
